Request Line: Indecision

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER is bustling around the office, humming merrily to himself.  DJ 3000 is in his usual place on the side of the room, the lights on his console blinking slowly but calmly.   DJ 3000: I HAVE TO SAY IT IS REASSURING TO SEE YOU BEHAVING MORE

Request Line: Dude.

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER sits at the control panel, gazing into the booth with a thousand yard stare.  DJ 3000 is in his usual location against the wall.  The mood is very somber.  The lights on DJ 3000 start to flash with increasingly frequency, and then are joined

Request Line: Misters and Mistresses

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The studio sits empty.  The PRODUCER is nowhere to be seen.   DJ 3000: [sighs] DJ 3000: [to database] <?php $potential_topics = mysql_query("SELECT topic FROM request_line_database WHERE published = 'false'"); if (!$potential_topics) { echo 'Could not run query: ' . mysql_error(); exit; } $topic_array = best($potential_topics); echo $topic_array[0] ?> DJ 3000: NO, I KNOW HE'S SAVING THAT ONE FOR WHEN HE ACTUALLY HAS HIS SHIT TOGETHER ENOUGH TO INTRODUCE IT PROPERLY. DJ 3000:

Request Line: This Suit Burns Better – Look!

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER sits in front of his desktop computer, frowning.  He clicks the mouse, clicks it again, the waits for a second.  The screen flashes and he erupts into a litany of curses. DJ 3000: It was pretty obvious they had the queen. PRODUCER: Why were they even

Request Line: Speed

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY? OR MAYBE NIGHT? IT ALL SEEMS TO BE BLENDING TOGETHER WHEN YOU DON'T GO OUTSIDE ANYMORE. The PRODUCER is at the control panel, having an animated conversation with...someone inside the recording booth.  DJ 3000 looks on in concern, because the recording booth appears to be empty.  PRODUCER:

Request Line: Gardening

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER is on his knees in the office, wearing a torn "Jimmy and the Animal" promotional t-shirt as a headband.  He obviously has not bathed for quite some time.  He is inspecting the carpet carefully, apparently searching for something. There is a mesh bag of

Request Line: Loneliness

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER lies on his back on a couch in the office outside the sound booth. His left hand is draped over the edge of the couch, holding a stress ball. He throws the ball straight up in the air and catches it in front of

Request Line: Unauthorized Covers

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY The PRODUCER is stretched out on the studio couch, eyes glazed, staring at DJ 3000's display screen. DJ 3000: ARE YOU STILL WATCHING? PRODUCER: [blinks sleepily] Huh? Oh, right. Yeah, I'm still watching. DJ 3000: PREVIOUSLY, ON GREY'S ANATOMY... PRODUCER: You know what? Let's put a pin in it for

Request Line: Superstitions

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY DJ 3000 sits alone in the office, a single LED blinking lazily.  It is very quiet.  A flush is heard down the hallway.  A few moments later the PRODUCER enters, wearing a bathrobe.  A toothbrush is poking out of his mouth.  As DJ 3000 cycles out

Request Line: Pestilence

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - DAY A pair of radio professionals prepare for the day's show.  DJ 3000: [to himself] WELL, THAT'S KIND OF GRIM.  [to the PRODUCER] HEY YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT GOOGLE'S DOODLE TODAY. [calls it up on his main display] PRODUCER: Okay...[begins reading aloud]...And when he had opened the fourth seal, I

Request Line: Pass it On

In "honor" of the fact that coronavirus seems to be spreading throughout the world without any signs of abating, I thought we'd try something a little bit different (and unprecedented) here on Request Line today.  Here's how the game works.  I'm going to post a song with a number in