[runs into the room breathless] I completely forgot I was on the hook for this thing! In Yee Olde NBA Atl, Chi and GS are strutting their stuff. In the hockey ice wars there are two great tussles-Was/Bos and NYR/Dal. Oh yeah, Chi/Pit is also worth a looky-loo. College ball has SCar, Butler and Iowa playing but most folks will probably tune to UK/LSU. A pathetic fan (yours truly) will be watching Cuse lose its third straight against Clemson. If you haven’t already, check out this Bring Back Matt thingy site that one of our fellas has put together.
Empty.
http://31.media.tumblr.com/47ac9d27a7fe3c7bda43aeb0058a27db/tumblr_inline_o0c2vhisNO1t2c1u4_500.gif
http://36.media.tumblr.com/b411de245796c0c48a8db6019901cb06/tumblr_o01ledX9lt1s5qhggo9_1280.jpg
Death Star I or Death Star II, when you gotta go, you gotta go.
http://cdn.makeagif.com/media/9-05-2015/q2ifCZ.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/e9e1e5de973f4f168a9ab8ffae6830d3/tumblr_o01ledX9lt1s5qhggo5_1280.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/64083c9e7e777ccd4e09c6e3dca98a7b/tumblr_o01ledX9lt1s5qhggo1_1280.jpg
Plenty can and should be said about Megyn Kelly, but, she absolutely crushed buttpercker Ammon Bundy here: http://wonkette.com/597591/fox-news-hardly-mentions-bundys-latest-armed-standoff-go-figure
I need some perfection in motion to cheer me up from those motherfuckers.
NSFW.
h
ttp://45.media.tumblr.com/5d7f3386ebfd3d216910f1248644c3c7/tumblr_ntbqy1k3sU1sgi8m1o2_500.gif
Question: how much Willett is too much Willett?
http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/pug.gif
Not enough?
http://45.media.tumblr.com/1457193957c8e7760c9a1882f1e882c5/tumblr_nz4bzat5251rbrhnko1_500.gif
Unsure. But, I do know how much Willis is too much Willis.
http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/16700000/Todd-Bridges-as-Willis-diffrent-strokes-16733033-587-446.jpg
http://49.media.tumblr.com/7f51d524854c3471bcb8a4b93c397cd5/tumblr_o0e9zgkQOS1u9o3mxo1_400.gif
http://49.media.tumblr.com/987160e9d078b1f533ed8a7d805395dc/tumblr_nz8237CUTZ1rbrhnko1_500.gif
http://57.media.tumblr.com/ac4aa77bd85302df9d41b74d78f5ed82/tumblr_nho7bwaPkO1rdvi6fo2_250.gif
On the next “Clown Town”: Slappy’s wife says she’s had it with his career choices, and that she’s taking the kids and house with her. Can Floppy and Giggles change her mind? Tune in next time for “Clown Town.” Only on NBC.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/8df5d52f0935afe02f500ae0843401f6/tumblr_nypigqZDIX1rbrhnko1_500.gif
http://49.media.tumblr.com/74fa2d08612f44d52190e8f418be11dd/tumblr_nho7bwaPkO1rdvi6fo1_250.gif
I really hope that is real.
South Korea…Daejon I think. I believe he fell like 20ft and died.
WWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/armed-pathetic-and-hungry-how-the-oregon-militants-revolutionary-plan-went-sideways-20160105?page=2
Ah, so these limpshits hate BIG GUBBMIT so much that not only do accept government subsidies, they’re calling on the US Postal Service to deliver them food and supplies.
Thanks for linking that.
http://45.media.tumblr.com/be5912c21c008f28a0b366ba29e7e624/tumblr_n2cr1nBUDD1tukw8mo5_500.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/84240f459c6579d6c4a0edd47d991299/tumblr_nfbu2rOeEg1rsxqqio1_500.jpg
http://40.media.tumblr.com/ebb85f49c585721f22bfdab9b27303b6/tumblr_nxqbgzXp5u1s1ujmko1_1280.jpg
http://41.media.tumblr.com/77d9cc54fcca735b70684306c6d5e455/tumblr_nrxx2yReXT1qbmjywo1_1280.jpg
That is just so perfect.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/c7f816c9dcbb87aa82e32e20d64d0d81/tumblr_nevpdqxkKi1qas1mto8_r1_1280.png
Hey, where’d you get my 24th birthday photo from?!
http://i.imgur.com/aEd1dOU.gifv
http://45.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdvdwsmQhJ1r6gxmgo8_250.gif
http://40.media.tumblr.com/427f59e2d3e03f7f608d6df5562a2d0d/tumblr_nz9ucsluRG1r10b9mo1_1280.jpg
Cock Buster.
:looks over both shoulders:
::busts out maracas::
Ayayayayaya!
http://45.media.tumblr.com/b1f0f5c29ce278eb057855b932af5f63/tumblr_mibxxpIOZE1rejsa3o1_500.gif
Lil Kimmy tests an H-bomb, all three 24-hour news networks airing reruns of their 20:00 shows. JOURNAMALISM!
Not celebrity related.
http://57.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdvdwsmQhJ1r6gxmgo7_250.gif
Makes me look really fucking forward to be heading to Nagasaki…
Pffff… not like anything bad has happened there before…
http://45.media.tumblr.com/6ea20c1944cad579ccde0ffab13c7b89/tumblr_n7lm3bBJve1tf7a1xo1_1280.gif
http://49.media.tumblr.com/2fae7689ba31ae5443f9e1d19d4e031c/tumblr_n8jxbpnVlR1scyhcso1_500.gif
http://49.media.tumblr.com/4e7b5568b12777f8e616adfcee7d3ee2/tumblr_n8jxbpnVlR1scyhcso3_500.gif
Fucking psycho on the left (the pussy right).
