Your “It’s Never Not Time To Ice” Wednesday Open Thread

I hope you ran your laps today, because dinner is a healthy helping of NUGGETS!

  • And then it will hopefully rise up and kill him!

    Apparently Cal-Lutheran is into deals with the devil, because they signed a two-year deal to let the Rams train in their facility until Stan Kroenke finishes building his Metroplex.

  • According to a story at Deadspin, Chip Kelly threw away scouting reports prior to the Draft, if they weren’t related to players he wanted. Because Chip Kelly, I assume the papers were separated by color first prior to disposal.
  • Mike Tomlin went to Florida State’s pro-day and – as a test – froze the kicker during an attempt from 50-yards. It didn’t work on the kid, because that tactic only works on Steelers kickers.
  • If you want to puke while laughing, have a read of nfl.com‘s story about the Broncos actively considering Josh McCown, Brian Hoyer and Mike Glennon. Pey-pey gets one last laugh at Elway’s expense.
  • Meanwhile, some idiots are talking about Tebow replacing Rubio in the Senate, because it’s always preferable to replace a weak right-wing with a weak right arm.

Hockey Talk: Want to see the NHL version of an ISIS video?

Please to meet Duncan Keith, all-star defenceman and off-season lumberjack. He’s getting an in-person hearing about that, which means at least a five-game suspension. Because his name isn’t “Matt Cooke”, he’ll most likely be back in time for the second round.

Boxing: Fifty years ago yesterday, George Chuvalo fought Muhammad Ali at Maple Leaf Gardens, and was the first man to take Ali the full fifteen rounds. The whole thing is a Canadian “Rocky” tale, and the aftermath of the fight had impacts on both men for years to come. The story of why Chuvalo & Toronto were chosen is good; the video of the whole fight is better. It’s the reason why a certain glamour still exists around the old fights and fighters.

Soccer: Nice win by the US Men’s team last night, and they should make it through qualifying. Canada got waxed in Mexico, so it looks like we’re aiming for 2022 now!

Crimebeat! – Civil litigation edition –  I feel guilty intruding, but these are too good not to let go:

  • Elton John is being sued in California by an ex-bodyguard over battery, sexual battery and sexual harassment allegations. Making it awkward is that the accuser is a former LAPD cop who won the Medal of Valor in 2007, so on the surface it doesn’t seem like a crank looking for a quick payday. For the interested or legal types, here’s the link.
  • William Shatner is being sued in Florida over paternity. Some guy claiming to be his son as the result of an affair in 1956 is suing to get a DNA test and “seeking $30 million in compensatory damages, $90 million in punitive damages and $50 million for pain and suffering”. Here are links to his site and the suit. I’m surprised it wasn’t written in crayon on foolscap.

Now, after dinner is time to play a game,   

NHL: (3 games total) – Flyers @ Capitals – 8:00

NBA: (9 games total)

  • Hawks @ Raptors – 7:30
  • Pelicans @ Spurs – 8:30
  • Warriors @ Jazz – 9:00

No politics mentions by me tonight, because there’s crazy yet to come. NO, YOU’RE FIVE YEARS-OLD, ANDERSON POOPER!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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WCS

Wakezilla

One day, the world will be blessed with an uncensored pic of this

*bites knuckle*

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
laserguru

Today in harsh reality.

My ex-wife’s best friend of 35 years died suddenly yesterday.
Her 19 year old daughter found her in bed.
She was a godmother to my two girls and a friend of mine for the same 35 years.

She was 53.

I ain’t looking for sympathy, her family deserves that. I haven’t seen her for about 15 years.
She was 53. Younger than me.

If I could have a minute to have the floor; you have to remain active when you get older.
You HAVE to.
Your family wants you to live forever. I know you can’t but you have to try.

My youngest has been a fucking rock through this. It was her godmother or “auntie” as she called her and this just devastated my ex wife. I told my daughter to give her mother a big hug. I may have divorced my ex but I still care about her and this was her best friend on the planet.

