Facts Crush Precious Delusions: 2019 Titans Bye Report

My Titans preview was an unhinged mash note to Marcus Mariota. I stand by it. Emotional stability is not a personal goal. The good news are that Tennessee is 5-5, which ain’t insurmountable in the AFC playoff race, and Mariota enters Week 12 healthy. And rested AF. [shakes head, lights cig] It was

Wangs of New York: Your 2019 Buffalo Bills Bye Week Bonanza

[Interior. Press Room at the Meadowlands. JOSH ALLEN is at the podium, answering questions after beating the New York "Football" "Giants".] ANONYMOUS PR FLACK: Ok guys, we've got time for one more question. SNOTTYASS MOTHERFUCKING REPORTER FOR THE NEW YORK POST OR SOME SHIT: There's a chance you could have ended up

Go Home, Fate, You’re Drunk: 2019 Detroit Lions at the Bye

[INTERIOR, STAGE WITH CLOSED CURTAIN. From offstage, muffled and slurred shouts are heard, mostly inaudible but include variations on "Not goin' outthere!" and "You an whose army, cock-knocker?"] [Eventually, REVEREND MAYHEM is shoved through the curtain and stumbles into frame, one hand clutching a bottle of brown liquid labeled "JJ Fozz

Huh…..: Your San Francisco 49ers Bye Week Update

DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!??!?!? YES!!!! Friends, I have preached before at interminable length about how we live in  The New Time of Wonders. Now BLEERGH!, Shan'khlor and the other Elderly Gods have seen fit to show us another Sign and Portent. Yes, it is Week 4, and Jimmy Garoppolo's bones and tendons

Elite vs Delete…Ravens at the Bye

Hey, remember three weeks ago when the Ravens were 4-2 and leading the division? Yeah, they don't remember either.  No one does. There's a reason for that. Not only have the Ravens gone on a 3 game losing streak since then, but they also have the worst record in division games in the