There were three fixtures played yesterday. Well, two fixtures and a woodchipper feeding. [Closed Captioning for the Hard of Hippo provided by the Church of the Immaculate Deception, Rev. E. Mayhem] Humps [Colts] and Bills [Wooooooo!] was actually quite compelling. [Woooooooooooo!] You had two analytics-friendly coaches, who had the bollocks to...coach that
Good day, imaginary peoples. It's REALLY here. The day we gets a TRIPLEHEADER of Wild Card, Bitches! action. And it happens again tomorrow! We just needed a world-wide pandemic to make it real. [slaps #NuAIDS on the ass, HARD!] But first, we have a wacky Lesser Morning, with pretty much every match on
Fuck you, wake up already. That vomit ain't safe to have during slumber. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGEmFpitjYw We can has Derby! Fronk's Hammers (sounds DIRTY!) travel to Fortress Goodison to face Hippo's Toffees (12:30, NBCSN). A win would bring Everton to within ONE lousy point of assdicks Liverpool and we must not let Dour (Formerly) Ginger
Here comes the deliriously jam-packed Premiership Festivus period, with the added entropy that is #NuAIDS. A good opportunity to see some of your favoUrite side's depth options! You're not setting your alarm to watch the German Elton John kick the tar shit (and whine incessantly) out of Uncle Woy's ti-wud Pawace.
Hey howdy, y'all. Hope you are wallowing in your shame like a good Commentist should. Let's talk some FITBAW!! Sparta Prague completed Celtic's utter humiliation, bouncing them from the NIT Shempions League. Two late goals bloated the scoreline all the way to 4-1. Ouchy the fook ouch! Celtic are fuckweasels, plus
Because moneys speak louder than public health (and thank FUCK for that, amirite??), we finally have sommet like a full Saturday slate. Praise be! But don't forget about Premiership Banana Puddings time, first! The Mighty Blues of Everton are in first position (assuming Villa lost yesterday, which I will presume #HAILGAMBLOR),
God help me, but I think Everton actually goes into this Derby matchup with a puncher's chance (7:30, NBCSN). The Redshite will no doubt be focused after their 7-2 thrashing away to Villa...but thhat veneer of invincibility has faded. More importantly, Don Carlo has this bunch of Toffees believing in