There was a time when I first signed…
When the air was warm…
And the town inviting…
There was a time when love was blind…
And Cleveland had a song,
And the song was exciting!
There was a time…
Then it all went wrong.
Editor’s note: This post has been in the “drafts” folder for about five weeks now with the following text as the body of the post:
placeholder for when the Browns lose to the Bengals
Editor’s note 2: That earlier editor’s note was actually from prior to the Browns and Bengals’ first meeting, at which point I realized it would make better sense grammatically if I used this post title when the Bengals were visiting, and again was unconcerned that I might miss an opportunity to mock a Browns loss.
https://twitter.com/loadedsanta/status/809104591333691392
But are there are some on the naughty list that will be getting them?
“Estoy seguro que, por ser futbolista, Mike Webster murió”
Damn. Even in Spanish, Will Smith sounds wooden.
My current situation:
– on conference call listening to discovery process for the first client i have signed at the new job
– three year old is standing on the lego table, throwing legos at me
– client has used the term “holy balls” several times and it’s fucking hilarious
It’s now 11:28, at this point in time a glass of bourbon would not make me feel guilty, it’s practically lunch time
What kind of murder did this client do?
I totally forgot about Orlando Brown and the flag to the eye. Also, that he died.
I was going to make an attempt at a pithy Virginia Woolf joke, but fortunately checked wikipedia to see you weren’t making a joke about the last part.
So I am only half as horrible a person as I thought I was when I woke up.
That can’t be true.
I know, right? He’s at least twice as terrible a person as he thought he was when he woke up.
Awwww. Youse guys really know how to warm the cockles of my cold calloused heart.
I had a one of those semi-conscious dreams that I voted for Trump. So I think I’m good so long as I don’t grab any pussi, unless asked to do so.
“Pussi” sounds like something that would be served at the Bosa family’s house with Sunday dinner. “Hey, a Joey. Pass-a the pussi, eh, okay?”
AFter the Ravens got him, I was driving on the highway and the motherfucker came BLASTING PAST ME in a Rolls Royce with the vanity plates Zeus on them.
“Whaddaya, fuckin’ blind? I’m drivin’ here!”
– JJFozz, shaking his fist out the window
“Hey, Cyclops, open your eye and watch where you’re going!”