Your “We’re Gonna Have A Ball Just Like We Always Do” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Hey there! It’s your old pal Beerguyrob, back for another Saturday night of kvetchin’ and cavortin’. Did you all enjoy last night’s AFL Grand Final? That was a humdinger, and didn’t finish too late on the west coast, so I was up & ready for Australia vs. South Africa rugby this morning.

Shout-out to don_t: glad you’re back on the grid, buddy.

I’d like to thank my close, personal friend gallon_soda for filling in last week while I was off offending Christians at a dog show & catching a delightful cold in the process. The one thing I forgot to remind him of was to present you the broadcast maps for Sunday. Really, I blame one of the Russians that’s always trying to infiltrate the site for sidelining that message. Better that, I suppose, than having Ramon Mercader open your door. Anyways, courtesy of 506sports.com,


CBS EARLY


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

Pittsburgh @ Baltimore Ian Eagle, Dan Fouts
Buffalo @ Atlanta Greg Gumbel, Trent Green
Tennessee @ Houston Kevin Harlan, Rich Gannon
Cincinnati @ Cleveland Spero Dedes, Adam Archuleta
Jacksonville @ NY Jets Andrew Catalon, James Lofton
NO GAME due to local team at home on FOX

I had to look up what a “Spero Dedes” is, because I am unfamiliar with the breed. Turns out, it’s this

and he used to do play-by-play for the Lakers & Knicks. So, no wonder I didn’t recognize him.


CBS LATE


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

Oakland @ Denver Jim Nantz, Tony Romo
NO GAME due to local team at home on FOX

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!1!!1 FUCK YOU, ARIZONA! You get that for ruining Fitty.

Also, Brent Musburger took a run at Tony Romo’s broadcasting style the other day. It came across very much as


FOX SINGLE


 Anchorage AK  |   Fairbanks AK
 Honolulu HI

Carolina @ New England Joe Buck, Troy Aikman
LA Rams @ Dallas Chris Myers, Daryl Johnston
Detroit @ Minnesota Thom Brennaman, Chris Spielman
NY Giants @ Tampa Bay (LATE) Kenny Albert, Ronde Barber, Tiki Barber
Philadelphia @ LA Chargers* (LATE) Dick Stockton, Mark Schlereth
San Francisco @ Arizona (LATE) Sam Rosen, David Diehl

*NOTE: Philadelphia-LA Chargers will air in Los Angeles on KCOP My 13.

I can’t wait to hear the crowd reaction in the Eagles second home, the StubHub Center. Stockton’s going to be ‘gifted’ enough batteries for a billion pacemakers.


Canada:

Sunday – 1pm et/10am pt

Bills vs. Falcons (CTV Toronto, CTV Kitchener)
Rams vs. Cowboys (CTV Alberta, CTV Saskatchewan, CTV BC)
Panthers vs. Patriots (CTV, Montreal, CTV Atlantic)
Steelers vs. Ravens (CTV Winnipeg, CTV Ottawa, CTV Northern Ontario)
Lions vs. Vikings (TSN2)

Sunday – 4:05pm et/1:05pm pt

Giants vs. Buccaneers (TSN2)

Sunday – 4:25pm et/1:25pm pt

Raiders vs. Broncos (CTV Network EXCEPT CTV Atlantic, CTV Two Atlantic)


Tonight’s sports:

  • NCAA:
    • Mississippi State at Auburn – 6:00PM | ESPN
    • Memphis at Central Florida – 7:00PM | ESPN2
    • Clemson at Virginia Tech – 8:00PM | ABC
    • Oklahoma State at Texas Tech – 8:00PM | FOX
    • Mississippi at Alabama – 9:00PM | ESPN
    • Colorado at UCLA – 10:30PM | ESPN2
    • California at Oregon – 10:30PM \ FS1
    • San Jose State at UNLV – 10:30PM | ESPNU
  • CFL:
    • Argonauts vs. Tiger-Cats – 6:30PM | TSN
    • Blue Bombers vs. Eskimos – 9:30PM | TSN
  • MLS:
    • Toronto FC vs. NY Red Bull – 7:00PM | TSN2
    • Sporting KC vs. Whitecaps FC – 9:00PM | TSN2
  • NHLX:
    • Red Wings at Leafs – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Oilers at Canucks – 10:00PM | Sportsnet

Other TV:

  • SNL: Ryan Gosling / Jay-Z – 11:30ET/8:30PT – NBC / Global
    • Season premiere; live from coast-to-coast

Next Saturday, Canadians get “Hockey Night In Canada” back. IT’S THE MOST….WONDERFUL TIME…OF THE YEAR!!!

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Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised

The drugs kicked in.

