Where we Discuss the Meaning of the Holiday.

yeah right

yeah right

yeah right is a lifelong Vikings fan.
And always wanted to be an astronaut.
And a cook.

So he’s cooking for astronauts now.

yeah right

Sometime in the middle of last week it was starting to look like I would be working Christmas Eve – I still did – and would be alone on Christmas Day. Eldest right is going to visit youngest right along with all my little uns on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in San Diego.

Believe me, I was fine with this. I was going to maybe throw a pot of beef stew on the stove, open up some frosty adult beverages and just chill the fuck out. I still have to go back to work on the 26th so the 25th is basically a random day off in the middle of the work week to me.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Having the holiday fall on a Tuesday this year almost certainly had some effect on this mindset.

As I began reflecting on this I was a little surprised at how unfazed I was by not really minding spending a day off relaxing and watching basketball and the idea of it being Christmas Day really didn’t enter my mind space at all.

Curious.

As mentioned before I am an unrepentant heathen and fiercely proud of it but Christmas really did mean something special when I was younger.

Just out of general curiosity I sent out a request to the team members in the top secret DFO clubhouse to ask them “What does this Holiday mean to you?” I kept it non-religious and was looking forward to their input to see if maybe it may enlighten me.

These are their responses.

BrettFavresColonoscopy: “Christmas means people asking me about Chinese food and a movie, even though my family never did that”

BallsofSteelandFury: “For us, Christmas means Christmas Eve dinner with bacalao and potatoes followed by the unwrapping of presents. Christmas Day is for sleeping in and watching TV. Maybe some porn if I’m feeling particularly festive and jolly.”

JJFozz: “My family celebrates Xmas Eve with homemade pasta, cream of crab soup, primed rib, and cookies. Then I sit there with my brother in law, drink, and make fun of the family we married into. Next day I watch thousands of dollars get unwrapped and broken within hours. Then we go to mom’s house, eat and drink, and wrap it up with visit to my wife’s crazy ass batshit idiot naive fuckface christian fundies for stupid shit. And it’s a dry house.”

Game Time Decision: “For me it’s totally cliche: I like spending the time with friends and family, even the ones I don’t like. And I love seeing the magic of the season through my kids eyes, whether it be Santa or the gifts or the surprises . We usually host Christmas dinner as both sets of parents are divorced, it was neutral ground and we then get dinner over in a few hours instead of days. And then cause I cooked a bird, I make turkey soup from the bones and eat nothing but soup and leftovers for a week.”

Senor Weaselo: “Christmas Eve is going to be a little bit different this year. We go to my grandparents’ (dad’s side) for dinner, but it’s going to be a more somber occasion than last holidays. My grandmother passed away in April, and my grandfather nearly followed her, though he is doing better now.
Christmas Day, Padre Weaselo plays Christmas at his church, we watch March of the Wooden Soldiers and the other Laurel and Hardy episodes on afterwards, and then we go to my aunt’s on my mom’s side for an Italian Christmas, and I need to remember where I put my Cards Against Humanity, because that’s also become a thing.”

[sorry for your loss Senor]

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers: “To me, Xmas is just another day, but it’s a day spent with the family. Xmas Eve with the Parental Commanders, where we typically just watch a movie. Then come back over the next morning, unwrap gifts, have to hear the Beach Boys Xmas album for the 29th time, and then pack up to go to my Grandparents about an hour away. Other family that I’m not really close with will be there too, and the food is pretty good. Grandma will get all the grown kids some really tacky dollar store toys to pad the present count, and as long as it’s done by a reasonable hour, I get to go home, have a whiskey and enjoy the rest of my vacation.”

Litre Cola: “Xmas eve we have “Orphans dinner” as none of us are from Calgary. The restaurant is closed so we use the kitchen, cook a huge meal and get absolutely black out. Xmas day is presents, Baileys and then white wine.”

Sharkbait: “Christmas means getting together with family for good food and drink, as cliche as that sounds. We always go over the top, with stuffed rigatoni on Christmas Eve, and either a Wellington, or a standing rib roast etc on Christmas day. I’m almost always in the kitchen prepping dinner. I enjoy watching everyone enjoy the food I’ve made for everyone.”

