You know, the good kind of travesty whereby extraordinary misfortune befalls the easily-hateable team that has experienced so much success. The one that has had the benefit of iffy ref calls for more than a decade now. The team that has an owner that has more than doubled his significant wealth due to the hiring of a coach and the drafting of a certain qb in the sixth round on a bit of a flyer.
Yeah, that team. The one that has fans that couldn’t tell you who Steve Grogan or Andre Tippett is/was. They don’t even acknowledge the Super Bowl that Parcells took them to. “Affient bistory”, they say in their drunken, garbled tongue. That’s the fan base that doesn’t acknowledge players that have been cast aside and have ended up on other teams. “They didn’t play THE PATRIOT WAY-I hope they took the first segregated bus out of town after they was cut!”, they screech.
It’s the team that has bent the rules as far as they’ll go and have only been punished a handful of times. Logic dictates to me that they’ve been able to squash a few revealments of other wrong-doings with a wadful of cash here and a plutonium tea there. “Oh, that assistant strength coach that was booted out of the Boy Scouts for reasons unknown? His steroids weren’t replaced by insulin. No sir!”* [runs out of breath]
TO… THEGAME! [wheezes]
KC/NE:
Do what you do, Patreek Le Freek.
And you guys can do what you do as well
*may not have occurred but I’m not ruling it out completely
They should only play 6 innings to get playoff baseball games under 4 hours.
There’s Al taking the Gaping Hole baton from Collinsworth.
Guys, I think KC might have a bad defense.
Has there ever been a KC team with a solid offense that didn’t give up 50 every playoff game?
No idea. For mental health reasons, I don’t follow them that closely.
They are stretched out.
Balls’ ears perk up.
Btw, per the intro hate on this post, every once in a while I just think “Tony Eason” and laugh a little. It helps brighten the day.
That would be an excellent Halloween costume
Bond chick outfits have improved considerably since “Dr. No”
“Dr, No”? Was that the Bill Cosby biopic?
Title came from his failure at his doctoral thesis defense. There was just one question: “What do you do if she says ‘no’?” He fucked it up.
Checking back in after sulking post bears game. Should I be watching this one?
I will pay good money for Collinsworth to never again say the phrase “Look at the gaping hole.” Ever.
He loves that porn genre so we’ll just have to kill him.
Ever met his wife? I bet he started saying that as soon as they started dating.
That’s why he has to strap that 2×4 on.
On the right. Looks like she got the bolt ons out since the last time I saw her.
Al; “UUUUUUGE gash up the middle.”
Al just said it too! It’s spreading!
Well, I’ve had enough of this snuff film.
Later, Taters!
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
That’s some Better Mahomes and Garden
Moses Malone tits
A double triple is from that Mars movie…..
Mars Attucks, where abolitionist work to rid space of slavery? I love that one!
So CROSE.
I’d try her secret menu
False advertising. Those aren’t doubles at all.
I thought Offensive Pass Interference was when you said an ethnic slur in the wideout’s ear!
Did I just hear NBC correctly? The NFL just said Offensive Pass Interference is now legal?
It don’t excuse the Bengals running a 11-0-0 defense but that’s a bit disconcerning.
It’s not offensive pass interference when the DB stands in the way of the receiver running a route and extends his arms. The receiver is allowed to attempt separation.
Okay good. I misheard but in today’s NFL you never know.
I saw they circled on the broadcast, but it looked okay to me. Away from the play and the DB wasn’t attempting to cover Brown.
I know it will be a topic of conversation in every Skyline for years to come, but they did get the right call.
That was a clean game. Cincinnati players doesn’t have anything to feel sorry about.
Bengals offense did their job by answering the bell and scoring the TD The defense gave it up but they emptied their bench for reserves because players were dropping like flies.. Cincinnati coaches on the other hand lost that game easily.
Gronk gonna start running with a lance
It was the Red Rover defense.
I hate everything.
