Your “Welcome To Texas!” Saturday Evening Open Thread

Beerguyrob

Fifty-seven years ago today, John F. Kennedy visited San Antonio & Houston. He gave some speeches & was reported to have had a generally wonderful time. He retired for the evening in Fort Worth, Texas, and expected to give some more speeches after a comfortable ride in an open-air car with John Connolly & their respective wives. I believe Jackie intended to wear a pink suit.

Forty-five years ago today, Queen released “A Night At The Opera”.

Of course, we all know about “Bohemian Rhapsody”, but what most folks forget is that this album also has “You’re My Best Friend” and Brian May’s instrumental version of “God Save The Queen”. Plus, the album title was inspired by the Marx Brothers movie; it turns out Groucho was a fan, and he invited them to his house, where they performed songs from the album for him.

And fifty years ago this coming Friday, The Kinks released “Lola Versus The Powerman and the Moneygoround”.

Obviously famous for “Lola”, this album also has the underappreciated “Got To Be Free”, “Get Back In Line”, and “Apeman”. It did well enough that they were able to renegotiate their contract, getting funding to build their own studio – Konk – and the first album to come from that was “Muswell Hillbillies”. Plus, their unofficial four-year ban from touring the States had ended, so they were able to tour in support of the album, and spent part of the time with some kid from London that knew how to play the piano.

Music history is real history.


Sunday Broadcast Maps: (courtesy 506sports.com)

CBS SINGLE

 Anchorage
 Fairbanks
 Honolulu

Tennessee @ Baltimore – Jim Nantz, Tony Romo

Pittsburgh @ Jacksonville – Ian Eagle, Charles Davis

New England @ Houston – Andrew Catalon, James Lofton

Cincinnati @ Washington – Spero Dedes, Adam Archuleta

Miami @ Denver (LATE) – Kevin Harlan, Trent Green

NY Jets @ LA Chargers (LATE) – Greg Gumbel, Rich Gannon

——————————————————-

FOX EARLY

 Anchorage
 Fairbanks
 Honolulu
Atlanta @ New Orleans – Kevin Burkhardt, Daryl Johnston
Philadelphia @ Cleveland – Adam Amin, Mark Schlereth
Detroit @ Carolina – Kevin Kugler, Chris Spielman
——————————————————-

FOX LATE

 Anchorage
 Fairbanks
 Honolulu
Green Bay @ Indianapolis – Joe Buck, Troy Aikman
Dallas @ Minnesota – Kenny Albert, Jonathan Vilma
How shitty are the Cowboys that FOX won’t even send Troy to cover them? Shitty enough that I’m starting Minnesota’s defence in fantasy.

Tonight’s sports:

  • NCAA:
    • Tennessee at Auburn – 7:00PM | ESPN / TSN2
    • Oklahoma State at Oklahoma – 7:30PM | ABC
    • Arizona at Washington – 8:00PM | FOX
    • Southern California at Utah – 10:30PM | ESPN / TSN2
    • Washington State at Stanford – 10:30PM | FS1
  • Fisticuffs:
    • UFC 255 – Figueiredo vs. Perez: From Las Vegas
      • Prelims – 6:30PM | ESPN2 / TSN5
    • PBC Fight Night:
      • Javier Fortuna vs. Antonio Lozada – 7:00PM | FS1

Have yourselves a luverly evening. Maybe listen to a whole album instead of just the singles. You’ll be pleasantly rewarded.

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Beerguyrob
Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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litre_cola

Looks around for the morning post. Guess I will just text Hippo my obscenities.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So you’re saying he would

/puts on Blair Walsh sunglasses

Nail it?

YEEEEEAAAAAHHH

rockingdog

last funny:

I tweet “more like Vladimir poopin” and turn up poisoned in London a week later

rockingdog

SC is rockin to a W
home games the rest of the way….

Brick Meathook

I think John F Kennedy was a pretty good President.

It’s shame that Johnson had him killed, but I guess he really had no choice. Would we have ever won the Vietnam War under JFK? No, we needed LBJ (and Nixon) for that. That’s what makes America great.

Viva La Tabula Raza

LBJ was a complete dick, but he got some shit done. Civil Rights, Voting Rights, Medicare, etc. Shot himself in the nuts over Viet Nam. Robert Caro’s biography shows both the hateful and useful sides of his personality. Also a brilliant history of the 20th century. My electric company (Pedernales Co-Op) is the first one he got going here in the TX Hill Country under FDR’s Rural Electrification Project when he was elected to Congress.

Brick Meathook

You meant “he had a huge dick.”

Horatio Cornblower

Beaver all over the Golden Bears tonight, which is something I would say after mistakenly wandering into a Key West bar focusing on senior gay men.

Viva La Tabula Raza

“mistakenly.”

Horatio Cornblower

We honeymooned there 20+ years ago and literally joined a gay club so we didn’t have to pay the cover charge. Couldn’t have been nicer people.