Shark Bait’s standing rib roast from last year

Scotchnaut: “Christmas these days means planning out a menu for at least 18 folks on my wife’s side. I like the kitchen and it keeps me away from the incessant gossiping regarding people I know or employ. [shudders] I stay completely sober (Booo!) during these get-togethers for fear of speaking my mind about the rampant hypocrisy that I witness. My side of the family is either dead, estranged or a business partner that has an agenda, so that’s a no-go. I wander off to my “Sanity Cave” as quickly as I can after supper. There are two other guys that feel the same way I do and they usually follow behind me after a time.”

Beerguyrob: “We went on vacation because neither of us needed any family drama this year. Relatives are sad, but I stand by the decision.”

SonofSpam: My thoughts (and they’re genuine, due to beer): I bitch and moan about the endless shopping, the commercialization, the commitments that I don’t wanna commit to, basically anything I can bitch about. But Christmas forces me to acknowledge that my family and friends are the greatest gifts in my life, and that it’s important to recognize what really matters. Little things like a shared meal, or big things like the smile from someone (human or canine) who got a really cool gift – it’s all I need to get through the next eleven months. The holiday itself is whatever you make it; heck, Jesus was probably actually born in March. But the connections (in person and, yes, online) are the best part of Christmas, and however Grinchy the exterior, deep down I love this time of year. Don’t tell anybody.

ReverendMayhem: “Neither is it ham, nor pomp. Nay, the true meaning of Christmas is drinking. Drinking and revenge.” Preferably accompanied by a picture of Alvis.

The Maestro: “I unironically love Christmas. Everything about it. The music, the decorating, the food, the gifts… all of it. If that makes me sappy as hell, then so be it. Even into now, December means that it’s an incredibly exciting time of year… my mother still decorates hardcore for Christmas, even with the children all grown up. My parents’ house goes from organized, tidy and uncluttered 11 months of the year to absolutely bursting at the seams with Santa Claus statues (which are all handmade and not tacky, mercifully), pine boughs, freshly-picked holly, and every other possible decoration during the Christmas season. Traditions are important, but we’ve also tried to keep them simple and manageable over the years instead of getting ridiculously worked up over things. My mom always cooks the turkey and other things the day before so as to not have to slave in the kitchen all day on the day of; we always have eggs Benedict and mimosas for breakfast, fresh panini sammiches for lunch, and then turkey dinner around 6:30 or so. It’s always the same people for dinner – my parents, my sister, and I, and starting about 13 years ago we’ve had family friends join us for turkey every year as well, including their 95-year-old grandmother, which is cool. Most of all, though, I feel like Christmas, to me, is how we’ve managed to harken back to traditions of the past – both our own societal ones as well as those from our family – while also still managing to keep things fresh and subtly adapting stuff as time goes on. Lady Maestro is now always part of my family Christmas, since her own family is so far-flung, and she’s slid right into the festivities without a hitch at all, which I think is awesome. We’ve gotten her a matching stocking to join all of ours, and she’s been instrumental in expanding our board game and puzzle library, which are also projects constantly ongoing in my parents’ house over the holidays. The best part of everything, though, is that because we’ve all consciously made an effort to try and not stress about things, even with all of the long-running traditions we have going on, is that the day itself doesn’t end up feeling stressful, with the burden of having to jump around from house to house and worry about seeing everyone in multiple families in the process. I absolutely would never begrudge anyone else who has to do that – but I’m certainly grateful for how we’ve chosen to undertake things. In the next few years, when I’ll possibly have my own kids to consider, I’m sure we’ll find routines and traditions changing again, but overall, I know that one way or another, we’ll be doing our damndest to try and strike the best possible balance of upholding holiday traditions while also getting the chance to relax and just revel in the moment with everyone we care about most.”

A lovely diatribe indeed.

After starting this post and soliciting the responses of my fellow reprobates an interesting development or two took place. First thing that happened all 3 of my older brothers, who initially appeared to all be busy, took Christmas Day off. This Christmas all of the right brothers will be spending the entire day together. Dinner will include ham, scalloped potatoes and my own version of Thai style green beans…
That you may remember from this post.

