Let’s Do Some More! Your Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

Tilts? Matches? Confrontations? Matchups? Oh yeah, we got more coming your way. TO THE GAMES!

Chargers/Bengalis:

Cincinnati is yours for the taking young Burrow. That is, if you play up to expectations. And if you manage to succeed, could you do something about the lighting and decor? Thanks. Austin Ekeler is listed as the starter but he’s a mere 200 pounds, not nearly big enough to handle the rock the way a traditional RB1 does. Look for (reviews depth chart, sees that Jackson is 200 and Kelley is only 212) umm, someone to hit the weight room hard, I guess?

Cards/Niners:

The breakout seasons for Murray and Drake may have to be delayed for a week or so if San Franny’s D does their thing. Even Hopkins might be hemmed in because he’ll be tailed by the underrated but very effective Emmanuel Moseley.

Bucs/Saints:

This is the only team that Brees can play against whereby he be the younger qb. I thought for sure that the Jags would run Fournette into the ground and then kick him to the curb at the end of the year because I guess I’m just that cynical. But no, they did not because I guess being a cancer in the locker room can cause a change of plans. I read somewhere that rb’s that run for over 900 yards and score 5 td’s or less almost always bounce back into the double digits the following year which makes a great deal of sense to me.

Do your stretches, grab your snacks, pour your beverages, break some wind-do whatever you need to and get ready for round 2. GO!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

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Dunstan

THIS U.S. OPEN FINAL, I CALL IT A BROWNS-BENGALS GAME BECAUSE NEITHER SIDE SEEMS CAPABLE OF WINNING

Redshirt

Most Glorious Tie?

Dunstan

Tennis, like Donovan McNabb, does not believe in ties.

Unsurprised

Oh, fuck me

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
Doktor Zymm

Wait…did they just play fake boos??

Doktor Zymm

I’m loving the sparkly cleats though

Petronel

The QB force field may still be up in Foxboro, but looks like the bailout calls may have followed our boy down south…

Petronel

Not that it actually made any difference, of course

Doktor Zymm

Going to the end Bucc/Saints game it appears to be one giant Brady apologist-fest. Has the whole game been like this? Puke.

Unsurprised

^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Gatoraids

Vegas goes wild

Petronel

That should do it

BrettFavresColonoscopy

It’s official, Tom Brady sucks

Viva La Tabula Raza

Aikman is still schlobbing his knob, though.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, yes, he’s a good QB, but he really sucks as a person.

Unsurprised

Qards are the only ones in Arizona practicing social distancing.

https://twitter.com/49ers/status/1305245769667022848

Gatoraids

Gronk didn’t score Valtex stock going down

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ll have wait till tomorrow for KHip to tell me what I should think about this afternoon’s matchups, but right now my favorite bit is all the announcers having to say “Washington Football Team.”

Unsurprised

<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>Tom Brady is the first QB to have 3 straight games with a pick six since Matt Schaub and Blaine Gabbert, who both did it in 2013 <a href=”https://t.co/dDz86qgTt7″>pic.twitter.com/dDz86qgTt7</a></p>&mdash; ProFootballReference (@pfref) <a href=”https://twitter.com/pfref/status/1305283748062269440?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw”>September 13, 2020</a></blockquote> https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

Like being tossed a cold Natty Bo. Or whatever. This is cool.

https://twitter.com/MySportsUpdate/status/1305193447721181184

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
Doktor Zymm

No love for the gold diggers today!

Unsurprised

The Browns blown fake punt got me yelling the same thing Cameron Diaz yells at LL Cool J when he fumbles in Any Given Sunday: “TWO HANDS, YOU MORON!”

https://streamable.com/gnbq9e

Unsurprised

So I thought I read that now that Cam is a P*t, he’s not allowed to be freely beaten up anymore? Shit. That makes me sad because I hate everything about the P*ts but I like Cam.

Unsurprised

Holy shit. The P*ts QB force field even works for Cam Newton.

https://www.clippituser.tv/c/dyqygk

King Hippo

Speaking of “last shreds of sanity” – I did finally learn what assdick Bayliss said about DAK! earlier in the week. I hope he gets the most painful cancer possible.

Unsurprised

Everyone who pays him for this trolling shit deserves AIDS cancer for letting his bullshit get to this point and also for continuing to pay him for this.

Doktor Zymm

Wow, just looked at that…Bayliss giving a textbook demonstration of toxic masculinity

herodotus450

Not quite Martin Grammattica level, but close, close.

ballsofsteelandfury

Someone please check on Redshirt!

Last edited 3 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
King Hippo

guys, we best ALL give him an alibi for his murder spree

Unsurprised

He’s in southern Ohio. No one would notice, and if they do, we just say someone’s wild animals got loose.

Redshirt

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Redshirt

SHANKLOR taketh away

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

That Lions dropped pass is heartbreaking. Let’s watch it again!

Spoiler
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/The Price Is Right “loser” horn theme plays

LemonJello

That’s a Quoteables winner right there!

Gatoraids

Welcome to the Bengals burrows

Last edited 3 years ago by Gatoraids
King Hippo

PEAK BUNGLES

hippofant

Hey Chargers, Burrow’s thrown every pass on this drive to the same spot. You may want to cover over there.

Petronel

Watching Tawwwwwmy’s new boys shit the bed while listening to a good game I’d really rather be watching (NYNERZ).
Random observation: Plague hasn’t left Sean Payton’s face any less punchable.

Petronel

Second observation: funny how Cards radio has Biden ads every thirty seconds

King Hippo

they want AZ, NC, or TX badly

Viva La Tabula Raza

Me too.

King Hippo

oh well, all on Fat Kicker for OT

Gatoraids

Bulllshittt

King Hippo

Somebody having a pony-gasm right now

Doktor Zymm

Watching Garoppolo run will never not be awkward

King Hippo

The ref better be adding to stoppage time due to these Clippers du Merde shenanigans

King Hippo

Replay official has Drake in fantasy obvs

Gatoraids

Replay official a young millennial can’t get enough of Drake

King Hippo

and/or a stripper

Doktor Zymm

Hey, this was boring for a while, but now a pair of TDs, second being Hopkins doing a thing !

Gatoraids

Haven’t seen a Hopkins devour a team like that since Silence of the Lambs

Doktor Zymm

And without the benefit of a nice Chianti! (Gatorade just isn’t the same)

King Hippo

/slurping sounds

Doktor Zymm

This is what I imagine it’s like to be a Bengals fan, just shitting into the void

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King Hippo

ok, Qardinals/Tomsulas is pretty good

Gatoraids

Please saints score to set me up for max Godwin garbage time

King Hippo

They need to keep passing so Beatie Mixon preserves his NOICE!!!! rushing day.

King Hippo

I’m not gonna learn what this “gender reveal” bruhaha is all about. Sounds like sommet too stupid to process through my addled brain.

I mean, my opinion of Murrika is low enough as is.

Doktor Zymm

I see it as a way to identify people I would never want to be friends with

yeah right

Save what remains of your sanity and NOT investigate further.

Doktor Zymm

Hey, Smokey just made a scorepoint!