2020 Quotables – Week 11 (Submissions)

blaxabbath

Happy short week from all of us here at Quotables. Checked out for next 6.5 hours of work? Well, have we got a time waster for you! Take a submission and copy it to the comments below with your favorite caption. Then visit on back to [DFO] on Friday for results! It’s no facing the 0-10 Jets but, still, is good no?

No?

No? Look….


Alright then! Please find below your Week 11 Quotables submissions.


This angle is good because you can watch the involuntary spasms as each CL progressively snaps.

Coach Duchess: “Don’t try to arm tackle these guys,,,,”

Y’all don’t need a primer for this one.

“Oh it can stand up? Damn showoff water bottle…” -J Burrow

Only northeast-based Bird I care about is the one who murdered state witness William Gant.

When life imitates art….

“Six feet!”

[JV] TURNOVER CHAINSAW ACTION!
 

5 2 votes
Article Rating
blaxabbath
blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
Subscribe
Notify of
49 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
LemonJello

comment image

“Mini tractores quaeso parum de potentia increpem te!”

LemonJello

comment image

“Guys…GUYS!! Who left their bottle of clean urine out here on the field?”

LemonJello

comment image

“THAT’S NOT HOW YOU PREP A SHOULDER ROAST!”
-Scotchnaut and Yeah Right, in unison

LemonJello

comment image

Thursday night uniforms and football on a Monday? Fuck you 2020, I’m out!

Game Time Decision

comment image

The bottle is better at blocking than his o line

Duchess

comment image

”And this kids is how KC Masterpiece BBQ sauce is made”

Duchess

comment image
”Excuse me, sir, would you like to donate to the Human Fu….”

Duchess

comment image

Curtis Samuel wowed the judges with his Touchdown Dance entitled ”JFK vs Dallas”

Duchess

comment image
Usually when a kid tackles like this it means his mom will soon be single next year coming to games wearing yoga pants and bringing all the kids Smart Water for half time.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Um, is that the dancing bear at left?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Still not the worst of his stupid fucking commercials

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

“Yeah but where’s the hooker?” – Ryan Fitzpatrick Bateman

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Oh yeah? Mine’s deadlier.

–Brian Kelly, gesturing at a scissor lift

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Coach, i know how to turn a dry rub into a wet rub

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Damn!

SonOfSpam

comment image

Beavers should be all about ax wounds not chainsaws.

SonOfSpam

comment image

6 points for the touchdown and 5 more for the Bironas tribute.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Another touchdown due to Tom Brady’s greatness

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“You can see how badly Mike Evans wanted to get that touchdown for his quarterback.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

“Wow, those guys really know how to use their hands!”

–Robert Kraft, shifting in his seat

SonOfSpam

comment image

Seeing a bird get blasted that hard in the face by a Chubb reminds me of Sophie Dee.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Stephanie Swift for me, but a rock solid comment either way

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Is he playing a videogame, bobsledding, or having a seizure?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

When did Carson Wentz start playing defense?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

Kimo von Oelhoffen is impressed by the FedEx Turf

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

[is triggered] – former Jacksonville punter Chris Hanson

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

“Want to see my ‘guy trying to tackle Derrick Henry’ impression?” – #95

Last edited 1 month ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

“That kind of weaksauce handshake will never fly here. I’m sorry, but we have *standards* here at Fort Stupendous…” – Elisha, peering out from between the couch cushions

Last edited 1 month ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Redshirt

ezgif.com-gif-maker-26-3.gif (500×281) (doorfliesopen.com)

“Listen. Do you hear? That is the Sound of Ultimate Suffering. My heart made that sound when the six-fingered man slaughtered my father. Cincinnati sports fans make it now...yet again.” – I. Montoya, Florin

Last edited 1 month ago by Redshirt
Game Time Decision

comment image

rusty chainsaw > running chainsaw*

For insults only

Game Time Decision

comment image

…And you shake it all about
You do the hokey pokey
And you turn yourself around
That’s what it’s all about

You put your whole self in….

Downfield Matriculator

comment image

We’ve secretly replaced the Rams’ secondary with canisters of Folger’s Crystals wearing football pads. . . let’s see if anyone notices.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

Aw, it’s sweet of Travis Kelce to pay tribute to Angela Merkel on the 15th anniversary of her becoming Chancellor of Germany.

/seriously, it literally was her 15th anniversary two days ago.

SonOfSpam

#neverforget
comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

comment image

Apparently #31’s strategy of yelling at Evans until he collapsed in a pile of shattered self-confidence didn’t work out.

Downfield Matriculator

Yeah, not as mean as the stuff Jonathan Allen apparently said to Burrow’s knee

Game Time Decision

comment image

[vomits, curls up in pain holding knee]
You wanted me to comment about what now?

Last edited 1 month ago by Game Time Decision
ArmedandHammered

comment image

C’mon Coach, let me eat at your house for Thanksgiving! I will even bring my own bbq ribs.

Downfield Matriculator

Hank Stram: Matriculate the Ball down the field!
Andy Reid: Manipulate my neck for a meal?

Gumbygirl

You get a plus one for working your own user name in!

Downfield Matriculator

Thx — A&H’s comment inspired me and sorry for not responding sooner. Guess that makes me a bit . . . umm . . . Pokey?

ArmedandHammered

comment image

The power of Jim Brown compels you! Sit Down!

Last edited 1 month ago by ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

comment image

No locked co-ed doors will stop me tonight!

Last edited 1 month ago by ArmedandHammered