My daughter said “I don’t know what to do Dad. She is so heartbroken and I’m lost.”

I told her “You are doing exactly what you need to do. You are there for her. You can’t advance time and time is the only thing that is going to help.”

I am so proud of my little girl for her strength and her resolve and her maturity and despite the fact that we are no longer together I feel the loss that my ex had for her best friend.

Life is a hell of a thing.

Mr. Ayo

Congrats on having sex.

laserguru

Oh the stories I could tell!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
WCS

Damn, man. I really don’t know what to say (type?). I really am sorry to see this; that’s a damn shame. I wish I had the propensity for something better, but, give your ex- and your kids my condolences. You need anything, we’re here for ya.

laserguru

Thanks WCS.

It’s more the fact that I’m so proud or sad that my kids have the capacity for handling this type of loss at their early age that I’m most impressed by.

We’ve had an unusual amount of loss and their ability to adjust and move on is a true study in the ability of the human spirit to adapt and move on.

Goddamn I love my family.

Cool kids.

Don T

What is the first sign that the offseason is not an eternal state? It is a bullshit milestone, but the schedule release calms the trembling.

WCS

Wifey (and kid) had a very important appointment today, which is why I wasn’t posting like the dickhead I am. Let me tell you, I was nervous as fuck for this one. Like, the losing sleep kind of nervous.

Well, as strange as it’s been ’round here today (I didn’t see any of it until about 20:00 EST when we got back; not just the appointment, wifey’s uncle from Richmond, VA was visiting), we’re good it seems. Kid’s doing quite well, and she feels fine. Things could change any second, but, right now, there seems to be no reason why a little WCS won’t come into this world happy and healthy.

Calls for a little drinky-poo.

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn184/meatwad555/mr-lahey-is-a-fucking-drunk-o.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Great news, man.

WCS

Appreciate that. There’s been something I’ve been wanting to ask you for a while now, and I either just forget, or have been too drunk to recall. Where in Kazakhstan were you business? Almaty? Astana? Something weird like Pavlodor or Semey?

Getting there is on the ol’ bucket list, though I doubt I’d be able to convince the family a road trip to Boratland would be a fun idea. I’m just genuinely curious where you were, and what you saw.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Almaty; I would expect to travel to the oil fields by the Caspian too, we’ll see. Almaty was great; it was a nice experience. NOTHING like what the media and politicians portray as a predominately Muslim population. Speaking of drinking…. the CCCP left the vodka culture.

WCS

Very, very cool. It’s a shame Nazarbayev is turning the country into his own private kingdom. Makes sense that Uzbekistan, Azerbaijan, and Turkmenistan have done that. Seeing Kazakhstan and Tajikistan do it is just frustrating. That whole region has plans on going to absolute shit when their emperors are gone.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Yes, I know what you mean, but as far as that goes they put a LOT of the oil revenue into the country and it needed it after the Soviet occupation. They had a very hard time, as did everybody when the Soviet Union broke up. I think he was skilled and getting them through that. They ride a very delicate balance of trying to be independent while having the hot breath of the Bear constantly blowing in their face.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Maybe I’m being overoptimistic, but I think the Kazak people will do well, they are an educated population and they have natural resources. They grow most of their own food and they are resilient.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I walked a good deal around the city; high air pollution but nice. Great people, only had one questionable meal, the rest were really good, mostly ate Kazak and Chinese food, went to two Russian style restaurants. Very low crime, beautiful women. They seem to have much more respect for women in their culture, there doesn’t seem to be the leering assholishness of US and Latin cultures. I live in Denver by the mountains, which are dramatic, but the mountains next to Almaty are… sudden, would be my descriptor. They have one fairly big ski area east of town. You could get along fairly easily with some basic Russian which is the business language. The natives speak both Russian and Kazak. The Russian immigrants (maybe 35% now) don’t speak much Kazak was my impression. There is a Central Asia travel guide that has a shit tonne of information (metric), of which I can’t remember the publisher. Their history is fascinating as you well know. We had people from the Kazak company we visited out here too; that was a fun thing too. One of the high points of my job so far.

laserguru

Fuck yes.
Great news.

