Less than Elite and Wednesday Night Open Thread

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Latest posts by Joliet Jake Delhomme (see all)

Weird Wrestling Shit:

Okay, last week saw the strangest, funniest and most internet-divisive segment in the history of televised wrestling. For those of you that didn’t see it, lets setup the backstory.

Chris Jericho and MJF have been having some of the most entertaining interactions over the past few weeks. MJF wants to join the Inner Circle and Chris is wary of letting him in. They have had some really fun passive-aggressive complement wars. Like the girl who says “Normally I don’t think much of short guys, but you make it work”. Plus they were always trying to one-up each other. Imagine the old Monty Python sketch: “We lived in a cardboard box in the middle of the road.” “You had a box? Lucky bastard!” Now we are ready for:

LE DINNER DEBONAIR…

Fun fact. Yes, Chris and MJF are doing their own singing. As some of you already know, Chris Jericho is the lead singer of the band Fozzy, so not unexpected. What has been unearthed this week is that MJF was a member of his high school acapella group, the Acafellas.

I think he is the first singer in the video. Here is what I admire about how AEW does its booking. I am virtually certain Chris and MJF cooked this up all on their own and presented it to Tony as we saw it. Tony says “Well, that’s kind of weird, but if you guys want to do it. Lets go.” Re: the stripper jokes from last week. I assume any moderately skilled female dancer in Jacksonville called off from her shift at Flash Dancers to make the show.

I thought this skit was a blast. Some on the interwebs thought it pulled them out the wrestling show and made them think they were watching SNL. Those people are wrong and crabby and I don’t want to be their friend.

AEW Dynamite Preview:

Cody vs. Orange Cassidy in a lumberjack match for the TNT Championship.

Wrestling Glossary: Lumberjack Match – When one of the wrestlers involved in a feud has a habit of running out of the ring during a match, eventually they will have a “Lumberjack Match”. This means that the ring is surrounded by other wrestlers. Their only job is to throw any wrestler that comes to the outside back into the ring. This is an odd stipulation for this match, since neither of these wrestlers are known to leave the ring out of cowardice. I assume the Dark Order (beating on Cody) and Team Taz (beating on Orange) will be part of the lumberjacks and shenanigans will ensue.

Hangman Page vs. Wardlow in an AEW Title Eliminator Tournament semifinal match.

Kenny Omega vs. Penta El 0M in an AEW Title Eliminator Tournament semifinal match.

Rey Fenix was injured in his match last week, so Penta moves up to the semifinal.

Eddie Kingston vs. Matt Sydal.

Match added due to injury. See below.

The Inner Circle holds a town hall meeting to determine whether MJF can join the faction.

One match was pulled (Tay Conti vs Abadon) due to a serious injury to Abadon. She took an elbow directly to the throat and was unable to breathe. She was sent to the hospital and is expected to make a full recovery. Remember, wrestling is scripted, not fake.

Wishing you a speedy recovery

Best Comedy Movie Results:

I told you there was no way I could keep myself from opening an Excel spreadsheet and counting up the votes. Hello, OCD, my old friend!

Movie Votes
Blazing Saddles 9
Airplane! 7
Caddyshack 6
Animal House 4
Monty Python and the Holy Grail 4

This out of a total of 36 movie submissions and 14 voters. Mel, please accept this gently-used fleshlight as a token of our appreciation. I also think it is the only movie on the list that could not be made today. The language alone would make it unfilmable.

Tonight’s Sprots

Brain Damage Sports

  • AEW Dynamite: 7:00pm, TNT
  • WWE NXT: 7:00pm, USA (just to be fair)

Futbol

  • MLS Soccer: Orlando City SC vs. Atlanta United: 6:30pm, FS1
  • MLS Soccer: Portland Timbers vs. Los Angeles Galaxy: 9:00pm, ESPN
  • MLS Soccer: All MLS games are available on ESPN+ if you are so inclined.

Other!

  • Drone Racing League: 6:00pm, NBCSN
  • Women’s College Volleyball: Georgia at Tennessee (Can you guess the NCAA exception?): 6:00pm, ESPNU

  • Women’s College Volleyball: Kentucky at Missouri: 8:00pm, ESPNU

Let the beatings commence!

 

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Joliet Jake Delhomme
My wife has been told to bring my ashes to the bleachers of Wrigley Field and pour me into the ivy. Cubs, Bears, LA Kings, Arsenal and GWS Giants fan. Active boycotter of all college sports, having sat in a classroom with a "Student-Athlete". I also watch NASCAR and golf on the weekends, because I like naps.
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Petronel

Two Titmice Vodka for breast cancer awareness. Of course.

WCS

What’s up, Tina guys and girls?

