Your “Have Some ResPEK” Open Thread

Don T - January 26, 2020January 27, 2020

228

At work today, I got distracted on the Web looking for glues with the most intoxicating bouquet. And then, “Kobe Bryant Dies in a Helicopter Crash” popped up. The first thing I thought of was Bryant ravaging NBA defenses like AIDS inside Roy Cohn, and then the Colorado rape allegations.

Stick It to The Man – 2020 New Year’s Eve Open Thread

Open Threads

Don T - December 31, 2019December 31, 2019

129

Yep. 2019 was a year of upheaval and rebellion. Here's some highlights, starting with the Colin Kaepernick workout. The NFL threw Kaep a bone—well, actually, the bone was shot out of a bazooka aimed at his head. With zero anticipation, the league foisted the tryout for a midseason Saturday. From the

Commentist Beer Barrel: Heineken

Don T - December 6, 2019December 6, 2019

Heineken is an amoral mercantile outfit that appropriated the Red Star. Still, please: put down your pitchforks and torches, because I like their beer. Per Wikipedia: Heineken Lager Beer (Dutch: Heineken Pilsener)—wait. Is Heineken a Pilsener or lager? The bottle says “lager”, which settles the issue. At least for me, because I’m not

Facts Crush Precious Delusions: 2019 Titans Bye Report

DFOing Good

Don T - November 20, 2019November 20, 2019

My Titans preview was an unhinged mash note to Marcus Mariota. I stand by it. Emotional stability is not a personal goal. The good news are that Tennessee is 5-5, which ain’t insurmountable in the AFC playoff race, and Mariota enters Week 12 healthy. And rested AF. [shakes head, lights cig] It was

You Philistines Don’t Deserve Marcus MarioTa – Titans 2019 Preview

Team Previews

Don T - August 28, 2019August 28, 2019

A lot to unpack there! First, hey Fox: fuck you for the misspelling. I’m gonna speculate that the graphics guy was an older feller who thought “Sounds like Torretta, Ruthless Posse WOOO”, and didn’t name check out of self-satisfaction (“I can’t be racist, I know Italians!”). Too much? Listen, you misspell

Your Pretexts And Excuses Sunday Open Thread

Don T - August 4, 2019August 4, 2019

106

There’s only a handful of Sundays left until the return of the massive zombie-in that is the NFL season. The spirit soars at the thought of Sundays glued to 10+ hours of NFL games, which gets you 48 net minutes of NFL action and a lifetime of rancor from “neglected”

Guay Referendum: 2019 Copa América Day 3

Don T - June 16, 2019June 16, 2019

175

Today is the debut of Paraguay and Uruguay in the Copa América. Fish out of sand Qatar takes on Paraguay and the better Guay (YMMV) takes Ecuador. But let’s acknowledge the significance of this day. Via giphy.com Happy Vasectomy Awareness Day, reprobates. The smell of baby powder makes me squirm like a vampire

Bite Me: Uruguay 2019 Copa América Preview

Don T - June 10, 2019June 10, 2019

Lips near each other, no teeth showing: perfect form for a kiss. That was in 2011, the last time Uruguay won the Copa América. Incidentally, that was the last Copa in which Luis Suárez played. He will play in this one; chomp on that, folks. There have been 43 Copa Américas

Hot and Unstable: Argentina 2019 Copa América Preview

Don T - June 4, 2019June 4, 2019

Prodigious resources wasted by incompetent narcissists: that’s Argentina. But enough about politics. Let’s talk fútbol. In the last World Cup, Argentina had one of the more STACKT rosters but were buried under coach Jorge Sampaoli, a clueless diva whose main talent was out-asshole-ing himself. “Smurfs! I HATE SMURFS!” (traslation mine) In Russia 2018,

Losers No More! Champions League Final Open Thread

Don T - June 1, 2019June 1, 2019

It’s the biggest game of club fútbol and we’re getting the equivalent of a Vikings – Bills Superb Owl. "Can I deesterb you for a moment to ask if you would hold these two beers for me please", asks Jürgen Klopp to Marv Levy, for losing SIX finals. For Tottenham,

Bend Over for Banks? NEVAH

DFOing Good

Don T - May 18, 2019May 18, 2019

Once upon a time, until 10:00 DFO / Central time today, I was a homeowner. My Ex and I had moved out to separate places by the start of the 2018 NFL season. POINT IS: the home’s mortgage was KILLIN’ me. Christ what a scam. It’s the Herbalife of finance.