If the London Game had been an early morning affair, yes, I get it. I’d be totally fine with that. But this is ‘our’ NFL, giving us the illusion of choice when there is in fact none or the choices are garbage. (borrowed from that old crank George Carlinski) Why do we put up with this? Or do we? I guess the league’s Downward Dog numbers indicate that we don’t. I mean, not ‘us’, us. We’ll watch a shit game and ask for more so that we can come on here and try to make one another larf their butts off. It’s a pitiful existence, but what else is there?
TO THE GAME!
Broncos/Chargers:
It’s fade time for Courtland Sutton again because he’ll be getting a big, fat dose of Casey Hayward. Not so for Manny though-the gap between the aforementioned cb and the rest of the Chargers is calculated in light years. But will Flacco go for it? He’d better because Denver is staring at going 0-5 for the very first time in ever.
Packers/Cowboys:
Speaking of lockdown dudes, Green Bay’s Jaire Alexander is PFF’s top ranked cb and he’ll be showcasing his wares against Amari today. You might think twice about starting rb Jones this week as he’s had just the one game with over 40 yardos rushing but his arch-nemesis, (not including Matt LaFleur) Jamaal Williams is out this week. ‘Increased touches lead to increased chances’ is what I whisper to my sixteen year old kid from the closet of his bedroom when he has a girlie over but it also holds true in fantasy football.
Get your engines revving, sportsters!
Where the fuck did this Packer defense come from?
Mostly Obergefell v Hodges, 2015.
1868
“But aren’t you afraid this proposed amendment could be used to allow for gay people to be married?”
“What are you talking about? Why shouldn’t happy people not be allowed to be married?”
Sup bitches
watching the Cowboys suck ass. you?
Drinking and watching the same!
Watching the newest director’s cut of Brokeback Mountain?
“America’s game”
“Lindsay’s taking a pounding.”
– Vlad Putin, watching video from the Moscow Hilton, room 214.
So NBA preseason has started.
coop took a shoulder to the knee. Not great.
Fantasy tip: start Jones today!
Running some quick numbers here, and it turns out Jets > Cowboys
Well, yeah, if you mean the Winnipeg Jets
Not sure if it’s the Packers or Cowboys having a statement game
The very last of my homemade pickled jalapenos died today, in glorious service to nachos.
I’m making more. They were delicious.
oh my jesus fuck
https://twitter.com/420beachdad/status/1180899474333474817
Yo this guy is fuckin’ dead. Like, for real.
Fortunately, the crowd seemed well verse in the medical theory of letting him sleep it off
Its amazing watching Natural Selection in action.
Did I just watch a snuff tweet?
He landed on his head …nothing of value was lost …
It was padded by the alcohol
The sidewalk stopped his fall.
The Bears Lost?
The Bears lost. According to PFF and Football Outsiders, they weren’t smarter than the average.
Yeah, that’s my ass in the suicide league.
Fucking Bears.
– Timothy Treadwell
My main takeaway going into the Cowboys bye week is that the defense is pretty good for a change but the O-line is nowhere near what it used to be and as a result they’re 10-6/11-5, (only because the NFC just isn’t that good overall), but nowhere near good enough to threaten for anything more than NFC East “Champs”
Take a look at the precious Spanos family that can’t be seen because they’re behind bullet-proof glass.
Enough time for another Dak pick!
of course
These Packers players only drink 1% milk?
“Hold on you mean there’s special milk for us?”
-George W. B.
“I specifically asked for homogenized milk.” — Aaron R.
Second Clippers du Merde double-hold BLEERGH.
Double J should meet with Lincoln Riley while he’s in town.
“Last time a Lincoln tried to mess with the South he didn’t live to see the end of it, ya hear?”
Bill Bidwill was so cheap that he used his personal number as the line for phone ins on Cardinal Talk. Now he’s dead and fans can’t get on the air to praise the team for their only win of the year.
