And you shall have him, Chase Young. Hopefully more than a few times. Very few folks expect Washington to come out of this on top but there are some avenues to grabbing the W. Of course, a number of variables must line up and if they do and it’s a close game in the end, Brady will get a call going his way. Crap! Totally forgot about that! Anyway…
TO THE GAME!
Bucs/Team:
-Tampa/Brady comes into this game en fuego. After their week 13 bye they smashed everyone but that was against the likes of Detroit, Minny and Atlanta (X2). Those defensing units are all suck teamified. As a matter of fact, the Bucs have all of 1(!) win vs teams that are over .500 and that was way back in week 6.
-As of this writing Taylor “Kegs Up!” Heinicke is getting the start as Alex Smith’s calf is ‘still sore’ and hasn’t ‘loosened up’. Call me bananas, but I think I’d prefer the journeyman in over an immobile Smith. There’s not a lot to go on but Heinicke did run throw at a 60+ rate and of course his yards per pass attempt number was better than Smith’s. He also used his wheels three times for 22 yards in his week 16 start. Were they designed runs or scrambles though? Well, if you’re expecting me to watch Team/Panthers highlights, I don’t get paid enough for that.
-Is There Hope In Symmetry? When the Bucs o-line faced a top 5 d-line this year they graded out as a bottom five unit after each game. Old Tommy Boy grades out as being 28th out of 42 qualifying qb’s when under pressure. Given the talent on Team’s d-line, they don’t need to sell out on the blitz in order to exert pressure on qb’s.
-Given all the weapons at his disposal in the passing game, I’m sure Arians is going to test Team’s secondary early, try to get two early scores and glide home.
-Washington’s O, being the abysmal unit that it is, should focus on McKissic and te Logan as that is the Bucs two biggest weaknesses. Tampa has given up more passes to rb’s than any other team in the league.
-To me, Team’s only hope is to get one or more scores from a punt/kick return or an interception/fumble because they’re likely to bog down quite a bit. Should they win I’m guessing their field goal kicker will be team MVP.
Do your thing.
Regardless of the game my next fantasy team name is Nutsack Heart Attack.
At friends house. Haven’t seen one playoff game this weekend. Regretting life’s choices.
gonna be regretting more if you find out your friend doesn’t social distance.
seriously dude, stay safe
They believe in social distancing and may be the only people in Ohio not to be hit or have a COVID-19 scare. I’m still protected by antibodies but I’m still wearing a mask if I go outside. Thanks for concern though.
Team beating Brady would be delicious.
Finger-lickin’ good!
Like Robert Johnson, Brady sold his soul to the Devil down at the crossroads long ago.
As delicious as being dealt two 8s versus a dealer 16, and you split and get another 8 and you split and get another 8 and you split and get another 8…
How many decks are in this blackjack hand?
I’ve played tables where they have six decks, so it’s possible.
My man Heinicke sure is marching tonight in Washington.
Wait, I’m being told I can no longer say this.
All fun and games up there for you isnt it???
.
.
.
.
.
Can I stay at your place until the 21st?
Pullout’s ready, my dude. Lady Maestro might be caught a little offguard but a few minutes with Baby Shark and she’ll be on board.
i really don’t give a shit if he keeps playing like this
He does a hell of a break job.
That’s some good skunked beer!
That’s quite a run.
That hurdle didn’t work, no?
Amazon Web Services is booting Parler.
–
LIBERTARIANS: Let the free market decide!
FREE MARKET: [decides]
LIBERTARIANS: Not like that!
Libertarians: We should listen to Adam Smith and believe in the power of the free market!
Adam Smith: The power of capitalism is a mechanism for the State to corral the base instincts of individuals for the benefit of society.
Libertarians: Not that part.
i love pissing off my college friends by saying libertarians are just “hipster Republicans”.
their unwillingness to call trump out validates every negative stereotype about them.
many if them still don’t understand ron Swanson was parody
I usually go with “Republicans who like to smoke pot,” but yeah.
I do wonder exactly how the Libertarian Party ended up full of those sorts of people and so far away from the philosophy of libertarianism
Because they don’t like being alone.
What I find most impressive about libertarians is just how well-versed all of them are in the difference in age-of-consent laws in various jurisdictions across the globe.