Went back about 5 years ago and was sad to see the place had been replaced by another bar.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Me and my GF at the time went and visited my folks when they lived in the Keys 25 years ago. When we hung out in Key West we played a variation on the SNL skit “Jew/Not a Jew?”, but our version was “Homosexual/Not a Homosexual?” about the staff personnel at the various retail establishments we visited.

Unsurprised

Golden Bears is other name for Lemon Party

Last edited 11 days ago by Unsurprised
Horatio Cornblower

USC has done a lot of good things, but none better than kicking Lori Loughlin’s horrible children the fuck out of school.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, per BGR, new experiment–rye, punt e mes, creme de violette, splash of absinthe.

Pretty good.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Guess it needs a name. Purple fairy?

Horatio Cornblower

comment image

Sure, make me one while you’re at it.

herodotus450

Is this the way Rutgers ends? Not with a bang but with a whimper

Viva La Tabula Raza

And getting drafted by Belichick.

Don T

“Lola” is a perfect song and a genius piece of art. I will pound the table* for that always.

* tap keypad

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Pounding the table sounds like a euphemism for something described in that song.

Viva La Tabula Raza

After 50 years, I still can’t figure out what a “dark brown voice” sounds like.

Horatio Cornblower

I believe Mick Jagger nailed that in the song ‘Brown Sugar’, which is not at all problematic and would certainly be release to great acclaim in today’s world.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I really look forward to reading the reviews over on The Root.

Gumbygirl

I thought it was background voice, which doesn’t make any sense either!

Viva La Tabula Raza

There’s a lot of Kinks songs that qualify. For starters:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_MqfF0WBsU
Sunny Afternoon
I Go to Sleep
Celluloid Heroes

The list goes on and on
Ray Davies is a fucking genius. He singlehandedly out-wrote both of the songwriting duos of Lennon-McCartney and Jagger-Richards. That’s my opinion, at least.

Last edited 11 days ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
BrettFavresColonoscopy

It has come to my attention that this was a hit in 2010. I’d never heard it before tonight. Am I alone in that?

https://youtu.be/wWhtcU4-xAM

Unsurprised

It’s in a lot of DJ mixes, so I have. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Unsurprised

Also, this is the song that track sampled … heavily.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxggltjIVFI

herodotus450

Ambrosioni wide left, Rugters hasn’t won (or lost) yet.

Horatio Cornblower

OK, Arizona grabs 17 points in the next 33 seconds and they’re right back in this thing.

yeah right

I just realized that all of us are part of The Singularity. By us just BSing here tonight we’re all going to achieve immortality.
Each iteration of our interactions ensures that we live forever!

Hand me that joint and I’ll explain.

Sharkbait

Go on…

Horatio Cornblower

You’re sure Seamus only sent you peppers from his garden, right?

King Hippo

This week! On Peppers Or Poppers?

Viva La Tabula Raza

I don’t know about your conclusion.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gyF_5GBMj0

herodotus450

Rutgors needs a FG in overtime to win

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just made an aviation but swapped out the gin for rye. Still good.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That’s a good point.

/busts out the absinthe

Horatio Cornblower

A friend of mine insisted we try absinthe once, and he did the whole ritual set up and when I finally got to drink it I found it tasted like shit and I wasn’t even remotely inclined to make out with my insanely hot twin sist…and I may be mixing this up with ‘Eurotrip’.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vyj1C8ogtE

Horatio Cornblower

Apparently the Mormon church is big in the Samoas.

I have no idea why, but it doesn’t hurt the O-line.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Can’t be signing a bunch of Pago-Pagans.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

They’re smart enough to prefer them to thin mints

Horatio Cornblower

Keep it up, pal, and I’ll start driving a car powered by coal.

Gumbygirl

Who hurt you with a Girl Scout cookie?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Couple kids from Provo discovered him while they were on their missionary tours and smuggled him into the USA.

Horatio Cornblower

You’re older than me, so you probably remember Doonesbury and Lava Lave Lenny, the Samoan lineman Duke discovers in Samoa.

Viva La Tabula Raza

He left Walden to sign with the LioUns. Whoops.

Horatio Cornblower

Just found out my daughter’s dating a Puerto Rican, and you know what that means…they’re bringing me back empanadas at midnight!

Fuck and yes.

Also I’m eventually going to murder him, but that’s because he’s dating my daughter, not for any ethnic reasons.

litre_cola

Empanadas no matter their iteration are always superb. Late night empanadas are heaven.

herodotus450

Everyone knows “empanadas” is a euphemism for “barnstorming statehood campaign” wake up sheeple!

yeah right

I directly, yet indirectly paid massive homage to our dear departed tWBS today. The oil that i sauteed my green beans in was a ghost pepper infused oil that I made from this ridiculously huge box of peppers that Seamus sent me in the mail last year.

