Fair warning: You’re not getting much out of me tonight.
We’ve been dealing with hurricane stuff around here.
I drove down in the middle of it overnight last night to get a friend’s daughter to safety.
(I know what you’re thinking)
((don’t say it please))
–
In today’s version of “That was unexpected”….
Both the former tWLS and Asia reached out to me to find out if the hurricane had killt me. Now granted, I don’t know for sure which answer they would have preferred. But it was nice to know they were thinking of me, even if they just wanted me ded.
But sorry girls, it ain’t got me yet.
(I am totally joking, both seemed very concerned and were very nice)
Then after Dave and myself went driving through a hurricane last night, I came home and slept a lot. Then woke up 15 minutes ago and realized I still had to write some stupid shit for you asshats. So, here we go.
–
Sports To Blow You Away 2Nite
Tennis
- 2019 US Open: Men’s Semis (hehehe) – All night but no idea who is playing – TV: ESPN
MLB
- NYY @ Boston – 7:00pmEDT – TV: MLBN (regional split)
- Toronto @ Tampa Bay – 7:00pmEDT – TV: MLBN (regional split)
NCAA Football
- Wake Forest @ Rice – 8:00pmEDT – TV:CBSSN
- Marshall @ Boise State – 9:00pmEDT – TV: ESPN2
Orrrrrr….you can watch a rerun of last night’s Packers/Bears game on NFLN
(to each his own)
–
OK, Let’s Blow Through Some Cheerleaders (so to speak)
Last week we did college girls. Hehehehe
This week, it’s the pros.
Enjoy….
And still, for three years now, still the best NFL Cheerleader in EVAR!!!!!!!!
(yes we like her)
She’s Yummy. And if you disagree, I’ll fight ya.
(After I wake up)
Have a nice weekend everyone.
Love ya’s.
–
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcY3FH208l8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyf0ZIh3SVo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDujDj1CxIs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NoMhesT5EEk
LUSTS IN MEXICAN
She’s purty.
Am I about to watch the Yanet Garcia movie just to see if there are any gifs worth making?
Yes, I am, Other Unsurprised.
(I need a life.)
4:14. Yep.
Sorry I’m late.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EgB__YratE
There’s a documentary about DS9? Weird.
Duuuude. Once Upon A Time In Hollywood is so good.
Welp, this sucks… I got me the first ticket (to be fair, I was speeding a tiny bit so mea culpa) in 11 years thanks to the always awesome Gardai, so here’s an apt song from me, mwahaha(ish?)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AL8chWFuM-s
And one from the West Coast.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMnaa__JZbU
Our next request comes from a Mr. BFC in Culver City.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNLXmZpHn88
First quarter of GWS-Western in the books. Some thoughts:
Man this game is more physical than I expected
Scoring efficiency remains a major issue. This isn’t Penn State, minor scores won’t make the valley happy.
Toby Greene in the ruck? Ok.
Nick Haynes and Jeremy Finlayson don’t look 100%, but there might be enough talent for that not to stop GWS
I can’t stay up for much more of this game.
I said the first quarter was physical…and then three different players came off the field bleeding within the first two minutes of the second quarter.
Yeah, that’s perfect. One of the most goth songs ever was prefaced by a Reese’s Peanutbutter Cup viddy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWZFa7W-kkY
“Got a music or a food request? Send it along! Our outsourced phone answewrer will be only too glad to take your improvements.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LL_U5GSUBpw
Surf’s up!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHww_HJt1qk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acYAFerWhVw
Speaking of high towers and Texas heroes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlBuoBV-Sa0
SPOILER: Charles Whitman was finally killed by Austin police officer Houston McCoy. The only way that name could be more Texan is if he was called Houston “Tex” McCoy.
Who later died as a backup quarterback to the Washington [redacteds]
“KDFO Radio play on. This one goes out to a Senor Balls in Pasadena California.
KDFO for when the rest of the stations play shit.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4Z3yhbGFGE
“KDFO Request Line, we’ve got a caller from Daggett California who says he’s finally found his one true love in the Three C’s Tavern. I wish him nothing but the best.”
{ warning: long intro}
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHclFboVd5E
I warned you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poeTZPimOo0
So tired of this Stalin book. There’s an anecdote about an aircraft engineer that was blamed for planes crashing. He stood his ground, told his higher-ups what the real issue was but ended up being arrested and beaten regularly. After some time it’s discovered that the engineer is correct and he is released.