I do feel kind of bad for my left-lib friends, but not that bad since they could have made more of an effort to point out stuff like the fact that nazis can’t be libertarian
Nihilists: fat and happy. Missed the election completely.
What’s mine is mine.
Pornhub search for Balls, I reckon.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xltk859iHcE
just cuz I’m bored and these have always been hilarious
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4yhOQZGLU8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1g0ml-Nctgs
Is Heinicke the first high school kid ever to play in the NFL playoffs?
Given the generic-ness of the WFT’s name, I feel they should adopt new uniform colors, B&W, like so:
Real talk: we actually have this in Canada. It costs a dollar a bottle. It’s honestly pretty good for what it costs.
There used to be a brand in Switzerland called 99f Beer
We used to drink that occasionally in college. It really wasn’t substantially worse than any other large macrobrew.
My go-to college cheap beer was Schaeffer Light.
“Schaeffer
Is the
One beer to have
When you’re having more than one!”
I direct you to Senor in China with Taiwan’s The Beer, found at your airport 7-11.
Somewhere today I saw
“Lost the presidency, lost the House, and lost the Senate to Democrats. Guess Trump DID Make America great again.”
Democrats also suck though. Just several orders of magnitude less than Republicans.
I mean, I guess there’s some snowball-in-hell chance that Bernie’s going to use his position as the 50th Senator to extract some meaningful policy reform, but I’d bet the the Biden/Harris Democrats would rather seek out “moderate” Republican votes than give the DemSocProg wing any leverage.
I feel that the status quo that we had under the Dems (Obama etc), although not optimal, was much more tolerable than the status quo under Trump. But that’s just me.
For sure. But if we could slice out Obama’s presidency from being sandwiched between two Republican disasters, like… what would you really rate it out of 10? A 7? Where does he come in in a ranking of US presidents ever? And this is the guy whose feet the Democratic Party still worships at. Obama didn’t, and I don’t think Biden will, stop the downslide the US is on.
Again, the Republicans are way worse, in that they’re actively trying to crash the damn country, but the Democrats seem happy to just let the autopilot guide the plane into a mountain.
We need ranked choice voting and a feasible system for third party candidates. Agreed that both parties suck, with the Dems sucking significantly less
To be clear, when I say the Democrats suck, I also think that the Democratic Party is the only place where I see any hope for the US in AOC, Bernie, Warren, Omar, Markey, etc.. It’s just that the institution of the Democratic Party seems more concerned about keeping them out of power internally than anything.
Other than that, the breadth of mainstream US political ideas runs from “hey look at that iceberg!” to “here’s some gasoline and a fiddle, have at it!”
They’re politicians. They are of a scum scraped from beneath the lowest of toilet bowls. They just choose different methods of scaring people into voting for them. Vote Bender 2024.
Eh, I have a lot less faith than you. While I think that branch of dems is asking the right questions, i’ve yet to hear them propose any policies that would address those issues in any even slightly functional way. It’s all optics and middle class giveaways. And it’s not the party that’s keeping them out of power, it’s the fact that they only have the support of about 1/3rd of registered Democrats. They should certainly have a voice within the party, but they’re not a majority or even a plurality, and they won’t lead until they are
The Green New Deal was a thing. The Consumer Protection Agency was a thing. Medicare for all is a thing. I’m not super-keen on some of Warren’s tech anti-trust stuff – because a lot of the corporations crushing Americans right now aren’t tech companies – but it’s in the right direction.
I don’t think they have all the answers, but they’re the only people I’ve heard with any answers.
The fact that the US population doesn’t support them is a whole other thing and why I also agree that the US is largely locked into a permanent decline from here on out. I know Biden beat Bernie. I also know that Bernie’s ideas are better than Biden’s. I don’t know what’s to be done about the fact that Americans, even the left-leaning ones, continually choose bad ideas over good ones.
They are things, yes, but other than the Consumer Protection Agency, which was started under Obama, they aren’t things which would have positive effects as written. I would never vote for them with their current policies, since we’re only going to have one chance (if that) to fix most of this stuff and I’m not willing to throw it away on such obviously flawed plans
I don’t think there are perfect policy plans, and even if there were, the closer a policy plan was to perfect, the more opposed to it the US populace would likely be.
I don’t think you’re ever gonna get your one chance, so I don’t know what else to do/hope for.