Loved that man and I miss him.

herodotus450

green beans

green

Horatio Cornblower

Just know that, when you’re sitting on the toilet in agony tomorrow, he’s going to be looking down at you and laughing.

Horatio Cornblower

I mean, 50/50 anyway.

yeah right

Tomorrow?

Horatio Cornblower

Sorry, I’m on East Coast time

herodotus450

Rutgers down 2, going for the 2 point conversion with 30 seconds left in the 4th

litre_cola

Why aren’t you watching OANN, or Rebel News (Canadia) so you can get learned?

Horatio Cornblower

FS2 is purporting to show Liga MX play-offs, apparently featuring Montreal vs New England, so congratulations to the Mexican soccer federation on that recent expansion, I guess.

King Hippo

this is why we NEEDED WALL thanks Obama!!!!!1111

litre_cola

I for one accept my new SexiMexi overlords.

Horatio Cornblower

Sounds like my prom

Recovery Whiskey

UW up the gut for 30 yards. XP good. 43-6. Mighty Are The Men

litre_cola

8 hours til Hippo v Litre futbol. At least we will have a happy Hippo going in to the morning NFL slate!

King Hippo

MOAR LIEK unclenched than happy

Recovery Whiskey

UW starts half assing and Zona scores. Doinks the XP. 37-6

litre_cola

Computer couldn’t login for a half an hour. I m home, up alone, drunk, and stoned. I missed you.

Horatio Cornblower

I’ll take ‘Things I Say To My Wife After Stumbling Home At 4 AM From The Nudie Bar’ for $400, Alex’s Successor.

Horatio Cornblower

Other things that aren’t that friendly to the Trojans include Greeks, wooden horses, being kept unused in wallets for months, and being stored on top of radiators.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Pinholes are not looked kindly upon, either.

King Hippo

15-14….exhale

scotchnaut

I haven’t watched a tweaker fixture in forever and I’m not gonna start now. Nighters!

Recovery Whiskey
blaxabbath

Papadilla?

scotchnaut

Don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep

Papadilla don’t preach, I’ve been losing sleep

scotchnaut

Dear Diarrhea:

Game over!

blaxabbath

UA got 51 yards through three quarters.

blaxabbath

Also their defense is not carrying them

Recovery Whiskey

UW kicker Henry continues to audition for Blair Walsh status and pushes a 40 yarder wide. 37-0 Washington

scotchnaut

4th and 5 for MSU

Recovery Whiskey

Touchdown Har Har’s as the Schiano Men slept on the slot receiver. 28-27 Michigan

blaxabbath

Good lord Arizona has an atrocious football program.

Recovery Whiskey

It certainly isn’t a matter of Washington being good

Recovery Whiskey

PI on the Schiano Men in the end zone. But the Harbaughs also got flagged illegal man downfield.

Like we used to say in pickup games— DO OVER

rockingdog

found a funny:

doctor: im afraid u only have a few minutes left to live

me: [sobs] oh my god are u sure

doctor: [pulls out gun] im totally sure

scotchnaut

MSU gonna get one last chance to tie things up.

herodotus450

Their QB is literally named Will Rodgers.

Recovery Whiskey

Morris over the middle to TE Otton. Touchdown Washington. 37-0

rockingdog

comment image

hey guys

scotchnaut

What’s up dawg?

Recovery Whiskey

The men of troy. Whats up douchebags

Viva La Tabula Raza

Did Rensselaer play today?

Last edited 11 days ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Recovery Whiskey

Up 30-0 coach Lake decides to go for 2 and tries a swinging gate trick play. It fails.

King Hippo

Hope going unbeaten gets these Fightin’ Falwells a legit bowl opponent. They’d get their shit pushed in.

Recovery Whiskey

Unless the referees believe in praying the gay away

Horatio Cornblower

Friend of my son’s played for them. Size of a pro wrestler. Lifted terrifying amounts of weight at the gym. Nicest kid you’d ever want to meet. His mother is an extremely religious nut.

herodotus450

Valentino Ambrosio, kicker for Rutgers as well as part time romance novel protagonist.

scotchnaut

I was thinking he was a drink special on Ladies Night but that works as well.

Horatio Cornblower

He can be both; don’t you dare limit his dreams!

scotchnaut

Georgia wr finally caught a ball in end zone on the 4th(?) try.

Recovery Whiskey

Touchdown Washington.

Recovery Whiskey

Wolverine Hawkins injures himself going in head first.

King Hippo

Don’t see staying up until 2:30-ish for Troi Boiz y Team Secular Big Love. Already dreading the 6:30 alarm so I can see me Toffees lose to fookin’ Fulham.

litre_cola

Hell yeah!

Recovery Whiskey

Just realized this is Harbaugh vs Schiano.

scotchnaut

For someone in a coma, Schiano is doing one hell of a job tonight.

King Hippo

I know, I know, it’s seeeeeeeriousssss

Recovery Whiskey

Girlfriend in Tacoma

Horatio Cornblower

You wouldn’t know her.