Stalin introduces him to his new boss, who happens to be Lavrent Beria, the guy that tortured him! Stalin’s comment is along the lines of, “I believe you two have met before”. Surreal.
It’s a book on Stalin.
There’s no happy ending.
“Why not?”
–Robert K., Foxboro
Well, Stalin does die.
Hey there folks!
It’s Goth Friday!
Reallyy…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-RVJyNpfDk
Fuck it!
What’s up motherfuckers?!?
I love this tune. I should have dropped my girlie at the time and went out with her friend that introduced me to this. We had so much more in common with each other. The friend ended up as an architect and the girlie fucked her way right to the top of a small tech company.
/The End
Goth don’t lie
Every time I think about visiting Coastal Carolina you talk me out of it.
I’m beginning to think this relationship is going nowhere!
Holy crap, Rocko’s Modern Life is fucking deranged. How was this show marketed for children?
In contrast to Ren and Stimpy?
Cut it off.
— Lorena Bobbit
There’s a party on the (tiny) roofdeck of our apartment tonight. When can I be cranky and tell them to shut up?
After your burrito.
Mine is bad; you have a hard time getting cranky after a delicious burrito.
After you’ve gone up and drank all their liquor?
Why can’t we hibernate? Why is that just for bears and the Bears’ offense?
Very few days where I don’t regret getting out of bed in the morning.
/no Lesser Footy tomorrow, watch my asshole brain wake me up anyway
ah do needs a haircut
/will be my 9/11 present to myself
No footy? International play though?
Yes, but not until noon.
Central time?
England/Bulgaria seems to be the best of a lousy slate.
Hippo, would you play Ridley vs. Minny, Kirk vs. Lions or Sutton vs. Raiders?
If Julio is really messed up, Ridley for all the marbles
I benched Ridley in DFO ball (though I keep going back and forth between Sterling Shepard and Michael Gallup. Think I may lean Sutton here.
From the inbox:
No players on Bleached Assholes are listed on the week 1 NFL injury report.
which is tWBS in this festive GIF?
The one the girls aren’t fighting over?
OH COME ON!!!!
Besides, I’m out of frame running the hell away.
Ain’t no girl gon’ beat me up. At least not if I see her in time.
Dude by the name of Hightower runs it in for Boise.
“This score is dedicated to my hero Charles Whitman. One day I hope to score as much as he did.”
She caught you looking but she ain’t care. Also, Hightower, Charles Whitman? Bueller? Smoot-Hawley Tariff? Anyone?
No, your are on a ship in rough sees…..
Those are at least DD’s and they are very smooth.
That is one dizzy midget.
(there’s a sentence I never expected to say)
….Your sees.
Having second thoughts about my betting strategy on this fight, as the overweight guy seems determined to exhaust the other guy by stopping all his punches with his forehead.
Also the guy who made weight is Cuban. Probably should have looked into that before making my imaginary bet.
Doesn’t the other guy have to waive the weigh-in rule?
If so, wouldn’t you put your money on the guy who’s either confident enough or money-hungry enough to say “fuck it, bring on fatty.”
Cuban just won by 2nd round TKO.
And for the record I would never bet on boxing. You might as well put your money on a pro wrestling match for all the credibility boxing has.
“Ric Flair won again!? Welp, I’ll just double down next time; Flair’s gotta lose sometime!”
Like the Washington Generals. They’re due!
always bet on the black(er) guy
Boise scores with uptempo offense. It’s like the opposite what the Bears did last night.
Drinking one of these courtesy of the gracious Makeitsnow.
Really good, but so rich that it becomes almost too much. A great dessert beer, but probably the only one of the night as it’s wrecked the tastebuds for anything else.
Weldwerks is fantastic
if the next scene isn’t a jump cut to a plane landing on an airstrip labeled “Panama” I will be sorely disappointed.
Probably yelling at Charlie Sheen to get off her lawn before she calls the cops on him for violating another restraining order.
He can’t hear anything-he’s stuffed chipmunks in each ear.
OK, for some reason that is making me laugh my ass off.
You’re high
Watching a boxing match. Think I’ll put my money on the guy that missed the weigh-in limit by 4.6 lbs. He clearly didn’t exhaust himself trying to satisfy technicalities like “legal weight limits” and shit like that.
We get the local Worcester MA public access channel for some reason, and they’re running highlights from their 10 college football team
Ana Maria v. Becker. Finally found a game Hippo didn’t put money on.
You sure about that?
Not even a little bit.
Lick it Up by Kiss should be playing in the background.
Stupid puppy