 

 

 

 

yeah right
yeah right
yeah right is a lifelong Vikings fan. And always wanted to be an astronaut. And a cook. So he's cooking for astronauts now.
Please Login to comment
24 Comment threads
31 Thread replies
10 Followers
 
Most reacted comment
Hottest comment thread
22 Comment authors
SonOfSpamballsofsteelandfuryViva La Tabula RazaRikki-Tikki-DeadlyBrick Meathook Recent comment authors
  Subscribe  
Notify of
Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Even though I am an atheist and Christ is not my saviour, I usually travel up to the ancestral homeland next town over from Foxboro this time of year and spend the holidays with my cousins and their kids (cousins of mine too, if I understand genealogy correctly) because I always have use-or-lose leave on the books and the bar that I habituate here in SoTex is closed up for around ten days so the owner can take a Caribbean cruise.
This year I elected to have gastric bypass in mid-December so I could convalesce through the second week of January. So, no homeland sojourn and I’ll continue to live vicariously through y’all’s food and drink narratives for now while I hew to my non-alcoholic, extremely limited diet over the holidays. Not even visiting local friends, because I can’t drink or consume any of the foods that are usually on offer.
Me and President Trump, all alone on Christmas, boo fucking hoo. It was my choice, and it was his choice too. Haven’t had the gonads yet to visit the website to see what that anthropomorphic, animated colostomy bag’s market crash has done to my 401K. But I do have my dogs keeping me company at least. Between the car shows on NBCSN and Motor Trend and following along with y’all, I’ll have me a time. They didn’t say anything about no weed, after all. And I’ve lost over 25 pounds since the surgery two weeks ago.

ballsofsteelandfury

Glad the operation went well! Stay healthy and keep us posted on your progress!

SonOfSpam

Congrats on getting thru that, no joke. Also, unlike Trump, colostomy bags have a use, so I’m not a fan of that comparison.

But for realz, glad you are losing weight and gittin healthy. Gonna do the same MAYBE after the 1st.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I apologize for my absence – I am writing this from the toilet during one of my all-too-infrequent breaks from family. Anyhow, Christmas seems to be becoming about wearing out pajamas out and seeing the first movie of the day at the mall in Glendale, then loafing around the house (sober for now) and eating the leftovers from the big dinner we made two nights ago.

Merry Christmas, everybody. You folks are wonderful.

rockingdog
rockingdog

found a funny:
comment image

Senor Weaselo

I have opened up my Last Dab Reduxx. For family. We’re not dead yet. So that’s nice.

ArmedandHammered
ArmedandHammered

Merry Christmas all! I hope you are enjoying yours day as much as we have enjoyed ours. Very relaxing as the wife and I went nowhere, only phone and text contact with family, and it is now time for Ropa Vieja and tamales

ballsofsteelandfury

Ropa Vieja is the BEST!!

Col. Duke LaCross
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers
Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

Just made it to the grandparents. Not sure if it’s my Mom’s driving, being in the back seat or a combo, but that hour always leaves me with a splitting headache. I need a fucking beer.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!
Buddy Cole's Halftime Show!

Merry Christmas! And if you’re Jewish, happy guilt-laden Tuesday!

King Hippo

Buddy always gets the phrasing just right!

I decided to skip my sister’s, even though the kids are going. Raising mah recluse game, yo.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Alright, Vice is about to start. Will report back on Christian Bale.

scotchnaut

Which vice does he have?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

For this role? Gluttony.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Vice Is one of the few movies I want to see. Adam McKay is becoming a really great filmmaker. This is the same guy who made The Big Short and also Step Brothers and The Other Guys.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No thanks. Fuck Dick Cheney, may he rot in hell, and the story of his rise to power – however accurately it might be portrayed – can go fuck itself because the only time I ever want to think about that man again is when I am drinking a bottle of champagne in celebration of his death.

SonOfSpam

What he said, this guy.

