Your “One Of These Games Is Not Like The Others” Later Afternoon Slate of Games Open Thread

NO/Ari-I believe this one is being played “for love of contractual obligations/the game”. Either way, the ‘meh’ is strong.

SF/Atl-The 8-5 Falcons lovely afternoon stroll through the burnt-out wreckage of another Chip Kelly adventure should result in an easy-peasy W but will be entertaining to only the most hard-core of hidden-basement torture chamber enthusiasts.

NE/Den-The Broncs face a 3 game feast against teams that have 10 or more wins. Oh my. The appetizer is the soul-less Pats. If said Bronc-sters win all three they’re headed to the Super Bowl again or will be so physically/mentally drained they’ll fall apart during their first post-seasoner. You heard it here first-THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND! This is your game ‘o week right here.

Oak/SD-Needless to say, the likes of undrafted rook rb Kenneth Farrow and dragged-off-the-dung-heap Ronnie Hillman are not going to carry the Charger Men to a victory over the Oakland “I can finally see the playoffs for the first time in 14 years” Raiders.

Are we done here? We’re done here. GO GET ‘EM, BEAST-TYPERS!!!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blackroseMD1

That’s exactly how I expect Chargers games to end these days.

Doktor Zymm

Ruh roh, BOLTMAN ain’t gonna like that…

Unsurprised

BOLTMAN’s going to be even more pissed when he’s dropped for a new god

Shogun Marcus

Oh chargers…

Brocky

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blaxabbath

If fake news wanted to do something good for America, they need to start covering how the NFL tampers with league officials.

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The Patriots as a team really epitomize the term “banality of evil.”

King Hippo

No blow to the head on that clothesline of Siemian, but that play in AZ gets one. CURIOUS, eh?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

The entire Cards line gets through and hits Brees to knock NO out of FG range on 3rd down — and the refs give a bullshit roughing the passer call. Replay shows only his shoulder pad got hit.

Yeah, fuck the NFL alright.

King Hippo

REALLY shitty call in AZ

Brocky

patriots defense celebrating a concussion?

I don’t even have the sarcasm to address that.

King Hippo

evil gon’ evil

Senor Weaselo

That seems beyond even mustache-twirling evil though.

blackroseMD1

And here comes the weekly Chargers 4th Quarter collapse. Time to start drinking, I guess.

King Hippo

Sieman really not getting much help today.

Doktor Zymm

So…after their D won them the Super Bowl, I see Denver has doubled down on not having an offense….

King Hippo

it’s brutal some weeks

King Hippo

this is as good a defensive performance as you’ll see. Just getting absolutely SHIT FUCKALL NOTHING from Siemian and palz

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

So, I realized that I just don’t care about football anymore. I care about you guys, but I just don’t care about this enough to do fantasy or buy the Sunday Ticket or spend a nickel on this worthless organization outside of what I spend maintaining this site. The NFL can lick my balls.

...

I’m kind of in a similar place. Were it not for having friends who cared, I’d probably pass watching most weekends.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Right? I’m watching the Leah Remini Scientology thing right now. I have the Sunday Ticket window open, but I’ not even watching.

litre_cola

That show is addictive

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

I’m yelling at my TV. I want to fuck David Miscaviage up right now.

King Hippo

I wish I had the strength. Red Zone is still the closest thing I have to a reason for living.

litre_cola

Shit, I can’t watch a normal tv broadcast of it, commercials make me rage, plus my ADD

blaxabbath

This statement is going to seriously fucking damage our stock.

Someone hurry up and tell the press that Sill hacked DTZM’s account!

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Oh, DFO isn’t going anywhere. I’m going to trash this league with it. Everyone else who loves football but hates the NFL will come aboard.

Doktor Zymm

That there is a rich demographic

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Hopefully they’re #UpForWhatever

Senor Weaselo

It’s dozens, nay, severals of Internet viewers!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28oFounV480

blaxabbath

Would you change your opinion if I told you that St Louis is on a short list of cities TO GET THEIR VERY OWN NFL FRANCHISE?!

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Ha! I wouldn’t take an extension of this cabal if they personally paid me.

Doktor Zymm

Like the checks they give people just for living in Alaska? Hey, maybe a team will go to Anchorage!

litre_cola

Yes, I feel like the product is getting worse, but if I didn’t have this site, I would be only checking in for fantasy football as my league is friends from across my country and it is how we keep in touch.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

You’ll always have this site.

Unsurprised

Welcome to the Dark Side. We have cookies.

blaxabbath

Bradley has to ride home on the Jags team plane?

I hope he spends the whole time being drunk and telling everyone not to bother watching game tape or recovering from the game and to come party with him tonight.

Brocky

I think its unlikely anyone on the team is watching game film at this point.

blaxabbath

Good point. Based on their record, not watching game tape or scouting opponents is the cornerstone of the Bradley strategy.

Doktor Zymm

Let’s do a shot for every loss, WOOOOO!

Doktor Zymm

Knock him down HARDER DAMMIT

Senor Weaselo

THIS BRONCOS DEFENSE, I CALL THEM THE MYTHBUSTERS’ CONSTRUCTION OF ARCHIMEDES’S DEATH RAY BECAUSE TOM BRADY’S STANDING IN IT AND HE’S NOT DEAD YET.