Unsurprised

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ballsofsteelandfury

I’m really disappointed now that RTD is not going to take his box of batteries to Carson for the Philly fans that will take over the stadium.

Senor Weaselo

Holding on Bobo!

ballsofsteelandfury

Qué bobo!!

Brick Meathook

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Romonobyl

Just saw a commercial that claimed the average American drinks 236 beers a year.
I always knew I was above average.

Senor Weaselo

“I guess I need to pick up the pace, 236 different beers is a fair number.” -Makeitsnow

Unsurprised

I don’t drink enough, so you’re helping to keep that average up.

Unsurprised

#UpForWater

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Romonobyl

Pass that around, Steve!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Miss Piggy finally got sick of his shit.

Unsurprised

Yeah, that’s the astonishing part.

Romonobyl

Love the Invader. Wouldn’t wanna be on the receiving end though.

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

There’s a guy named Bobo on the Colorado? All right, go them.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Romonobyl

Clearly offensive paws interference.

I really crack myself up sometimes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I got myself with the Japanese Prime Minister joke below.

Brocky

I cannot legitimately remember the last time i felt this guilty.

Crashing on a buddy’s couch. Couch is apparently where said buddy’s adorable boxer dog typically sleeps. Said dog is lying in the floor giving me a pathetic look.

Poor thing

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Make the dog promise no funny stuff and then share.

Unsurprised

It’s only fair that Brocky should promise the same.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

At the moment I’m just one drink away from laying on the floor pathetically.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

He survived that pretty god.

Romonobyl

I heard Sears was having problems, but damn!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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THANKS ABE!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Shogun Marcus

When does Alabama start getting slapped down for being in a crap conference?

Unsurprised

Never

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fun fact: “crap conference” was the informal name by which administrators referred to Najeh Davenport’s disciplinary hearing.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Romonobyl

Was watching Kingsman, dozed off, wife switched to 50 First dates. It’s a shame my lawyer doesn’t work weekends.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

Kingsman kinda sucked. Your wife might have saved you from disappointment.

Romonobyl

Actually seen it already, I agree. Samuel L. will always be Jules from Pulp Fiction to me. That lisp he has in Kingsman is disturbing.

Unsurprised

He was playing Russell Simmons, who most people don’t realize also has a lisp.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Was that what it was? It was disturbing…gotta agree with that. The product-placement was also disconcerting.

Romonobyl

I hate that. The 007 movies were the worst in that respect.

Unsurprised

Sam Jackson did me in " Kingsmen "w/my old lisp , halarious made speak w/lisp last 2days #ImageAwards

— Russell Simmons (@UncleRUSH) February 7, 2015

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Kind of tragic that a guy with four S’s in his name has a lisp.

Unsurprised

I wonder if the sequel acknowledges that The 1% were all (justly) blown up at the end of Kingsmen along with the heads (heh) of every national government.

Romonobyl

That was the part that ruined it for me. Soundtrack was pretty damned good though!

Unsurprised

Of the first or second movie? Because that was the only thing that made watching the first one at all worth it for me.

laserguru

Hey Horatio,

I’m hammered!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

H.O.T.S.?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Nah. Hardcore, cus John Holmes is there.

ballsofsteelandfury

even better

Unsurprised

“Who ordered the hot AIDS injection?”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
ballsofsteelandfury

Nice costume design!

Brick Meathook

OK, end of the OSU TT game, lets change channels, whats on ESPN?

Oh my

OK on to ESPN2

Brick Meathook

Actually, I think I’m gonna keep watching Alabama just to see how many points they score.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook

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.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

Boy toys

Beastmode Ate My Baby

How are you, Unsurprised?

Unsurprised

Okay. You?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Purty good! BTW, yer gonna be back in HRTN this-coming month.

Unsurprised

Sweet! Do I get sucked into the future through the Modern Day In & Out / Future Iguana Mart, which I presume is also the Nexus of All Realities?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Hmmm….that’s not bad idea…

Unsurprised

Of course not. I’m a genius.

litre_cola

Isnt he hanging by his arms with us Canucks?

Unsurprised

I think I am upside-down over a vat.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

You guys are together. With AGS.

Bwahahahaha!

Unsurprised

But at least I’m not about to murder Peter King anymore.

Conversely, I can’t murder Peter King anymore.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Wait, what?”

– Eli Manning

theeWeeBabySeamus

“Wait, what?”

– Aaron Rodgers

Brick Meathook

Wow look at that fat old referee in the Oklahoma St game. He’s gonna die.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Redshirt

I’m on mute, so I’m imagining the heavy labored breathing when he speaks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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“Well, maybe so, but he sure gives a relaxing shoulder rub.”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly