Your “Um… What?” Wednesday Afternoon’s Last Week’s Thursday Night Football Game Open Thread

Whilst many hot-takers are pouring shit all over the good (huh?) folks of Baltimore and their football team, Who could have seen this happening during a pandemic, really? I choose to admire the power that the Ravens have over the league. Not only have they embarrassed said league by forcing them to re-schedule this tilt three times, the Ravens have 1) caused another Thursday game to get canceled 2) created a Monday night doubleheader 3) sprung into being another Tuesday night game. All this while dragging the Steelers and their fans along in their powerful wake. Very nice flex, Baltimore Ravens.

TO THE GAME!

Ravens/Steelers:

-Ingram and Dobbins are out of Covid but not in uniform. That might have something to do with not having practiced for ten days and that was a smart thing for their team to do. Had either one gotten injured a hellfire of vitriol would have rained down on the team. (not that they aren’t accustomed to it by now)

-So it’s Gus The Bus-his nickname seems awfully familiar-Time today. His last two vs Pitt he’s done 217 yards and a TD. Who will be blocking for him? No one knows.

-Speaking of being bereft of knowledge, with Edwards, Ricard and Boyle all out for various reasons, I’ve not a clue as to who will pretend to play the tight end spot. The punter? The waterboy/girl? Will a coin be flipped?

-RG3 gets the nod and it doesn’t look as though it will be pretty but given how badly Lamar’s passing stats have regressed maybe a change will do the team a good. Though PFF’s passing matchups chart gives Marquise Brown -9% vs Joe Hayden, Dez Bryant is -21% vs Steve Nelson and Devin Duvernay is -infinity vs Cam Sutton.

-It’s Important to Share: Steelers wr’s Claypool, JuJu and Johnson all have between 559 and 535 yards receiving.

-Conner is out, Snell is in but likely won’t do that much damage. Pitt’s offensive DVOA when running the ball is ranked 29th in the league. Who’ll bet that this stat will bite them on the bum when they’re trying to run out the clock in a tight playoff game?

-No, it’s The Ben Pass Show. It’s mostly quick slants underneath and fades/back shoulder passes outside the numbers when they get single coverage. As a Giants goofball, I wonder what it would be like to have wr’s that can separate from defenders.

-Just heard that Pouncey is out for the game.

Welp, enjoy the spectacle of the NFL playing a game on a sunny (here) Wednesday afternoon.

 

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jjfozz

If anyone has a large to extra large pipe wrench laying around, stop on over and fucking club me to death with it. Thanks in advance.

Doktor Zymm

Oh man, how did we ever without the internet? MY LIFE IS RICHER FOR ALL THE DUMB CRAP I NOW KNOW EXISTS
https://www.reddit.com/r/copypasta/comments/7qn75k/poop_knife_from_reddit/?utm_source=amp&utm_medium&utm_content=post_body

Gumbygirl

I’m so glad I read this!

Redshirt

“After reviewing the play, for crying out loud, lets just end this game so we can move on with this cluster of a season. First down!”

Gumbygirl

Next year we could have all of the Watt bros, JJ, TJ and what’s his name, Cooper!

Mother Puncher

The nice thing about it getting dark so early is that I can piss in my backyard pretty much whenever

WCS

I’ve just peed out the window for decades.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Well fuck. Had phone meetings and went to physical therapy; got home and tuned in just in time to see the last two kneel downs. Why not night game? Fuckers.

Gumbygirl

Christmas tree lighting at Rockefeller Center. What’s the spread on that?

Doktor Zymm

O/U 74.5 feet

Redshirt

Should I start Hanukkah Harry or the Grinch?

Gumbygirl

The Grinch. He’s got a big heart. And basketball hands.

Doktor Zymm

METNALLY BRAIN NO EASY
-THE BEN

Horatio Cornblower

OK, that’s it for Week 12 in the NFL.

Don’t forget to tune in tomorrow for the start of Week 13!

Mr. Ayo

Do we tell him now? Or just let him figure it out tomorrow night?

Gumbygirl

Winner winner Yinzer dinner!

WCS

Speaking of, time to make some sloppy joes.

Gumbygirl

You should have tater tots with that, according to the Michelin Guide.

King Hippo

Also, I feel a cold coming on. Hang tight, maybe I will be the first in Clubhouse to visit #NuAIDS2: Electric Boogaloo!

Doktor Zymm

How often do they recalibrate the $20 worth of chain they use to decide these things?

King Hippo

Because one can possibly see on replay whether to nudge the ball 0.5 cm ahead? JEEBUS.

Doktor Zymm

Funny how a significant bout of plague leads to quite a few Ravens sideline personnel wearing N95s

Gumbygirl

Didn’t they say everyone has to wear one if they aren’t wearing a helmet?

Doktor Zymm

Did they? That’s some BS when there’s still a PPE shortage in hospitals.

Gumbygirl

I thought it was a new rule, but who knows?

Doktor Zymm

No on on PITT has one, and it looks like some of the Ravens have surgical masks, so if it is a new rule, must not be fully implemented yet

WCS

Jesus Christ. Are the Harbaugh brothers sharing the same mindset?

Horatio Cornblower

Rothlisberger consistently getting away with dumb shit like that (and, you know, rape), is all the proof I need that we live in a godless universe.

WCS

I disagree. God just said, “Nevermind, that was a mistake somewhere in the Middle Ages.”

Redshirt

My solace is the fact that his place in Hell is already reserved and he’ll spend eternity being the one thrown into the bathroom.

Mother Puncher

Jesus. Not expecting the run there?

Gumbygirl

They are trying to kill me.

clint greasewood

Trace McSorley > Taysom Hill

SonOfSpam

Maybe create a super Whytebrid QB named Traysom McSorhill.

Dunstan

About 20 NFL teams just put him on their draft board.

SonOfSpam

MOAR LIEK MCSCORELEY

Doktor Zymm

This McSorley ain’t bad, but I still prefer the bar in NYC with the horseradishiest mustard