Shogun Marcus

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litre_cola

I hate football. Constant disappointment.

King Hippo

NO SOUP FOAR YOU, Latavius!!! Kill V. Maim will not be denied until championship round.

blaxabbath

Is the Verizon/Sprint guy a homosexual (not that there’s anything wrong with that)?

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Considering how he’s switched sides, I’d guess he’s bi.

King Hippo

Hardly a SS, though…

King Hippo

Gimme one MOAR TD, King Laserface. Wolven solidarity.

blackroseMD1

I like this idea.

blaxabbath

The kid from these Gigablast commercials who makes the mobile has the same look as the kid in Looper.

The kid from Looper needed to be shot, I recall.

King Hippo

13-3, guys. If you aren’t gonna win, at least cripple/murder. FOAR THE GREATER GOOD.

Senor Weaselo

Even if you were gonna win, cripple/murder.

Shogun Marcus

Cannibal sammiches are an excellent appetizer.

litre_cola

Jesus, could Derek Carr get his head out of his ass for the rest of the game and throw to Amari?

No? Why can’t I have nice things?

Shogun Marcus

You know why…

litre_cola

I only touch myself in the afternoon now. I thought that was a good compromise.

King Hippo

so long as he ignores Latavius, we good

King Hippo

SMITE THOSE HEATHENS, PHIL!!!!

King Hippo

I need two good quarters from Rivers and one MOAR Seabass FG, then I think I will survive Hopkins on MNF and squeak into the finals.

blaxabbath

Brian Cushing is a Sportsmanship Award finalist?

Is fucking Trump appointing these guys?

Doktor Zymm

It’s so disappointing when Brady is almost sacked but still manages to get the ball out at the last second.

Senor Weaselo

I wholeheartedly agree.

blaxabbath

And his heart is still beating after the play.

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HE’S SO FUCKING SLOW JUST FUCKING HIT HIM

Doktor Zymm

NO FIRST DOWN FOR YOU, MUWAHAHA

blaxabbath

Wait — are the Jags going to bring on Fischer because he’s experienced at leading [shitty] teams through relocation?

litre_cola

Blax, we need this to happen.

King Hippo

Khan and Fisher’s stache might have some real chemistry, too

litre_cola

I was just about to write that. Not only do we share real names, but now this? Get outta my head!

The Maestro

I’m waiting til the Bills fire Rex. I feel he’d like to get out of the AFC East for a while; plus the weather’s nice, he can party with Rob 24/7, and the Everglades are fantastic for pussytubin’.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Rex and Ash Williams in Jacksonville? SIGN ME UP

Senor Weaselo

It would be the biggest shitstorm to hit Jacksonville since whatever Deadpool referenced in the movie.

blaxabbath

Gus Bradley fired?! Come on!

Croooow

And it only took Bradly getting to 34 games under .500 to do it.

Senor Weaselo

Touching Brady, flag! Wait, holding? On the P*ts? IMPOSSIBLE!

litre_cola

Afternoon all, how are we doing?

King Hippo

SHITTY!!

Doktor Zymm

Halftime eggnog!

Senor Weaselo

Quarter in the swear jar!

Petronel

And that was why ten-second delays exist…

King Hippo

Derby, P*ts plant/saboteur. Motherfucker. Fuck this day.

The Maestro

And Gus Bradley is officially fired. After nine straight losses, I’m stil surprised they didn’t turf his ass even earlier.

King Hippo

still, 2 games to go at 2-12….why fucking bother??

Bortleback

RIP Gus Bradley

Unsurprised

Stupid fucking shoes. I had to walk all the way back home to change them because one decided that it didn’t like my Achilles Heel and was going to chafe it near-bloody. Oh well.

One piece of good news, though. I saw the sun hanging low in the sky and remembered that it’s only going to be getting darker until Wednesday. Come Thursday, the days will be growing longer again for another six months.

King Hippo

I need to move to Reykyavik. Apparently in the winters, the sun never comes out and the people get really maudlin and drink a fuckton.

King Hippo

NO! We need a Seabass FG.

blaxabbath

“What will they say tomorrow?” is the tag line that makes me hate Undisputed even more.

King Hippo

SMART to let clock run. P*ts only have 2 timeouts, so can take a knee and regroup.

laserguru

Since it’s a bit on the cool side today I decided to make a nice pot of stew.

A couple of pounds of boneless short ribs, cubed, floured and browned.
One brown onion chopped
4 cloves of garlic minced.
3 carrots chopped.
Some shitake mushrooms sliced.
2 potatoes cut into cubes.
Enough beef stock to cover.
splash of red wine
splash of balsamic vinegar.
season with salt, pepper and paprika.
couple of bay leaves.
Simmer on the stove top for about 2 1/2 hours on low.
Add in the mushrooms during the last hour of cooking.
Add in the potatoes for the last 45 minutes of cooking.
Serve with a loaf of crusty french bread and copious amounts of beer.

Enjoy.

Home cooked food heals all that ails you.

Stupid fucking football.

King Hippo

oh baby, you got a stew goin’ on!!

blackroseMD1

That sounds like a great hangover cure.

laserguru

That’s what I’m banking on.

Shogun Marcus

Sounds excellent! I’ve got dessert.

laserguru

Bring it on.

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Stealing this for later. Might buy the ingredients for it this week.