Okay I’m back from Cedar Point. It sucked because they invited the entire population of Lower Michigan and half of everything broke down. The Bengals lost because half the defense finished the game in the Infirmary and the coaching really screwed the pooch (Cover 0 against Antonio Brown, abandoning the running game by pregame), but today won’t be completely bad as long as the Bengals next opponent, Kansas City, isn’t getting embarrassed by being humbled and bitch-slapped on national TV so they won’t go into next week’s game in Full Power Revenge Mode.
(turns on TV)
Of course.
I didn’t receive my invite. NAWT FAIR
I asked everyone who was in the car. You didn’t speak up!
Cedar Point is on my destination list. Seriously.
I’m a coaster freak.
Get any rides in?
Cedar Point’s coasters are fucking amazing.
They certainly keep the beer rings off the coffee table!
I’m down the freeway from Magic Mountain.
Always looking for a new coaster.
Please visit and ride X2 and Tatsu and have your life altered.
An unexpected side effect of losing a ton of weight has been an urgent desire to get back into amusement parks while I still fit comfortably
As someone who’s lost a bill plus, having the safety bar click into place and allowing you to ride is a nice affirmation.
I remember a few years back buying one of the wristbands for the fireworks festival carnival thing here and not being able to fit on most of the rides with the boy, and being equal parts embarrassed and angry at wasting the money on it, so this summer was all about “Fuck you, I’m going on a merry go round and sitting on a horsey because I CAN”
Iron Dragon
Cedar Creek Mine Ride
Rougarou
Top Thrill Dragster
Skyhawk
Steel Vengeance, Maverick and Magnum XL-200 were all down. Plus it took two hours to get food.
Rock Star!
Ever been to Put-In-Bay? Loved it there, and would love to get back as soon as possible.
The real question though is if the bay put out later that night.
I knew I was setting that up for a cheap joke.
THIS GUY BILL BELICHICK I CALL HIM THE ROCKEFELLER LAWS BECAUSE HE SETS BLACK SIGNAL CALLERS BACK 40 YEARS
“THIS GUY BILL BELICHICK I CALL HIM HURRICANE MICHAEL CAUSE HE IS DESTROYING MAHOMES!” – wealthy Florida landowner
also he makes a bunch of overly tanned cougars really moist
AMERICAN STEROID WARRIORS
I own an “American Ganja Warrior” shirt.
Deadspin could make BANK selling American Kinja Warrior t-shirts…
Or they could stick the ad in between a shitty Billy Haisley article and something Laura Wagner saw on another site first.
Where would you fit the advertisement with all the Amazon whoring?
Funny enough, because of the UBlock plugin on Chrome, I basically have never seen an ad on there when browsing on desktop.
It was raunchy on mobile, even on my RSS Reader.
They make sure to make up for it if I go anywhere near it on my phone
Also, make sure you get uBlock Origin Extra as well. It takes care of some of the shenanigans Chrome tries to pull with bypassing ad blockers on its own.
Yes – I’ve been doing that since Day 1 as well. Plus my VPN has its own adblocking service as well.
All right, Ted Kaczynski relax
Ah, VPN. Paying someone to hide your traffic data from the cable company so they can hoard it instead.
this game tastes like raw frisee
good night and FUCK EVERYTHING IN THE FUCKHOLE.
See, they didn’t need Butler in that Superbowl.
LOL EAT SHIT ROOKIE
The fucking devil himself
ok, get a TD and MAYBE it ain’t quite over
Mahomes-y don’t play that!
well-played
DON’T LOOK TO THE SIDELINE! YOU KNOW HOW TIME FUCKING WORKS!!
Math don’t work at night!
How the fuck does Andy Reid have 3 TOs with 39 seconds remaining?
Because it’s… Andy Reid?
Why did it have to be the goddamn Pats who make Mahomes look average?
until right there
/PLEASE BE HARBINGER NOT ABERRATION
BECAUSE YOUAH ROOMS ARE NOT PAINTED WITH SOIL FROM FOXBORO STADIUM
How naive are you to expect different?
hmmm, going to bed at halftime and succumbing to nightmares seems a fine idea.
AT LEAST MICHEL IS SLAUGHTERING MAESTRO IN DFO-ball 😀
At least he’s proving useful in my CFL Twitter fantasy league!
