Marty Mornhinweg’s Wacky Weapons

Your Thursday “Asleep-At-the-Switch” Carpenter Thread

WCS -
29

Ahoy-yoy!   I realized I never did a Stillers bye week report, but who cares. They're 7-6, will never beat the Patriots in any meaningful way, the offensive is broken to hell, and are somehow in currenth #6th seed. Tomlin Voodoo is real, ya'll. Just accept this. This season has been so

Marty Mornhinweg’s Wacky Weapons: Project Habakkuk

The Maestro -
7

Spring is here, which means that it's time for me to whip my high-school team into shape for the upcoming football season. Never too early to get started, really - who cares about baseball? It just gets in the way of Oklahoma drills. As the winter ice melts, my excitement

Marty Mornhinweg’s Wacky Weapons: Project Blue Peacock

The Maestro -
10

You know what's scary these days? The New England Patriots. Actually, scratch that. They're always scary. You know what else is scary? Nukes. I feel like somehow we don't talk about that enough these days. Some people remember back when there were fallout drills and stuff in school. Today's kids

Marty Mornhinweg’s Wacky Weapons: Anti-Tank Dogs

The Maestro -
42

Oh, man's best friend. It's been tough waiting for the phone to ring some days... you never know when that next head coaching gig is going to come from. A positive attitude and tons of patience are two essential parts of the waiting process. You know who's patient? Dogs. Gotta

Marty Mornhinweg’s Wacky Weapons: Animal Bombs

The Maestro -
33

People talk about coaches' ability to control the locker room, and how it's an important one. Some people say I never did that so well. I call bullshit on them. You know what's hard to control? Animals. Football players are comparatively a walk in the park to work with, especially