Vikings Team Preview: The Defense gets Addressed.

banner image via [intro Vikings team quarters] /Coach Kevin O'Connell addresses the entire team Coach O'Connell: "Holy geez guys! We're gonna have a super swell season this year!" Idiot QB: "Oh heck ya! It's gonna be super swell!" CO: "Oh heck ya. Super sweet!" IQB: "Super sweet!" CO: "Guys? I'm just gonna tell ya, I'm soo jazzed

Burdened with Glorious Purpose: 2023 Buffalo Bills Preview and Tuesday Open Thread

2022 PREDICTION: 9-8 2022 REALITY: 13-3! (No record for Cincy game, on account of Damar Hamlin temporarily dying) From last year's Preview:   There is nothing more depressing to a Bills fan than an expectation of success. We can't cope with it, because of our near-religious faith in The Narrative. The Narrative has taught us

Can’t We Just Hit “Simulate Season”?: 2023 Carolina Panthers Season Preview

2022 PREDICTION: Bad 2022 REALITY: Worse (but not bad enough) The Carolina Panthers. They have been in the league for nearly 30 years, and yet they have never shaken that Expansion Franchise stink despite playing in two Super Bowls- which I attribute to their insistence on teal-adjacent colors. They exist solely to

Can I Get an Amen!?!: 2022 Buffalo Bills Preview and Tuesday Open Thread

2021 PREDICTION: 13-4, AFC Champions 2021 REALITY: 11-6, Divisional Round loss in an instant classic It is dark times for the Buffalo Bills faithful. It's not just Eric from Lackawanna putting his injury settlement on the line picking them to go to the Super Bowl. It's everyone. The Bills are currently 7:2

#DisBelieveland: 2020 Cleveland Browns Bye Week Update

Quick: without looking at their record, are the Cleveland Browns a good team or a bad team?   Got an answer?   You're wrong.  Whichever way you answered, you're wrong.   Cleveland is a Limited Heisenberg Uncertainty Team: at any given time, you can know where they are, but you can't know where they are going.