Probably not, although I am encouraged by the success Yang saw in the primaries. He’s by far the closest to a functional solution. Most of Bernie’s proposals would be counterproductive, which is far worse than simply not perfect, and ditto with Warren, although I can’t be sure what she would actually propose if she wasn’t competing with Bernie
No one here gets out alive.
I don’t know if that’s Anna Kendrick, or just a reasonable facsimile, but either way, I approve.
its her
Looks like she could use a bit of shampoo.
So far no major surprises today, and I suspect Team will not provide one in half numero six.
Some Halftime entertainment
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3X1bc4kNLHI
I just realized that this game is on NBC and it’s not Al and Cris calling it. Guess I know who’s calling NBC’s game tomorrow.
How the fuck ya doin?
Better than the Jaguars under Tom Coughlin
Unpacked yet…lol
Nope. We headed to the Cape since we have a bed down here. Heading back tomorrow (with air mattress in tow) to begin that process in earnest.
Where downacape?
—Native-born Masshole.
Harwich. We rent the house out in the summer, but keep it winterized so we can head down on random weekends.
Used to go eeling in the Dennis tidal flats, I think we might have had some lunch occasionally in Harwich. Over 50 years ago, so I can’t nail that down.
Nice. Both my parents are from here, so most of my time was spent outer cape in Orleans, Eastham & Wellfleet.
Mansfield, just east of Foxboro, is my ancestral home. Used to spend a lot of time at Scusset, Sagamore, and Dennis as a kid.
Spend more time down in RI when I visit now, Cape is just too fucking crowded. Don’t want to spend six hours of my vacation in a traffic jam on 6, 6A or 28.
Thats why we come down in the shoulder and off seasons. Way less busy.
I prefer winter beach visits, because I hate people. Me and my GF spent Thanksgiving a few years ago at a B&B in Provincetown. I love the desolation, as it were.
Nawt a fumble
This is my favoUrite song on the radio right now. Not that anyone asked, mind.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjr11lGEBg4
When did they start playing Idles on the radio? I thought they were cool
afaik, 3 weeks ago (satellite radio only)
Just waiting for bread to bake.
but I’m Santana moss!
I’m Carlos Santana!!!
-Trent Green
/standing in pool of his own urine
Tyler Heineke may not be good, but he has a great quarterback pre snap voice
I figure thats why Tyson was so tough. Lots of practice beating up kids that made fun of him
Imagine being one of those kids and getting a call out of the blue one day fifteen years later that Mike Tyson would like to have lunch with you.
You know, I just remembered that it was Otto Man who got me watching Mike Tyson Mysteries.
It’s funny because had the timing worked out differently I bet he’d have voiced Drederick Tatum on the Simpsons.
Fuck the Ottomans.
—Mustafa Kemal Ataturk
a qb able to hit wide open receivers, what a concept for washington.
Really? This is the guy they use for color commentary?
Hey, MRSA Dreamboat’s cock ain’t gonna suck itself.
Apparently Dungy got so used to eating Brady’s ass during his coaching career that he grew to like the taste.
Stockholm Syndrome
Network wanted sanguine takes.
/bows, blows kiss
i can’t get over the fact a cop getting bludgeoned with a fucking fire extinguisher isn’t pissing more people off.
i get there’s a shit load of hypocrisy with trump supporters but still jesus
I mean, on the other hand, a lady holding a don’t tread on me flag got trampled to death, and another guy gave himself a heart attack by tasering his own balls.
Irony and karma are off to a tremendous start in 2021
A black person does that, we are under martial law until 2040.
Yeah, that blows my mind too. They haven’t even flown the White House flags at half mast.
Him: “I’m gonna find me some new pussy”
Her: “If you had two more inches of dick, you could’ve found some new pussy here!”
“Two inches? That’s a whole ‘nother dick!” — Brett F.
Military graffiti in the head:
“The lieutenant’s wife is real tight once you get past the used part.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHQb7JT6_zU
if i get any more bored I’m gonna go through all my sexy pics for the week
If you want to get through the week, be careful you don’t blow your load… uh, sorry, phrasing
its definitely happened before….
i mean uh phrasing!!
I like her smile.
YES, I noticed those shoulders.
