Your Buffalo/Houston Wild Card Game Open Thread

And all that work in the regular season to eliminate all those lousy teams except for the Eagles, smgdh. Hey, we’re here-let’s make the best of it.

TO THE GAME!

Bills/Texans:

-J.J. Watt is back! The usual recovery time from a torn pec is six months + (depending on severity of course) but he’s a Wonder Warrior and all that. I’m guessing he’s not in game shape but he’ll have an impact because Josh Allen reacts very slowly to collapsing pockets.

-There’ll be an interesting battle between wr Hopkins (68 of his catches have gone for a 1st down or a TD-that’s phenomenal!) and cb White, the Bills shutdown (over-used word but the guy hasn’t given up a TD the whole season) dude. So The Shaun will throw to the other side, right? Welp, it looks as though deepball fella Fuller’s continuing soft tissue ailments will cause him to miss out this week. So we’re looking at the very average Kenny Stills going up against Levi Wallace who, after a rough start to the year, has only given up 7 catches the last four weeks.

-Devin Singletary should have himself a game in this spot. He really underwhelmed the last 3 games he played in (he was supposed to help deliver me a champeenship) but I went back and had a look-they were vs. the Pats, Ravens and Steelers, all top 5 in defending the run. The Texans are in the bottom 5 in that category.

-Prediction Time! If Josh Allen keeps it to two turnovers or less the Bills win, more than that and things get dicey. I’ll say Bills 26 (that’s 2 scores and 4 field goals because multiple busted drives) Texans 20.

Now it’s your turn. Tell me how you think the game will unfold.

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Mistborn Impossible

Well next week will have more entertainment value if the Bills win. Allen has been hilarious today

King Hippo

Buffalo needs to hand off now.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Or let John Brown throw again

King Hippo

Holy cats, TheShaun!!

JustStopDude

Can a playoff game end in a tie?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Did Josh Allen steal Fells’s jersey?

Doktor Zymm

I don’t want the Texans to score because I want to continue my observations of Josh Allen’s descent into madness

Viva La Tabula Raza

You can watch a descent into madness every day, just follow the news out of Washington DC.

Bortleback

Tunsil needs something to make him less jittery

WCS

A gasmask bong?

Game Time Decision

I read the name as turnstile

Bortleback

A turnstile probably wouldn’t false start as much?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Must say that this turned out to be more exciting than the first half would have indicated.

The Maestro

One way or another, this game will eventually end. But Josh Allen’s existential anguish will remain eternal.

King Hippo

NOBODY BUT JJ WATT COULD HAVE WON THAT TOSS NO DAYS OFF!!!!!1111

Viva La Tabula Raza

BOX JUMP SOME MORE!!!

Old School Zero

Allen: /swats coin towards the sideline

Senor Weaselo

“There must be a winner to the game.”
“I told you!” -Donovan McNabb

Gratliff

“There must be a winner to the game,” he says, resignedly.

King Hippo

True story – before Tom O’Brien brought him in from Middlebury College as a grad transfer, Hauschka was gonna go to dental school.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

He knows how to drill it then

Senor Weaselo

The only way this game gets weirder is if someone turns into a rhinoceros.

Old School Zero

Josh Allen: lifetime member of the Looks Like Create-A-Player Default club

Viva La Tabula Raza

That guy’s name is Bojorquez. Is he some kind of Boris Johnson/Spaniard hybrid?

Bortleback

The lack of doink must be a setup for an overtime wide right

Game Time Decision

Playoff OT safety, for the win, pls, don’t care who

Senor Weaselo

Look at Stephen Hauschka, thinking he’s still the Seahawks kicker.

Doktor Zymm

OT – JOSH ALLEN’S TRAUMA CONTINUES

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Best chance for the bills to win is if they run back a kick or turnover.

King Hippo

QUASI-PLAYOFF SCORIGAMI ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED

Petronel

NO DOINK

JustStopDude

The trek….continues….

Doktor Zymm

Josh Allen will have no memory of this in the morning

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Are they icing Hauschka or my bladder?

Mr. Ayo

47 yards you say? Hmmmmmm…

Viva La Tabula Raza

Shank’lor nudges Scott Norwood, “Hey, watch this.”

Senor Weaselo

Norwood reference, start drinking!

Game Time Decision

That’s a chug

Old School Zero

All that just to tie

Gratliff

Triple doink incoming

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This team is less prepared to win that I was to please a woman in high school

King Hippo

uh, go ahead and kick please

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I have had to pee the last 30 minutes

Game Time Decision

Drip

Game Time Decision

Drip

Game Time Decision

Drip

JustStopDude

Rookie mistake….that is what empties are for…

Old School Zero

Did someone hide the key to the cock cage again?

Viva La Tabula Raza

I haven’t put away the hospital style pee jugs from my post-op yet, so I’m good.

King Hippo

sneak it to middle of field and spike

JustStopDude

Do you really want this offense coming back out?

Senor Weaselo

The punter with the spike. Amazing.

King Hippo

a show with everything but Yul Brenner

Mr. Ayo

1st down? The fuck?

Mr. Ayo

TAKE. THAT. SACK.

King Hippo

WAY TO GO PUNTER!!

JustStopDude

At this point, I had more faith in him spiking it that Josh Allen…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Well at least that guy got to take a snap

Doktor Zymm

In the Hausch?

Gratliff

lol what

King Hippo

Good call by McDermott being realistic about the situation.

King Hippo

I says FIRST DOWN

BrettFavresColonoscopy

If this is a decision from the Shield….touchdown, Seahawks

Gratliff

We getting a tony romo memorial 4th down spike?

Old School Zero

Playoff football so high caliber it would drown in an inch of water

Doktor Zymm

Allen has terrified eyes

Game Time Decision

He can see the ghosts

Senor Weaselo

He’s short so I look forward to the spike.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

On fourth down?

Mr. Ayo

The Bills!

Senor Weaselo

Exactly.