No interest, despite what I’m sure are great performances.

scotchnaut

The fella I envy the most is litre cola because I did the very same thing when I worked bar in Ottawa. There was a rundown dive place that opened on Christmas day for resto staff only and we could indulge all our vices. Hash knives in the kitchen, pot in the guy’s washroom and the table at the rear of the place was Coke Central. Seeing as we were all wait staff, things never went off the rails and everyone had a great time. And you spent it with buddies rather than family.

/just a really great time
//anyone know of The Lafeyette Hotel?

litre_cola

We have done it every year for the last 10 at whatever restaurant the manager is at. (She is my best friend) We had about 20 people last night had ham, turkey, a goose with all sorts of sides. Played Beer Pong, flip cup and other childish drinking games. it was superb as always.

ballsofsteelandfury

I don’t know about you, but i’m ready for summer…

ballsofsteelandfury

Awww…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m with Lady BFC’s family this Christmas which means two things: guilt trip phone calls from my mom and actually living the aforementioned Chinese food and a movie stereotype.

blaxabbath

Sounds delicious. Our Chinese food spot closed up earlier this year and we haven’t really had any sense. I’d love some of that pork (the oddly pink/red stuff) and chow mein.

litre_cola

Go to a Chinese movie to mix it up!

blaxabbath

comment image

blaxabbath

Had two good sized fires rocking in my fire pit and chimnea last night. The plan was to push everyone outside while I cooked. Didn’t work but they looked good. Found out this morning that we’re in a no burn — yeah, sorry our factories and cars and unrestrained development have fucked up the air quality so bad that you can’t enjoy a backyard fire during your one fucking Christmas per year.

Point is, I got a rager going in the chiminea now. Ain’t like I’m gonna spend my retirement years in this place anyways (sorry Litre).

litre_cola

When I get the house in old person land, I will be selling it immediately and moving near water in the winters.

The Maestro

Merry Christmas, all. Eggs Benny for breaky, gift unwrapping, and then freshly pressed paninis for lunch. Time for a nap before we get to drankin’ and turkeyin’. All the best to you and yours.

Wakezilla

Merry Christmas ya filthy animals

theeWeeBabySeamus

theeWeeBabySeamus

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s a dumb place to keep bowls.

King Hippo

I’m not a good guy, but I like the idea of being a good guy:

Game Time Decision

Went to my wife’s aunts house for a Christmas Eve thing last night and the aunt served Wendy’s Cheese burgers and baked potatoes as the meal, a couple of burgers and a potato each. With some home made desserts after the meal. While a non-traditional meal, I’m still trying to decide if it’s genius or not.

litre_cola

Yeah, I don’t know whether I would think that was cheap or fucking brilliant. If they added Frosty’s then it would be genius.

Anyone else consider Wendy’s a step up from McD’s?

Game Time Decision

Still not that cheap. She’s said it was about $130 for the 15 of us, so less work, more time. And she got all the condiments on the side so everyone could dress up their food however they liked.
And Wendy’s > McD.

King Hippo

oh yeah, deffo

blaxabbath

I had not been to Wendy’s in probably 20 years — effectively never — until about six months ago. Drove through and got the juicest, most flavorful, well-dressed fast food burger I’ve ever had. Better than many shitty Applebee’s-level diner burgers I’ve tried.

And the fries were legit, if no McD’s.

Senor Weaselo

Steamed hams for Christmas? Bold strategy, Cotton.

ballsofsteelandfury

Awww, those are nice stories! I wish everyone in DFO land a great day with minimal drama!

Redshirt

Today we celebrate the day 2,018 years ago where either a Savior was born who conquered death and defeated sin so we all could go to Heaven when we die, or the culmination of an elaborate lie created by an unfaithful wife who didn’t want her husband to know she cheated on him.

Senor Weaselo

It can be two things!

King Hippo

this is just lovely

litre_cola

I used this to send to my friends. Word for word. Great job Redshirt.

King Hippo

well, hopefully you added a “u” to Saviour

litre_cola

You know I did!

Wakezilla

I heard from a religious scholars the most likely thing that happened is that Mary was raped by a Roman soldier

blaxabbath

Jesus was white!!!!

Top