Lil’er WCS decided my laptop needed a drink last night, and poured a cup of water on it. Four full months of work, and now it’s shot.

The point is, my participation may be limited for the foreseeable future, since now I have to do literally everything on my phone.

How are you?

Gratliff

The data is most likely perfectly fine. Wait for it to dry out and hook it up to a different computer with one of these and use it like a flash drive.
https://www.amazon.com/StarTech-com-SATA-USB-Cable-USB3S2SAT3CB/dp/B00HJZJI84

Petronel

Yep. When I worked the help desk, we had a few laptops come in with water/coffee/soda spills. Drying them out thoroughly before turning them on did the trick.

Last edited 1 month ago by Petronel
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m pretty good!

Petronel

Loving Penelope in the Orange Cassidy outfit.

Unsurprised

Who was the QB that used to be referred to as The Flow? I want to say some southeast team’s QB, but I’m drawing a blank.

Mr. Ayo

Holy shit, Upro** has really scrubbed everything KSK from the internet. Morons.

Unsurprised

Yeah. It fucking sucks. Anyway, I found it. RobotsFightingDinosaurs wrote The Continuing Adventures Of The Flow about Blaine Gabbert, which I who I thought but then I remembered he was already Yo Gabbert Gabbert and thought he couldn’t have two funny nicknames.

But I guess you can draw blood from a poorly-thrown stone.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That guy from Jacksonville. Um…then he made it the Colts…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That guy from Jacksonville. Um…then he made it the Colts…oh wait, no he didn’t. It was Blaine Gabbert, wasn’t it?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yes it was Gabbert

Last edited 1 month ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Gratliff

The most unnecessary Fame-asser (all of them) to end it

Gratliff

lol Billy Gunn getting the fuck out of the dodge before the catch

Gratliff

Fucked it up. Keeping it.
comment image

Gratliff

It’s Kane!

Petronel

Teasing many things in that segment, not least the potential for serious disagreement between Santana and Ortiz. This could get quite interesting.

Gratliff

Great moments in surreal promo history
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bi16Xiwt7sQ

Gratliff

Chris Jericho is at least tangentially related to so many of these. This one was a precursor to the first championship unification.
comment image

Gratliff

Or was it shortly after? I dunno. 2001 was a weird year.

Petronel

Holy shit, they dragged out old man Bischoff again

ballsofsteelandfury

Did it start early today or something?

Petronel

The master’s in medieval history is legit. He’s particularly good here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBZeCaktqU&feature=emb_logo

Gratliff

It also keeps Fozzy from touring, so it counts as a public service

Petronel

Oh Lawd here we go

Gratliff

Time for 6-man tag belts

Beerguyrob

Freebird rules!

Petronel

Eddie Kingston is such a great character that his wrestling is almost peripheral.

Unsurprised

What the fuck is going on boys?

scotchnaut

“Cum. Lots of it, tbh.”

-The Catholic Church

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“OH NO NOT ZETA HOUSE!” – Matt Leinart

Petronel

If Sydal falls off the ropes again, everybody DRINK

Petronel

And now…well, you know

Gratliff

The most obvious finals remains undeterred

Petronel

AEW has been starting red-hot each week for a while. Terrific match.

Gratliff

It’s really easy to forget how good Page is at flippy shit

Gratliff

Jesus, he does a gorgeous Swanton Bomb

Petronel

Love a big guy who can fly like that.

Petronel

“Emotionally unavailable”. Sometimes it is the little things.

Last edited 1 month ago by Petronel
Gratliff

An important thing if you’re looking to enjoy modern Chris Jericho is ignoring pretty much everything he does outside of wrestling. For my money, he’s the best pro wrestler of all time. He’s also a big dumb problematic motherfucker outside of it, though. Joe Rogan without the DMT basically.

scotchnaut

My youtube suggest thingy is absolutely relentless regarding David Bowie talking about Lou Reed to the point where I’m not sure I want to hear colored girls sing.

scotchnaut

20 yr. Old Me: “So, strange coincidence, in high school every girl I dated was either on the volleyball or basketball team. Weird!”

35 yr. Old Me: “You’re such a dumb dipshit. You just liked tight butts.”

Mid-50’s Me: “I’m so very glad there wasn’t a social media thingy back in the day that could come back and haunt me today about how much I like the tight butts. [wipes sweaty brow]

Last edited 1 month ago by scotchnaut
litre_cola

I dated them too cuz I have always liked tall women!

herodotus450

Glad to see so many people made it over to our companion site, Portal Slowly Unlatches, last night.

scotchnaut

“I find your lack of a deep dive into the Detroit Red Wings ownership disturbing.”

-Greg Louganis