Your “Now Just The Waiting” Wednesday Evening Open Thread

NFL News: the Draft is tomorrow!

It’s pretty slow, as most teams are preparing for the circus & power outages that come with this year’s remote draft.

  • The [Redacteds] are spending their day trying to trade Trent Williams for any form of measurable compensation.
    • They seem to want a high draft pick in 2020 or 2021.
      • Although Mike Brown’s offer of magic beans & three tins of Skyline chili has Dan Snyder’s interest.
  • Percy Harvin has resurfaced & wants to play again.
    • He’s been out of the league for three years, having walked away from the Bills after just two games in 2016.
      • According to ESPN, he underwent hip surgery in August in Gainesville, Florida. Doctors found a blockage he said may have been there since high school.
  • Proving hubris & humility are separate words, Roger Goodell pumped up the positives the NFL Draft will have on society.
    • “People look to us for optimism,” Goodell said. “They look to us for bringing communities together. I think the draft is a great example of that, with restoring hope. It’s hope for our fans. It’s hope for our teams. It’s hope for our players, for these young men who are about to start their careers as prospects and players in the NFL. That’s what this is all about, and I think we need those diversions.

Today is Earth Day,

so in honour of that, today’s good internet dog is Mandy Patinkin’s golden retriever Becky, who interrupted his social media blowing of the shofar to commemorate the date.

Agreed, Becky. But since I’m not Jewish only you can drop the Shanda fur di goyim on the whole exercise. I’ll leave the anti-Semitism to the Trump supporters who chafe at Ivanka’s marriage to Jared.


Tonight’s … entertainment?:

  • Wrasslin’:
    • AEW Dynamite – 8:00PM | TNT / TSN2
    • NXT – 8:00PM | USA
  • Electronic Left Turns:
    • Wednesday Night iRacing – 7:00PM | FS1
      • Coverage of iRacing eSports across multiple disciplines.
  • 2014 NFL Draft – 8:00 PM | ESPN2
    • Round 1 of the 2014 event in New York City.
      • The Blake Bortles / Johnny Fucking Football draft
  • NFL’s Greatest Games – 9:00 PM | FS1
    • From 1999: Denver Broncos vs. Atlanta Falcons in Super Bowl XXXIII in Miami.
      • Against all odds, a Shanahan not losing a Super Bowl.

  • Olympic Classics – 9:00 PM | NBCSN
    • Men’s Basketball: 1992: U.S. vs. Croatia
      • The first U.S. Dream Team vs. Croatia in the men’s basketball gold-medal game in Barcelona.
  • What We Do in the Shadows – 10:00 PM | FX / FX Canada
    • The vampires attend their first human Super Bowl party, while Guillermo’s search for virgins uncovers a deadly threat.
      • Hint – they think it’s a Superb Owl party.
      • It’s perfect [DFO] programming!

Use tonight to concoct your wildest draft scenario fuckups. For example, Pete Carroll is going to be bored pretty quickly, so he’ll ask John Schneider for a CD.

Which he probably forgot in the car.

Schneider will mishear Carroll, and somehow the Seahawks will have traded up to draft CeeDee Lamb out of Oklahoma.

I grant that was a reach, but we can remember Jimmy Haslam’s decision to draft JFF. So get at it, Commentists.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
Subscribe
Notify of
141 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

That’s damn good. I like it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Brick Meathook

They met at the 1964 New York Worlds Fair.

Where is your Messiah now????

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OOOK Court allows it!

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Slave to 100……

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

I am also intrigued by this, “slave to 100 jungle brides“ offer. I will wire you any amount of money.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I think it’s been said before, but bears repeating. Trump is shallow and just fucking stupid; McConnell is flat out straight up Satanic fucking evil.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

And their supporters.

comment image

Brick Meathook

It’s a good gig.

Col. Duke LaCross

Credulous Dollar. CREDULOUS DOLLAR!

Brick Meathook

I thought it was “Creflo A. Dollar.” Is that his son?

Senor Weaselo

Apparently he changed his name earlier this month or something.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Appropriate typo. Brick is correct:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Creflo_Dollar

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

If god will save them, why waste the money? Pretty logical if that’s the true belief.
And if you die, you’re actually being rewarded with eternal bliss. You’ve been chosen.
In the right frame of mind all they’ve done is assist the true believers.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

McConnell has some secrets.

comment image

BC Dick

I’d pay a dollar for that

BrettFavresColonoscopy

It’s beer o clock

Viva La Tabula Raza

Are you in Singapore or Mumbai or something?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Not sure, ask me again after another 8.2% beer

Brick Meathook

Hey BFC! It’s whiskey o’clock! And I work remotely on Montreal time from here in Los Angeles, so I just show up on Zoom at 6:00 AM and send a few emails and then go back to sleep until a sensible hour like 10:00 AM Pacific.

