Your “Get Off My Damn Lawn!” Saturday Evening Open Thread

It’s 4/20 this weekend, and this shit is being played live withing listening distance of my house:

As has been established, I’m a drinker, not a toker,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVmNpRPoRaE

so, I’ve fucked off to my brother’s in Seattle, with the good scotch. Hope y’all are having a good long weekend.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Jets at Blues – 7:00PM | NBCSN / CBC / Sportsnet
    • Hurricanes at Capitals – 8:00PM | NBC / Sportsnet1
  • NBA:
    • Bucks at Pistons – 8:00PM | ESPN / TSN
    • Rockets at Jazz – 10:30PM | ESPN / TSN
  • MLB:
    • Dodgers at Brewers – 7:00PM | FS1
  • MLS:
    • Toronto FC vs. Minnesota – 8:00PM | TSN2
    • Orlando vs. Whitecaps FC – 10:00PM | TSN2

I’m coming home Sunday afternoon, too late to help clean; just in time for family dinner. THE PERFECT CRIME!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Unsurprised

h

ttps://giant.gfycat.com/SpectacularImmediateHectorsdolphin.mp4

Unsurprised

I just saw this joke and nearly passed out from laughing so hard.

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Unsurprised

The Angie Varona photos are the most recent. There are 13. Breaking up the link for NSFW and other reasons.

h

ttp://www.image-bugs.com/j3scribe

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This wedding sucked

Unsurprised

They all do.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

– Robert Stark

ALXMAC
ALXMAC
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

I am higher than Walter Cronkite.

Mr. Ayo

And that’s the way it is.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

It’s kind of funny Angie Varona grew up to become a lawyer but is also still an instathot. Ah, Florida.

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Mr. Ayo

I’d allow her to adjudicate my groin.

Senor Weaselo

She did? Good for—I mean, I HAVE NO IDEA WHO THAT IS.

yeah right
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Okay so I’ve decided I won’t be working out tomorrow, which clears me to drink to excess tonight. Not sure I will, but it’s on the menu.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Man, that pizza was good…

Mr. Ayo

But not as good as the payment method?

Unsurprised

RTD has the fastest hands in the west after Lindsey Vonn.

WCS

Oh, God. He’s going to smash it in a pill-induced meltdown after the Clots lose to miss the playoffs next season.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

/TOM BRADY CUMS. HARD.

WCS

I KNEW there was a joke to make about that, but, I’m at my sister-in-laws, and for some backwards thinking, I volunteered to watch the kids, and I just didn’t have time to figure one out.
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Unsurprised

This is why all the best comedians are pathetic losers and loners with serious mental problems. I’m made of time.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

They have talent.

Unsurprised

Pfft. Talent.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The guy in that gif is how I would expect the Patrician from the Discworld series to look if he wore modern suits.

Unsurprised

That’s probably intentional. He’s Leonardo Leonardo from the Clerks cartoon, voiced by Alec Baldwin.