The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem
Feared conqueror; scholar; poet; revered holy man; professional raconteur; soldier of fortune; aloof yet thorough lover; bandit; blazing gypsy speedboat. I have been called some of these things.
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scotchnaut

Game threado is up yo.

scotchnaut

/watching “Enough” starring Jen Lopez. Her big butt? As per the rules, it did not lie.

yeah right

Current forecast 63 mostly sunny. Chance of grilling 100%

Beers engaged.

LemonJello

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SonOfSpam

I read that as “bears engorged” and I wondered what kinda bar you were at.

Happy fucking SBS.

Unsurprised

Buddy’s bar

Senor Weaselo
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

71 HERE! HA.

scotchnaut

“Hi there. A bunch of us love stories about zombies slowly chasing people.”

-the viewing public in the US.

Old School Zero

Hello from Newark International Airport and also fuck humanity in general

SonOfSpam

Ew.

Or, Ewr, to be more accurate.

blaxabbath

Newark will do that to ya

Old School Zero

It’s like a Vegas hotel on a diminished budget and worse food

scotchnaut

Yeah, I get it. Your arms are tired. That shouldn’t influence your opinion of us.

Unsurprised

All the shitting on Kobe, mostly the especially mean-spirited and stupid shit from white women, has made me like him after twenty years of, at best, thinking he was an egomaniac ball player since I didn’t know or give a fuck about the rape charge. Seeing people become as much if not worse moralistic assholes as people they love to criticize for being stupid (i.e. evangelical and other right-wing Christians) really puts the cherry on the sundae of suck.

SonOfSpam

“I hate white women who hate rapists” is a confusing yet undeniably hot taek.

Dunstan

Look, what is being a rapist and a shitty teammate compared to being good at shooting long two’s and being nice to your own daughter? Priorities, people.

SonOfSpam

Some quality Trumpian logic!

blaxabbath

In context, I believe the women to which he is referring are those who hate some rapists and completely look the other way regarding other rapists — especially those who are not black men and/or prominent with their favorite social institutions (namely church, politics, and probably college football).

SonOfSpam

Oh, you mean Republicans. Ok, that makes sense.

Dunstan

Yeah, fair enough. I interpreted the original comment as being a shot at everyone who’s criticizing Saint Kobe. If the point is that some people are hypocrites, yeah, can’t argue with that.

King Hippo

agreed. And it’s weird, I don’t see any outpouring of criticism. It’s 99.99% “kiss his ass like he were a god amongst men” outside of DFO.

Unsurprised

I travel in shitty circles.

Unsurprised

The ones who seem to take special interest and joy in attacking black men especially and other minorities, which often includes a disturbing tendency to belittle, ignore, and attack female minorities while doing digital blackface online – yeah.

Unsurprised

I hate mean people. He was a selfish player? Oh, no. Jordan was also an asshole. So what. It’s this fucking tendency to treat this story like it is the one thing that should define him like it hasn’t been nearly twenty years where things have changed. Because I know some other lawyers here have been involved in the criminal side, I’m just going to say that the worst thing a person did or may have done doesn’t typically define them, specifically not the person they are 16 years later. People can change, and be different, and be more than some fucking item that others use to push an agenda. That’s what makes me a bleeding-heart lefty, that everyone can be saved, everyone has value, and everyone has a presumption of dignity. And while I can be as big a motherfucker as anyone when making jokes, they’re still jokes. Even guys like Jameis are just frames. I don’t give a fuck or think about them off this site, most of the time, and I know I wouldn’t be a dick to him and make crab legs and rape jokes to people around him any more than I would tell Tom Brady to eat shit and die to his face. It’d be funny as shit, but the reality is that I don’t give a fuck about Brady.

My point is that mean people suck, and a lot of this reeks not of people trying to be honest or accurate or anything else; it’s about mean people being assholes because it benefits them materially. Because what the fuck does it really matter or affect anything to treat him like a monster, or Vick, for that matter? Doing so doesn’t make anything better. That’s for goddamn sure.