BFC is the first DFOer I ever met in real life, back when that was a thing. We met at The Harbor Room in Playa del Rey. tWBS was there later.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m trying to make room in the fridge for our next pork order.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m bacon you up on this.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

Just what the world needs. Another chick with a home jewelry business.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Time to go get crunk and watch….whatever, and try to sleep.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-xTttimcNk

Viva La Tabula Raza

After loving the shit out of Animals, and having seen the Floyd tour on that album in the rain while having eaten too many mushrooms at Jeppesen Stadium (home of the UH Cougars) back in April 77 and loved the hell out of it, I was rather disappointed in The Wall. Especially since at the time of the album release they only played live shows for that album in (I think) NY and LA. So, fuck us all in Flyover country.

yeah right

I went to one of the LA shows at the Sports Arena. There may have been acid involved.

Senor Weaselo

I just saw the Madden news, BTW. I’m sorry for LAMAR! inevitably breaking this year.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s what he gets for Truzz Trump

WCS

Is the poker game available on a mobile, or CPU only?

Mr. Ayo

CPU only

WCS

Keeps redirecting me to pokerstarsmtairy dot com.

theeWeeBabySeamus

pokerstars dot net

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

Let’s be honest. The mask is a stand-in for duct tape.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That’s another fetish for Hippo to judge. I personally like the ball gag that they can breath through…. because of that “one” time.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That one time I read about…. of course.

Horatio Cornblower

Poker table is open. tWbs and I just throwing chips at each other.

BC Dick

I have the app. I am unclear what happens next

theeWeeBabySeamus

Club 3210828

theeWeeBabySeamus

Then click on home games.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

BC Dick

Straight from my smart tv camera earlier.

BC Dick

But where? It’s not coming up. Goddamn it.

theeWeeBabySeamus

if you click on the club it should bring up another window and show you the table. Click on that.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Oh shit, there’s a password. I forgot about that.

BC Dick

It’s PokerStars right? I don’t see any clubs

Horatio Cornblower

Password in ‘National Disgrace’

BC Dick

I still can’t find the bleeding club to get it started. First the mail now this. The world just wants to piss in my froot loops

theeWeeBabySeamus

As per Sharkbait….

The invitation code?
Club ID number: 2103481
Invitation Code: National Disgrace

Sadly, everyone’s gone to bed for the night tonight. But I do hope you’ll join us next time. Which I hope will be soon.

BC Dick

Ok. Just figured out it’s not available on mobile. That was my issue

Col. Duke LaCross

My application to the club requires approval.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yep…gimme a sec to find Sharkbait if possible. I can’t remember the password and it won’t show it.

Mr. Ayo

It’s only available on the desktop version.

BC Dick

Indeed, thanks. I should have searched on the internet first instead of boiling with fury but what can ya do.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Boooooooooooo

Brick Meathook

comment image

Redshirt

Reports are that the Bengals have told Joe Burrow that they’re picking him. So unless Miami pulls a Ditka or Mike Brown frees himself from the duct tape and gets out of the locked closet that Coach Taylor and Brown’s kids put him in, Burrow’s gonna be a Bengal.

May BLEERGH have mercy on his soul.

herodotus450

I look forward to his resurgence 10 years from now when he signs with the Saints.

Redshirt

The Bengals lease with the county is due in 2026. I’m predicting he goes 6-10 to 8-8 for six years, the county tells the team to GTFO, and Burrow leads the San Diego Bengals to Super Bowl LXI while shattering several offensive and passing records.

BC Dick

I thought some rich tech guy would buy the chargers and move them back. I think the Rams have to pay the chargers if they move back whereas now the chargers pay the Rams for being in their territory.

herodotus450

Only way a Brown-led franchise is gonna win the super bowl is if all the other teams go off and start a new league and leave him behind.

Redshirt

In this scenario, Mike Brown dies two days after he moves the team and his daughter takes over. She’s actually smart and listens to people who know what they’re talking about.

BC Dick

Well thought out. Like a fantasy with a hot coworker, you need a back story.

BC Dick

I think Burrow will be good. Didn’t he set a record for completion percentage? That kind of thing transfers.
I remember seeing a throw by Bryce Petty in his last college game where he missed a wide open guy in the back of the end zone by 10 feet from the 5 yard line or something. Any scout with a brain should just write him off right there.
Granted, Petty was a 4th round pick. By the jets again. I swear I’m not a jets fan but that throw stuck in my head.

BC Dick

That Ditka draft was great. What a pair of stones on that guy. Ricky Williams is a hell of an athlete and seems like a pretty good dude, too. One of those rare guys who’s such a good athlete he can play pro football even though he doesn’t really care about it. Like Curtis Martin. I think. Or a different Jets tailback.

Unsurprised

Nothing is as fun as it is with an audience.
comment image

BC Dick

I agree. That’s why I masturbate in the sauna at the Y.

Unsurprised

comment image

ballsofsteelandfury

Lucky dog

Redshirt

(watches a classic game)
“This is actually kind of cool.”

(watches a classic NFL Draft and sees a good player get drafted to a team that you now know ends up ruining their career)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXb0zcEM-rI

theeWeeBabySeamus

I was told there would be poker.

The Maestro

The table beckons, friend.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hmmmm….didn’t show before. Maybe I need a reboot.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Love how Trump threw his bus into reverse and backed right over the ass-kissing Georgia governor.

WCS

These cheesedick politicians still can’t/won’t realize Herr Orange does not give one shit about anyone – ANYONE – but himself and that’s he’s clearly senile.