/but my heart belongs to Nicolle Wallace, especially when she stares disapprovingly through her reading glasses
sarcasm aside, a good smile is definitely a great quality in terms of attractiveness.
few things thing turn me off a woman faster that shit ton of plastic surgery that makes em look like barbie’s twin that should’ve died in the womb
and don’t even get me started on the first lady
1980s porn-star-wise she is the equivalent of a boob job that looks like plumber’s helper with the handles removed.
bless technology and science!
except for lip filler. that shit is a slight against god
Ok, Ben’s Chili Bowl is legit good.
Woo hoo! Game on. Cmoooon Team D.
Promoting James Deen is frowned upon
Boy, Washington has some nice looking uniforms don’t they? They should keep the numbers on the helmet when/if they get a new name. I like Washington Bullets. I think it’s available.
Washington Coup-Coups
The special people? I wasn’t referring to the capitol calamity with the bullets name, I just really like it and am irked that it was changed for sensitivity reasons. Bullets, that is. Not the slur.
Agreed. Violent nicknames are GREAT. Just not raycess ones.
Exactly. What is a Raider or a Viking but a rapist with a flag? Also, as a they from danish descent, I must object to the continued portrayal of my people as violent marauders. Purple people eaters, please.
Deuce coups
Mike Love and the Asshole side of the Beach Boys would sue.
Second shot at yeah right’s James beard’s chicken + 40 cloves.
I’m feeling bullish.
.
That looks good. Now I’m starving.
I really enoy that dish.
Garlic is amazing. I can’t count how many times (pre-pandemic) someone would say “what are you cooking, it smells great,” and the truth is that all I’ve done is start sauteeing some garlic.
Got a garlic-and-oregano-coated leg of lamb in the oven now. Just threw in some potatoes, and brussell sprouts going in soon.
Dick.
And on my own comment tree…..
(Enjoy that lamb)
Ha, sorry — the chicken looks good!
I have leftover halushki and some cod I’ll make a pan sauce for. Have to work up the ambition!
Wow! Absolutely no one gives a shit about this game…
Yeah, I thought the last game’s thread was quiet for a playoff game….
DIONK
Succop suckedop!
Tom Brady coming to town is the worst thing to happen to Washington all year.
aaaannnnnddddd TV box off
“After 8 years, the mission is over. But other missions lie ahead.”
I looked up immediately, wondering if the US was announcing an invasion of another country in a commercial during a football game.
Really. After 8 years, you’re almost halfway to retirement. Maybe he’s a SEAL that committed some war crimes and has to get out before court martial.
he wants to be at the next coup attempt
its a shame tom Brady isn’t a patriot any more or else he’d feel compelled to give washing a feel good win here
Heinecke will not be muffled!
So, I’m considering my next show-I-never-watched to dig into. Anybody seen Downton Abbey?
I really liked it.
It is pretty much what you expect it to be — the “problems” of a bunch of Edwardian aristocrats. But it’s well-acted, with snappy dialogue and good acting and costumes and sets and purty women.
I was going to binge some more Fargo or Better Call Saul, but I am just not in the mood for heavy violence at this time.
Ted Lasso
Will look into, although I don’t have Apple TV. Thank you.
Downton is definitely low stakes, at least from a modern perspective. “Oh no, who will Lady so-and-so marry” is important to the characters but pretty chill for a modern viewer.
Any chance both teams lose here?
Let’s say Bucs win, but Brady gets a career ending injury from Chase.
Would that count?
Team meteor
Yes, I like the redacteds tonight, why do you ask?
A Washington win would be great, but I think these Rams used up all the underdog juju.
Could be Chase Young’s definition game. That’d be tits.
Chase Young is going to maul the pigshit out of Dreamboat tonight.
Antonio Fucking Gibson. Your life is calling.
Hard decision to make here: cheer for a Brady loss, or against Dan Snyder?
Best-case scenario is Brady injury, backup leads the Bucs to injury.
You said injury twice.
Alex wishes that was the upper limit.
Ha, I was so wrapped up in “Brady injury = good” that I think my brain substituted “injury” for “victory.”
Also, bourbon.
“I like injuries.”
I’d prefer to wait until the Buccs get to face the Saints, and Jameis Winston can blow Brady out of the Superdome.
I gave up on the other game. Fucking Charmslinger losing to a qb with 4 fingers.
“That’s still one more than you really need.” — Jason Pierre-Paul
Yeah, some days the bar eats you.