Unsurprised

No one is going to change a Chris Brown or MAGA or anyone else’s fan’s minds by being a belligerent asshole. It feels good to be right and superior and there is a rush from being violently mean about attacking them, but it doesn’t actually fucking matter. Same with Kobe.

SonOfSpam

And Paul Manafort is still in prison.

Two things are good today.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Freezer vodka shot #1…. IS IN !!!! Let’s do this.
/looks at clock.
Shit. OK, what to do foar two hours? Naked Dance Party?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRZzUh9hcTo

SonOfSpam

Hope yer using quality vodka. Popov or nothing for me.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Tito’s. I’ve got a big assed bottle of Grey Goose, but that shit costs too much to replace.

SonOfSpam

Grey Goose with a big ass is called Grey Goosian.

Wakezilla

The worst thing about my current Injury predicament: In my mind, I had written a pretty good Kobe Bryant Celeb pickakke that never got published. What could have been.

Dunstan

I’m up for Zombie Kobe Bryan Celeb Pickakke. I can’t be the only one.

Could be a whole genre. Zombie Frank Sinatra says “that Patrick Mahomes is one swingin’, ball-slingin’ cat! He’s gonna tear through the San Francisco defense like me tearing through every pussy in Palm Springs! 40-18! That’s not a score prediction, baby, that’s just the age range my lawyer lets me admit to! You should take notes, there, Sanchez!”

Dunstan

Top Three Overdiscussed Celebrity Deaths:
3. Kobe Bryant — ’nuff said.
2. John F. Kennedy, Jr. — basically, a good-looking dude born to a famous family dies a predictable dumb death. Sorry, Boomers, nobody else gives a fuck about “the heir to Camelot” or whatever the fuck you thought this entitled shit was.
1. Princess Diana — a good-looking woman who married into a famous family. I mean, it sucks for her kids and everything, but there were fucking mobs of idiots outside the British embassy holding candlelight vigils. Give me a goddamn break.

SonOfSpam

(“British” good looking maybe)

rockingdog

Found a funny:
*feeding a Fruit Roll-Up into the ticket machine at the arcade*
don’t worry lil buddy, I won’t let you starve

bk109

“What’s an arcade” ?

Unsurprised

A row of small shops people can stroll along in Britain. Kind of like a mall.

Dunstan

In additional breaking news… Kobe Bryant is still dead. Tune in to ESPN for round-the-clock coverage of this developing story.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Dunstan

SOMEONE gets me.

bk109

Wow, the Patriots really assfucked yer psyche? Here’s a thought experiment, instead of dwelling in the past, focus on the present … that is UT’s Pre-Bowl Shittacular!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_mcZVnDBvQ

Senor Weaselo

Well they got the Andy Reid clock management down.

Unsurprised

Remember when they lost to the Dolphins? Here. Let me remind you:

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Dunstan

You’re welcome, America!

Unsurprised

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Game Time Decision

I’ve always loved the fade to black at the end of this gif

WCS

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Gatoraids

Not even Kraft can come back after his beloved Orchids of Asia has been closed.

Game Time Decision

Mrs GTD did not get this memo. When asking about the game she asked which teams were playing and when told she asked which one had Brady. Lol,

LemonJello

Brady Quinn would like to thank her for her concern, but his shift at the Orange Julius doesn’t end until 4pm.

Game Time Decision

I work at Orange Julius?
-Trent Green

litre_cola

Whoa whoa whoa, id Trump still President? I am sure he will fix this issue.

Unsurprised

Even better!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

It’s important to stay hydrated.

bk109

Eh, but is it more important than not denting your hood?

theeWeeBabySeamus

I think he’s denting the trunk at the moment.

bk109

Her trunk will buff right out, it’s the Beemer I’m concerned about! 😀

Senor Weaselo

At least there isn’t a turbo poking out of there, then imagine the damage they could do!

rockingdog

no brady, no problem

Unsurprised

Stalin EVERYONE

LemonJello

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King Hippo

FACKIN’ FACK!! NAWT FAY-uh!!!!

bk109

Only nawt FAY-UH!!! thing here is that the Rev has time to think of a team that’s not even on the field tonight, but doesn’t have the time to CrimeBeat! weekly! THAT IS THE REAL INJUSTICE!