BC Dick

Isn’t that true of all politicians? Other than the senility. Which I don’t think he is. Just a prick.
I’m hoping Canada’s tube top votes in Biden this fall, though. He’ll be fun, too, but I’m ready for an SNL without 42 minutes of jokes about congressional hearings or whatever the hell they keep prattling on about.

Redshirt

Georgia died already? That was quick.

Spur

Originally i was going to be off this Thursday and Friday for the NFL Draft. We were going to get passes to watch from the stands at the Bellagio.

Well, am still taking those days off. One co-manager tried to guilt me. Fuck him! It’s my time off.

I cant wait to see 60 yr old GMs try to use Teams for the 1st time ever. I have money some GM is going to pick a player already taken this year.

Unsurprised

Maybe the mayor of Las Vegas will comp you tickets to the Freemont Experience or whatever it’s called since she’s so eager to to reopen the city.

Spur

I love how she was called out that the Vegas Strip everyone thinks off isn’t in LV city limits. She speaks for no one.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Really. I’m 60 and can’t even figure out how to have a three-way (snicker) call on a smartphone.

Unsurprised

This still cracks me up. Sound on.

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/BadActualBoubou-mobile.mp4

The Maestro

Evening, folks. Hope you’re well. It’s Blues Brothers night tonight. Lady Maestro’s never watched it before with me. Said the last time she tried was 10 years ago with her family and she fell asleep half an hour in. Tonight, we right this wrong.

Additionally, poker is happening tonight, if’n y’all are interested.

ballsofsteelandfury

I place the over under on her falling asleep at 40 minutes. And that’s only because Maestro will be there to poke her to stay awake.

scotchnaut

“I hate Canadian Nazis.”

-What you will say to her (under your breath) after she falls asleep a second time.

BC Dick

Better be the full version and not some neutered nanny state abomination.

Dunstan

I might be up for some poker

Col. Duke LaCross

I’ve applied, need approval on poker sir.

Unsurprised

Balls’s tiktok video from the prior post comments
comment image

ballsofsteelandfury

God Bless You, young man!

scotchnaut

I was told that cocaine was not a sponsor of this site. Clarification, please?

ballsofsteelandfury

You’ve clearly been listening to the wrong DFOers…

Don T

To clarify:
comment image

LemonJello

comment image

Unsurprised

That I have not been tested yet given my job is fucking mind-blowing.

Dunstan

In the greatest testing country in the world? That’s inconceivable!

WCS

So you work for the Texas governor?

Unsurprised

I’m the guy who keeps people from pushing his chair into traffic

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ll give you a hundred bucks and a bottle of Everclear to look the other way just once. Soon, please.

scotchnaut

“You’re doing a helluva job, Unsurprisedy!”

WCS

BORT is about to be drafted.

Unsurprised

comment image

litre_cola

So I am moving to Pitcairn Island. No Rona there, maybe a little bit of ‘cest but thats a family problem.

BC Dick

It’s not quite the same but if you’re looking for inlawcest I can make that happen.

BC Dick

Apparently my original inlawcest offer was moderated into oblivion.
Still stands.

ballsofsteelandfury

Saw this on YouTube. I like the guy’s London tour videos and this one is great.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gr7MWxADnko&feature=youtu.be

scotchnaut

Fyi, I’m doing the Thursday NFL Draft intro tomorrow. Let’s do a contest! Pick a team and a player you think will end up together. You have 10 picks but they must be ooutside the top five. I’ll be doing the same. Submit your choices in tomorrow’s thread.

/the winner gets a bunch of things in a cardboard box!
//seriously, I’m going to put a bunch of things in a cardboard box and ship it to you

WCS

Used condoms and syringes are things!

scotchnaut

“We are things also!”

-Ketchup Chips, Maple Syrup and A Stupid Camo Ballcap*

*these some are things that will be shipped to the winner

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

49??

comment image

LemonJello

Budget cuts.

scotchnaut

The word “True” slants right. I’m going to have rethink everything.

BC Dick

I’ll do a lot of things for ketchup chips. Who’s coming in second?

ballsofsteelandfury

Fuck! Now you’re going to force me to care about the draft!

BC Dick

Could you maybe throw in some stamps, too?

Col. Duke LaCross

Do the Bears even have a pick before Saturday?

scotchnaut

“They’ve got several according to our data.”

-Nostril Weekly

litre_cola

Fuck now I have to do research. I enjoy a good bag of ketchup chips. Will they be Old Dutch?

BC Dick

Gotta get the old Dutch rink chips.

WCS

Riverboat Ron will be using his wife and kids to help him in the draft instead of assistant coaches and support staff. This isn’t because of corona; it’s just Dan Snyder’s typical draft day procedure.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

WCS

How Roger Goodell perceives himself versus reality:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Prz7que9MT4

BrettFavresColonoscopy

How’s it going, pickle fuckers?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Fine dill.

comment image

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

comment image

LemonJello

This new Planet of the Apes series takes a unique spin on things.

Also, OOK.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I thought it might be a modern take/homage to the first scene in 2001: A Space Odyssey.