• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - July 24, 2020July 24, 2020

105

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – NIGHT The PRODUCER is splayed out on the couch, drenched in sweat, after having spent the last two hours dancing.  PRODUCER: [mopping his brow] Wow, that was kind of fun. DJ 3000: YES, AND IT DID A GOOD JOB KEEPING YOUR METABOLISM ACTIVE. PRODUCER: Great!  I...hey, why does it

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - July 17, 2020July 18, 2020

225

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT The PRODUCER is sitting on the ground, leaning back up against the wall.  Next to him is a series of plastic bottles - thirteen of them contain two ounces of a cloudy liquid, and three of them are empty.  DJ 3000 produced a chiming noise. DJ 3000: IT'S

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - July 3, 2020July 3, 2020

210

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER lies on his side on the couch, snoring heavily.  He is hugging to his chest a large jar that is half-full of a clear(ish) liquid.  The distillation apparatus he has built has clearly been deemed as "operational".   DJ 3000: [throws a blanket over him] YOU

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - June 26, 2020June 26, 2020

199

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER is puttering around the studio, assembling a Rude Goldberg-looking construction out of various office materials.  He is humming the tune from the Jimmy Buffet song "Coconut Telegraph" to himself.  DJ 3000 sits silently, updating his operating system. DJ 3000: [Configuring update - 35% complete] The PRODUCER

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - June 19, 2020June 19, 2020

65

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY We join our regularly scheduled programming already in progress... DREW BREES: ...and then Marques says "that's not a snake, that's Junior Galette's belt!" PRODUCER: Ha ha ha ha ha! DREW: Ha ha ha ha ha! DJ 3000: HA HA HA HA HA! PRODUCER: Great story, Drew.  I have to say, being

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - June 5, 2020June 5, 2020

131

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER sits on the floor of studio, tinkering with a long piece of pipe, a bunch of empty beer bottles, and a hammer.  He loads several of the beer bottles into a cloth grocery bag, and raises the hammer. DJ 3000: SO...WHATCHA DOIN? PRODUCER: The stores won't

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - May 29, 2020May 29, 2020

89

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER is bustling around the office, humming merrily to himself.  DJ 3000 is in his usual place on the side of the room, the lights on his console blinking slowly but calmly.   DJ 3000: I HAVE TO SAY IT IS REASSURING TO SEE YOU BEHAVING MORE

• DFOing Good

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly - May 15, 2020May 15, 2020

101

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The studio sits empty.  The PRODUCER is nowhere to be seen.   DJ 3000: [sighs] DJ 3000: [to database] <?php $potential_topics = mysql_query("SELECT topic FROM request_line_database WHERE published = 'false'"); if (!$potential_topics) { echo 'Could not run query: ' . mysql_error(); exit; } $topic_array = best($potential_topics); echo $topic_array[0] ?> DJ 3000: NO, I KNOW HE'S SAVING THAT ONE FOR WHEN HE ACTUALLY HAS HIS SHIT TOGETHER ENOUGH TO INTRODUCE IT PROPERLY. DJ 3000: