Your “It’s Never Gonna End, Will It?!” Sunday Evening Open Thread

For some people, the work never stops. For others, the work never stops trying to protect the brand.

Late Friday, Trump sent out cease-and-desist letters to the three largest fundraising entities for the Republican Party — the RNC, NRCC and NRSC — for using his name and likeness on fundraising emails and merchandise. You know – the people who slavishly supported him through the lunacy & idiocy of the last four years. But when asked about biting the hand that raised his profile, a Trump advisor remarked, “President Trump remains committed to the Republican Party and electing America First conservatives, but that doesn’t give anyone – friend or foe – permission to use his likeness without explicit approval.” It apparently comes down to:

a) He’s not getting a cut; and

b) He doesn’t want any money raised using his name to go towards people who supported his impeachment.

Along those lines, in answering a follow-up question, it was noted by a Trump spokesperson that “there’s only one way to donate to Trump Republicans: through his own Save America PAC.” When reached for clarification, former President Trump issued a terse statement that he was “just protecting the brand. You gotta protect the brand,” and that he had “too much to count right now; I don’t got enough hands.”


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • NY Rangers vs Pittsburgh – 7:30pm | NBCSN / Sportsnet1
  • NBA:
    • NBA Skills Challenge/3-Point Contest – 6:30pm | TNT/TBS / TSN3 / Sportsnet
    • NBA Allstar Game: Team LeBron at Team Kevin – 8:00pm | TNT/TBS / TSN3 / Sportsnet
  • NCAA:
    • Oregon at Oregon St. – 8:00pm | FS1
    • Women’s PAC 12 Tournament Final – 8:00pm | TSN2
  • Curling:
    • 2021 Tim Hortons Brier: Pool Play – 8:30pm | TSN

Don’t drink too much – the workweek starts tomorrow.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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ballsofsteelandfury

Best commercial of the year?

Scoop There It Is!

Hands down.

Redshirt
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Real men are watching Oprah’s interview of Meghan Markle.

litre_cola

Did Oprah ask about Fulham v Liverpool? She really should have.

litre_cola

I thought Oprah was wicken. My bad.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I found an unlabeled beer amongst my monkish. Here goes nothing.

Redshirt

Bengals new uniforms may have been leaked. I’m reserving my comments until the official release in case they are wrong or if I can use my lost job as a sacrifice upon the altar of the Football Gods to undo this abomination that has forever ruined my eyes, but just in case these are them, here’s a sneak preview:

The Price is Right Losing Horn – Gaming Sound Effect (HD) – YouTube

Gumbygirl

There’s not much you can do to make orange look good. At least they aren’t smegma colored, like the Rambominations.

Redshirt

They turned the jerseys down too much. It like they took the cheap shirts and threw on stripes.

Joe Burrow Cincinnati Bengals Nike Name & Number T-Shirt – Orange (fanatics.com)

Its the NFL jersey equivalent of when Don Mattingly trimmed his sideburns for Mr. Burns.

The Simpsons – Don Mattingly Sideburns – YouTube

I like the Paul Brown signature, but why put it on the inside of the collars? That’s a way to honor your team’s founder and one of the greatest minds in Pro Football: neck sweat.

Plus, when you’re dealing with two dark colors like like Black (0,0,0) and Orange (255,165,0), its important to throw in and outline so the colors won’t blend into each other, and this is coming from a guy who got a C+ in art.

Finally, if they messed with the stripes on the helmets, then we’re gonna have a “traveling team” next year because Paul Brown Stadium will burn to the ground. We will make the MAGA-invasion of the US Capital look like a middle school tour group.

However, if they use a white striped helmet for the away uniforms, I resend everything I said and will fully supports these cheap-ass-shit uniforms.

litre_cola

Hell yeah, take em where you can get em.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m93Fpb1jV1o

Col. Duke LaCross

Well, you’d think this ought to be about all she wrote for Woody Allen’s career.

Last edited 3 years ago by Col. Duke LaCross
ballsofsteelandfury

You could have said that decades ago yet here we are.

ballsofsteelandfury

Someone please explain to me why Woody Allen is as celebrated as he is/was. I’ve never understood the appeal.

Dunstan

I think a lot of neurotic unattractive men of a certain generation decided that the notion that they are actually irresistible to women like Diane Keaton (or Mira Sorvino, etc.) was brilliantly insightful.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Or Tiffany Amber Thiessen.

clint greasewood

I think New York film geeks like their own guy and since New York is the center of the universe he is part of the culture. Just checked is filmography and he has been putting out a movie every year since 1969.

litre_cola

Yep, no idea why. Had an ex that worshipped him. No clue.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Match Point was good. Midnight in Paris was…okay, I guess. I have not been terribly impressed with anything else of his I’ve seen. What’s Up Tiger Lily was at least groundbreaking.

Gumbygirl

I don’t get it. He wouldn’t last 5 minutes with me, I’d give him something to whine and kvetch about!

Dunstan

“Oh, four minutes, tops, and only if I thought about baseball the whole time.”

I’ll accept my Oscar for screenwriting now, thanks.

Gumbygirl

Lol, my phrasing was a bit questionable! I wouldn’t make it to sexy time with him, he’d be bleeding on the floor before 5 minutes of conversation was over, and 4 1/2 minutes of that would be me telling him to fuck off before I drop your annoying ass!

Don T

1. Woody Allen created the fake documentary (“Take the Money and Run”), before Spinal Tap, The Office, etc.

2. Annie Hall has been ripped off
So
Many
Times (most notably by When Harry Met Sally). It is still insanely creative.

3. If absurdist humor is your thang, Woody Allen is your god. Makes Monty Python look like a bunch of overeducated amateurs jacking off.

Now, lemme see what all the fuss is abou—oh my God. Mental note: stick to the work, never defend the man.

rockingdog

found a funny:

Every scene on Twin Peaks is just Harry being like “Coop, who uhhh killed Laura Palmer?” and then Cooper being like “Harry, have you ever played any of the Metal Gear games?”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m experimenting with making a “St. Bernard” cocktail tonight. Ingredients are ginger/brown sugar syrup, lemon, brandy, and hot water. I need to dial in the proportions but otherwise it’s going very well.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m looking on the web for other versions, and there’s this, which enrages me:

http://middlebar.blogspot.com/2011/08/st-bernard.html

A vodka-based drink, and…

> I recommend using the fresh juice of ruby red grapefruit and this drink is the most flavorful in the summer. 



Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Most flavorful in the summer? What the fuck? No brandy? Does this guy have any idea what a St. Bernard dog is known for?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

> The collective name for a large group of Saint Bernards is a “floof”

Why yes, I will be drinking a floof of St Bernards this evening…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

These two ounces of brandy I’ve had so hard have hit me so hard they might as well have been eight.

herodotus450

Is “Mango Addiction” in the newest DSM? And do you think papaya is a suitable methodone? Asking foar a friend.

clint greasewood

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Last edited 3 years ago by clint greasewood
clint greasewood

Have been seeing this chinless man child, the governor of Mississippi Tate Reeves, and though no way this man could be real.

ArmedandHammered

Wait, that cretin is old enough to be elected to public office? I have yet to be conceived grandkids (I hope) that look older than him.

Gumbygirl

Southern Fratboy. They all start to look like that in their early 30’s, and it just gets worse.

litre_cola

Oh your last note is far too late!

LemonJello

Welp, time for me to leave the clubhouse.

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Later, Taters!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Horatio Cornblower

I’ve decided to take over as the new Dr. Seuss, creating a series of books that will use easy rhyming patterns to teach young kids to read. My first book will be called “Bigger & Bigger”

Anyone wanna help me out with some rhymes?

herodotus450

I’ve got a lot of rhymes for “bagger,” but not bigger, sorry.

Game Time Decision

-Jeremy Clarkson
/allegedly

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[raises hand] – Lee Atwater

Horatio Cornblower

Is Limbaugh holding his other hand?

Because they’re both dead and in Hell, get it?

SonOfSpam

Atwater repented, but my Catholic upbringing says that ain’t good enough. Burnt to a crisp, just like he will be again tomorrow.

Horatio Cornblower

I was also raised Catholic, and that death-bed repentance thing never rang true to me. I figure God’s gonna be up there with a clipboard and an abacus going “Nice try, asshole, the exit’s that way” as a portal to Hell opens up beneath Rush Limbaugh’s feet.

LemonJello

Actual “sorting” process in Heaven, artist’s concept:

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Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
Gumbygirl

Yup to this

SonOfSpam

Hey Dad, why isn’t my wee-wee more bigger?
Well son, it would be if you were a digger.
Dig wells and trenches, your muscles are bigger
And soon you’ll be bangin the ho’s like a natural.

(1st paragraph is free. Contact my attorney for more pages)

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

> Contact my attorney for more pages

“Yeah, we’re not falling for that again.” – George R.R. Martin’s publisher

Horatio Cornblower

Friend gave me one of these.
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Good lord it’s good.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I feel like the first lines of this song are tangentially appropriate. A friend indeed.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DHQngnnHE_0

Don T

That’s worth some skunk weed and a butt of Camel Lights in the clink.
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herodotus450

Isn’t Tom Cotton a rabbit that gets in trouble for bopping field mice on the head? What’s he doing talkin’ politics?

Gumbygirl

Little Bunny Foofoo, but he’s every bit as stupid.
I wish the Good Fairy would come down and bop him on his head.

SonOfSpam

Spent 30 seconds investigating this, and it turns out this is actually accurate.