Lil Kimmy is mad no one’s paying attention to him!
http://thediplomat.com/2016/01/5-1-seismic-event-detected-near-north-korean-nuclear-site-sign-possible-nuclear-test/?utm_content=bufferc155c&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer
http://49.media.tumblr.com/38641880a9982416b6e2744217c8e925/tumblr_mtrid8tMJG1qg72ijo1_250.gif
Does the last sentence in the second paragraph contradict the rest of the text?
Fuck Switzerland.
What a completely worthless fucking place.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Jewish_Congress_lawsuit_against_Swiss_banks
So is it Shake N’ Bake
http://assets.kraftfoods.com/recipe_images/opendeploy/Shake-N-Bake-EZ-Buffalo-Wings-55941_640x428.jpg
OAR Taco Tuesday?
People might get confused.
http://encharoladeplaya.com/img-up/companies_pictures/original/0w1l6v-gallery-e-charro.jpg
Which one tastes better on waffles the next morning?
http://i.imgur.com/A1doce7.gif
WTF did I just watch?
Some trust fund kid’s “performance art” project?
A large gif.
Is that the new version of the white panel van?
It’s the pussy (cat) and the multi-colored jizz shots that really complete the effect.
The tires still have about 10 miles of good tread.
Two headed dolphin…don’t see that often…
“All that most maddens and torments; all that stirs up the lees of things; all truth with malice in it; all that cracks the sinews and cakes the brain; all the subtle demonisms of life and thought; all evil, to crazy Ahab, were visibly personified, and made practically assailable on a truck bed.”
Welp, that comment totally kicked more ass than the silly “truck-load-o-sperm” joke I was considering. GREAT JOB MOOSE!!!!
http://41.media.tumblr.com/f436a69c8db692df8134f9a1f5053053/tumblr_nkb20mfyXO1rsxqqio1_500.jpg
I probably would have liked the spermaceti pun, the truckakke wordplay, the heavy LOAD double entendre, the Onan innuendo, the premature left turn witticism, the truck stop whore quip, the diminishing boner bon mot more…… but I digress.
Indeed.
I was tardy with my comment because I couldn’t decide between a first person narrative (TRUCK LOAD! WOOO!!!11!), or two person conversation (“Dude, you got your load on my truck!” Dude II: “Dood! your truck got in the way of my load!”)
And also a third-person somethingsomething I can’t remember….
/pours another
http://41.media.tumblr.com/8aa732671f7395eef9704ab7d9c32478/tumblr_nbkktzoUWB1qz6f9yo3_1280.jpg
The joy of motion and momentum; a study in NSFW.
h
ttp://49.media.tumblr.com/7932b2b1e068557ff1a64495b509fd29/tumblr_ntbqy1k3sU1sgi8m1o5_500.gif
http://45.media.tumblr.com/5062f16a25a9d2fad77251cf28694513/tumblr_nxs8h92q4b1udghf4o1_250.gif
FINISH HIM!
Fatality!
DEAR SWEET JESUS FUCK THAT SHIT AAAAIIIIIIGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
FUCK MOTHERFUCK SHITFUCK GRRRRRRRRRAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Well, pee. Still got a point.
Out of context this is a great comment.
MAFFUCKAHHH WOO
Pit 1 — 2 Chi 6:00.
14:00 left in regulation.
I smell OT.
WOOO
Pit nil — 2 Chi fin 2eme.
Merde.
Jagr just scored his 14th goal of the season.
He’s approaching 800 for his career.
Good thing the Penguins lowballed the greatest right-winger in history so they could sign Russian Asshole A and Cheesy Canada Scrot B THREE YEARS AGO
The idiots who currently run things clearly remember this play with less clarity than I do:
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/1985540/jaromir-jagr-goal-o.gif
Thad Jarvis: Guitar Hero Hero
http://southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com/images/shows/south-park/clip-thumbnails/season-11/1113/south-park-s11e13c06-acoustic-guitar-hero-16×9.jpg?
Where be the link to the thing you speak of?
It’s on the menu.
What “Bring Back Matt” thingy?
Like Matt Ufford?
The guy who banned me for trolling him about the C-Hox?
Yeah, I’d rather not.
If it changes anything, he’s not there.
Don’t care much either way, to be honest.
He was a dick, but that was a long time ago.
UPROXX should have been smart enough to keep the KSK nucleus together, and truest to form they blew it up and turned the whole site into the Fleshlight of the Internet.
That is rude and inconsiderate. The fleshlight helps many a desperate man.
UPROXX.on the other hand…
Pit nil–nil Chi fin 1er.
Hey, I DID eat a taco for lunch today! Orale orale!
So I’m not a racist after all?
No, that’s just good timing.
I had turkey breast and mayo and cheddar on white bread with a Diet Sprite and some marshmallows for dessert. While listening to NPR.
How’s the Volvo wagon running?
You just relived Joe Flacco’s bachelor party.
Chip Kelly wants you to be one of his assistant coaches.
Bill Parcells would feel better if you ordered from a non-Japanese restaurant.
I had a Chipotle Burrito yesterday.
I’m having psgehtti the rest of the week because I’m part spaghetti slurping daigo, WOP.
But I ain’t no dirty Papist.
I’m sorry my Episcopal English side came out in protest.
L’Chaim, bubbele you need to eat more. You’re wasting away.
Slainte, have another Guinness. It’s good for you.
Ach so my Americanshe prisoner. Ve vill have bratwurst for ze lunch today.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light. 18 Whiskey’s that’s a record.
/Drops to floor bites fellow drinkers legs.
Oh Christ help me. My blood ancestry is fighting again.