#DeepCuts
THANK YOU, MY LARGE ADULT SON-Y MICHEL
Can’t figure out how to make a basedball joke about “Benintendi’d consequences” and it’s TEARING ME APART.
THIS GUY HERODOTUS450 I CALL HIM TOMMY WISEAU BECAUSE I’M NOT ENTIRELY CONVINCED HE’S ACTUALLY FEELING TORN APART.
#20 acting like he made a good play there instead of committing blatant pass interference truly cracked me up.
that’s some smelly home cooking right there
Man oh man would a Cuba libre taste good right about now.
“Uh, I think Obama already did that, sir.”
I like this White guy as a RB. – a Venn diagram of Pats fans, Woostah residents, and red Dem voters that is a perfect circle
I like the Asian kid Sony too though
Watching two teams I hate play and seeing who I instinctively root for is always an excellent way to test what my true feelings are.
Verdict: I really, really, really hate the Chiefs.
Yinzburgh is now on P*ts circle of hell for me.
Cause of today?
I’ll take wagers at +410 ML that it’s because of a bet he fucked up.
on top of all season with the blatantly anti-labour Company Man bullshit re Le’Veon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3N0aVHshTg
We’re getting there
not fast enough
How’s it going, kiddos? Redshirt commit seppuku?
I’ve been breaking glass in your room again
So that’s where it came from.
Glad to see you ’round these parts again, regardless.
Do your worst. (That’s the bloated corpse of Rupert Murdoch on the right, btw.)
How is the ol’ double J somehow the most morally righteous person in this photo? Yikes.
This photo needs Ronaldo in it before it is truly complete.
Khabib couldn’t wait until that very moment to strike?
I want to punch everyone in this photo.
I can’t decide which first.
Probably not Conor. The other two are less spry.
Yeah, but gotta take him out first I think. Then you have time to choke the other two out and watch the life drain from their eyes.
Wow, that was dark, even for me.
I feel like it’s a leap of faith to say there’s any left in their eyes to begin with
I rubbed my screen trying to get rid of that picture and it turns out it’s a douche scratch-n-sniff
What kind of Lemon Party is this?
The Ghosts of Regrettable Fucks Past and Present
I have no proof but I like to think that McGreggor has on over priced cowboy boots the EXACT same color as his pocket square. Because, Tixassssss …
That was very displeasing.
‘Sup, fuckers. Just finished rehearsal. All is well, I see. HAIL BLEERGH.
Your chamber group?
No! New project, actually – playing double bass for a folk singer next weekend – he writes songs all about local history and key figures, events, etc.
You play double bass? So what you’re saying is we need an excuse to play string quintets/Trout although there’ll be a whole lot of travel involved?
/Unless it’s jazz double bass in which case, uh, we’ll think of something
It’s jazz double bass. I am a heathen. Never trust a wind player.
Mahomes kind of looks like a beefier Steph Curry, even chewing on the mouthpiece…
At least I don’t have to listen to Joe Buck call the ALCS games.
Exactly. I actually like this crew. Solid play by play and Darling is just fine as an analyst.
There’s been some incredible running today. Saw the Chargers with Gordon then the Rams with Gurley.
Love the running game.
And Latavius had a damn good day too.
Gordon & Gurley were like twin shotgun blasts to the nuts. I hate fantasy football.
Some good, good secondary play from the shitheads in KC right there
SIGH. At least it was the right honky.
what the hell was that
God, Dreamboat ALMOST got murdered.
I’m assuming EVERYONE has muted their teevee boxes now, as I did after the pickerception. Rarely is the SNF I make it to the end of Q1 with audio.
It’s fine until Chris starts his incessant screeching.
So, pre-game?
Dude, I’ve had muzak thru the headphones and TV muted since the pre-game started.
Why, what’d I miss?
Haven’t heard a peep of NBC because I’m listening to Cowboys post-game on local sprots-talk radio stream.
/dodges unmentionable filth lauched at head
Did Elliot dive at you? Did you sass him?
Time for some beef stew!
– Andy Reid’s PDA, every fifteen minutes
Mahomes looks like me playing Madden: pressing pass for too long when I don’t need a laser pass, and just totally forgetting about the dozen other controls I could be using.