Alright Cowboys….do something. Get a TD, throw an INT. shit on the field, club Rodgers in the head.
SOMETHING
I thought GB should have gone for that on 4th down.
because they should have
Finally Dallas D holds.
They’ve been holding most of the game but it usually isn’t called when they’re playing at home.
“We’ve got more than 3,500 people on hold right now!
-Verizon Half-Time Report
the NFC is a fucking joke
Currently 11 NFC teams with winning records right now all feasting on the dregs of the league and all equally bad/good otherwise
A touchback? Now you’re just adding insult to injury here. At least there’s no fans in attendance to see it?
If you’re going to get a flag for hitting Rodgers, make it count.
D-O-N-K-S!!!!!!!
Ellen DeGeneres out there having a good ol’ time with W as though his followers weren’t basically protesting her very existence in 1997 and that he didn’t actively work to prevent her from having equal rights serves as a fine reminder that you can’t ever trust hollywood liberal types.
Sorry about that 2004 campaign, heh (90% based on homophobia)
Obviously the reason that Bush never passed a Constitutional Amendment banning gay marriage and abortion was because of Obummer!
but money? Dont you care about money?
[blows whistle]
“Ten yard penalty, loss of down for ridiculous generalization.”
I fucking hate football.
found a funny:
date: can you take off your work gloves
Jim Henson: they have names
Seeing how ARI is definitely going with “building for the future”, any team that isn’t trying to trade for Patrick PEDerson while Keim is on his post-win bender is negligent.
So Ellen comes to see Rodgers play?
Hey Bush, why dont you come out against Trump?
Why would he?
He hasn’t killed nearly enough civilians to earn W’s favor
he has some dickass nephew still trying to have a GOP political career. And fuckwad dynasty families like that always put such concerns ahead of trivial matters like preserving the goddamned Republic
They got enough money to be comfortable in USA2: Real America.
Wouldn’t do much good. The crash-and-burn that was the Jeb! campaign shows how much credibility the Bush name has with Republican voters. (I’m sure it still has weight with the money guys.)
One advantage that Trump had in the Republican primary was that he didn’t feel obligated to defend W’s record, he even went ahead and trashed the Iraq War as a mistake (lying about the fact that he supported it at the time).
Lookit the war criminals
What’s more Cardinals than getting your sole win of the season…and then the phone lines are down for your team call in post game show?
If there’s a hell, I think it would just be an eternity of waiting for food to cool down after cooking it.
That looked like a throw. But if its upheld. LOL
NFL Galaxy Brain: What is a throw?
I love the argument from the Racist Republican Party is, “Trump is looking into corruption and no one is reporting the truth so people are confused and can’t understand how simple this all is.”
Also, on Trump asking China to interfere at one of his pseudo-pressers, “He was just baiting the press to see what you’d all do to react!”
I dunno — if people were so confused that I might lose my position as unindictable while being a career criminal, I think I’d maybe not “bait the press” on the issue on which people were confused. But what do I know? I’ve never been President OR fucked my own ugly daughters — which is why evangelicals will never worship me.
/bait presented to press
[press sniffs bait]
[press quickly walks away from bait, knowing that if they acted on the bait they wouldn’t be able to ask empty, meaningless questions to the President]
that is FUMBRE
That was a limp dick throw
fuck that, if two guys hold, should go back 20
The idea of a holdkakke costing a team 40 or 50 yards in one go is hilarious
Really enjoying how the vast majority of the Carson crowd is Donks fans, despite our being 0-4 and generally fucking hopeless.
Cowboys absolutely fucking sucking the biggest shit in a home game? Man, you hate to see it…
RUN THE FUCKING BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jesus! WTF Was Dak doing?
DAKTASTROPHE
thats a hold?
Romo is so much more entertaining than Aikman. I guess he’s still being punished for those playoff losses.
Double J care to issue a Bounty on Rodgers?
BITCH, you can use Bounty to clean the jism off your back!
lol kickers suck