Wakezilla

OK, it’s time to get off my ass and run. I hope she’s infront of me

http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/running-shorts-28.jpg?w=500&h=492

Covalent Blonde

Not to throw a wrench in your plans, but those socks look like they leave something to be desired. By 8km in she’s gonna have a wicked blister on her left foot.

Now, stationary bike, tho…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Saw Batman v. Superman; my relatives wanted to go so since I like these particular ones it was fine with me, though normally that is not my type of movie fair. While I didn’t like it, it was far from the internet view of “WURSTEST MOOVEE EVAR!!” I chuckled several times, about half of which I assume were intended by the makers. Big sound, big graphics of course. Several cameos, most of which I didn’t want to see. Gal Gadot is an attractive woman. Amy Adams looked great and did what she could with cartoonish dialogue. Jeremy Irons was good as Alfred. Jason Momoa was good as Aquaman since he had no spoken lines. They want you to buy a Jeep among other things. A lot of things did not follow traits of the comic books, especially WW; I’ll let those nerds debate that. The ads and trailers/ PSA to turn your cell phones the fuck off last 239.4 minutes. No wonder I don’t go to the theater much anymore.

I’d rate it zero out of a possible six bison balls. Don’t bother unless you really like this particular type of movie.

Senor Weaselo

So, not a train wreck that warranted everyone seeing it, and not a masterpiece that warrants everyone seeing it.

So why did so many people see it?

Wakezilla

Say what you want about Man of Steel, it had a ton of action in it. Then you add Batman to a Superman movie? People were going to see it because of #branding.

I liked the film. I think as long as you know the story is based on an alternated universe and not canon Batman and Superman, you’ll enjoy it more. It’s definitely a movie you don’t need to see in the theater.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The action was the movie, only enough story to get from one sequence to another. Not my type of film.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I don’t have too much analysis knowledge about marketing of movie entertainment, but I would assume that a combination of the promotions and the internet hysteria were great tools to sell tickets.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Wakezilla

I hear movie theaters are working on a new streaming thing where you can watch new movies at home, which would be great for me.

I saw this film in a VIP theater and the experience was better than normal, but I’d rather be naked watching this film at home, ya know? Also, Central American VIP theaters are way nicer and better than North American theaters.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

So that did not post…..

Wakezilla

“I hope you ran your laps today, because dinner is a healthy helping of NUGGETS!”

Those nuggets were so filling and delicious, I better go hit the gym.

Man, that LA Lakers player, Russell, is one dumb fuck.

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Senor Weaselo

He put it on Snapchat and thought nobody would see. Seriously. You’re an NBA player and thought no one’ll check your social media things?

Wakezilla

My theory based on literally nothing: Young did something really sleezy and fucked Russell over so Russell decided to do a prank that went way too far.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The buffalo balls: a piece (since the actual ‘nad is as big as your head) was (I think) pan fried lightly, breaded, then baked. The spicy breading and mustard sauce were the main tastes, the meat was similar but a bit more flavorful than bull balls (rocky mountain oysters). It was accompanied by a beer tour of a few breweries so the afternoon/ evening was quite enjoyable.

http://www.portlandmercury.com/portland/testicle-its-whats-for-dinner/Content?oid=2518292

WCS

WOO BUFFALO TESTICLES

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Sill Bimmons

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WCS

WCS

Wowzers, it actually happened. First time since 1970 no Canadian teams will be in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. That’s like the Patriots not cheating, or the Browns having competent quarterback play; it simply doesn’t happen, nor should it.

Croooow

At least the Raptors finally got a 50 win season…

Senor Weaselo
montythisseemsstrangetome

1970 sounds like a made-up year.

WCS

Covalent Blonde

Huzzah for 68-7!

Covalent Blonde

Oh god! These time outs are killing me! Darn you NBA!