This magnificent piece of brilliance:

Thanks to Senor Weaselo’s posts, I am ALL IN on Marble Racing. My chosen team, Balls of Chaos, seem to be the St. Kilda Saints of the marble world. Those of you familiar with the AFL know exactly what I’m talking about.

Let me first introduce to you the entire team:

Anarchy (Team Captain)

Tumult

Clutter

Snarl

Disarray (Reserve)

And now, let me show you the team record:

As always, I have some questions.

1. Do you think that Disarray’s nickname is “General”
2. Would he only let his friends call him that?
3. Why am I assuming Disarray is a male marble?
4. With a name like Disarray doesn’t that scream woman?
5. For that matter, couldn’t the entire team be female?
6. Before you think that’s sexist, have you met any of my exes?
7. Doesn’t Snarl remind you of Winkles?
8. Do you miss Winkles too?
9. Do you think there will be a NFL season this fall?
10. What are the odds on Tom Brady getting the COVID?
11. How much money would Hippo put on that not happening JUST TO MAKE IT HAPPEN?
12. That’s good reverse jinxing, isn’t it?
13. Wasn’t Jinx the absolute worst name for a James Bond Girl?
14. Do you think I’m ever going to finish that series?
15. Will the Bond movies of the 80s ever be shown again on streaming channels?
16. Am I the only one that appreciates the genius of Never Say Never Again and calls it the Slutty Thunderball?
17. Speaking of slutty, that Snarl seems like she’s a goer, doesn’t she?
18. Is that why she has no individual podiums in her marbling career?
19. Do you think she has marble sex before or after events?
20. Probably both, amirite?
21. Do they hand out marble condoms at the Marblelympics like in the real Olympics?
22. Did you know that they had to change the name of the Marblelympics to the Marble League because the motherfucking IOC actually complained about it and threatened to sue?
23. Isn’t that some fucked up shit?
24. Since we’re good in the sand and in the snow, doesn’t that mean that Balls of Chaos are really from Los Angeles instead of the Chinese city that the Marble Wiki page says they’re from?
25. If so, how long until Leonardo DiCaprio lures one of the Balls of Chaos marblegals to his mansion and takes compromising pictures?