What Cotton neglects to say (accidentally, I’m sure) is that prisoners received stimulus money on the last two bills as well, both of which Cotton voted for.

bk109

… wait, are you suggesting that a politician neglected to give the full context on a fact he’s throwing around, because it hurts his point? I’m shocked, I tellz ya, Shocked!

Dunstan

In a related story, Cotton declared that the Clean Air and Water Act was a mistake because it turns out prisoners are allowed to breathe air and drink water, too.

SonOfSpam

I think Zion’s missed 3 dunks so far. FUN!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Unacceptable.” – Andy Reid, holding fourteen chicken nuggets in one hand

Sharkbait

I fucking hated The Never Ending Story.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I found the concept of the “luck dragon” to be extremely irritating. IT’S A FLYING DOG! NOT A DRAGON!

SonOfSpam

First read that as “fuck dragon” and that might’ve made for a different better filmgoing experience.

LemonJello

[DOOR FLIES OPEN]

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“Fuck Dragon is just one of my aliases.”

Col. Duke LaCross

Unleash!

Gumbygirl

It is deffo a doggo!

Gumbygirl

The Neverending Storeeeeee, eee, eee?eee, eee, eee,eee?!!! I must have seen that a thousand times when my son was little.

SonOfSpam

Did you see Stranger Things? Because that song played a key part.

Gumbygirl

No, I heard it was good and weird.

SonOfSpam

Agree with that assessment. First thing we watched when we finally got Netflix last year.

Gumbygirl

I got signed up for Netflix without my permission when I switched wireless companies. It took lots of T and A (threats and accusations, you pervs) to get rid of it and get my money back. I have a very bad attitude about it, so I will never see anything that is on it.

Sharkbait

Me, putting the Rangers Penguins game on with 3 minutes left in the first:

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Last edited 3 years ago by Sharkbait
Gumbygirl

So the Pens are winning? Yayyy!

Sharkbait

Three goals in 1:01 will do that.

Gumbygirl

If I watch them, they instantly turn to shit, so I will wait until it’s over and check out the highlights.

Sharkbait

No no. You should absolutely turn it on. It’ll be great. Trust me

Gumbygirl

I’m not falling for that, mister! But here is a consolation prize

facebook_1615146158947_6774413995057035236_80020640209161.jpg
Sharkbait

A for effort at least.

ballsofsteelandfury

Ha ha!

Don T

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

How early is too early to eat dinner?

Don T

Did you get your AARP card? It comes with a schedule bib.

SonOfSpam

The local Polly’s Pies has a nice roast beef special from 3-4:30.

Don T

But that’s nap time!

SonOfSpam

A true siesta goes from after lunch until pre-dinner drinks. If that means you gotta lunch at 10 AM, so be it.

Don T

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t know if this is a joke or not because I’d push my own mother into the street if she was standing in the way of me eating roast beef and then pie at a discount.

Okay, not my own mother. I’d feel no remorse about doing it to yours, though.

bk109

It’s never too late nor too early… it’s always just the right time (tho I may be biased in the sense that I’ve worked some really fucked up shift systems over the years to learn that time’s but a societal construct) 😛

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The trick is to eat two dinners, that way you can justify having the first one at 5 p.m. or so.

LemonJello

Stares in confused Andy Reid at RTD

SonOfSpam

Would’ve been courteous. I’m sure he at least considered it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m mildly interested in it because I expect it took place in Montecito and was just a stone’s throw (Josh Allen edition) from the house my wife’s cousin owns that we have stayed in a few times.

Horatio Cornblower

According to Twitter there was concern expressed as to how dark their child’s skin tone might be. As though that pasty-ass gene pool couldn’t use some extra melanin in it as things stand now.

SonOfSpam

I guess Steph Curry is still a good basketball shooting guy.

SonOfSpam

Definitely. They need a reason to care even more than we do.

ballsofsteelandfury

I just found out that Atlante is back in Mexico City. All is good with the world.

Game Time Decision

I’m assuming whoever picked Judy Jetson in the draft a few weeks ago is Astro in the GIF above

Viva La Tabula Raza

Hanna-Barbera couldn’t get away with showing Astro humping Judy’s leg back in those days.

Dunstan

Fair.

Viva La Tabula Raza

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bk109

I never understood ^ this to be honest, why would you do this when you can use this sort of money to buy yourself a country to your liking, become a benevolent dictator for life.. or someone who makes everyone quake in fear just at the thought of you … uh, I mean, how can you swim in coins.. Yes, no megalomaniacal ideas here, nope, no-sir-ee… No thoughts on how many nukes can you buy on the black market for the sunny Caribbean People’s Republic of Myselfia, nor how many insta-models (whatever the hell that means?) could I get… Nope, just mechanics of swimming in coins and stacks of cash… pantsless

Viva La Tabula Raza

I think it’s supposed to be allegorical, not literal. 😉

Also, how did Kelly and his Heroes actually dispose of all that gold?

And there’s no way Michael Caine and those Minis could have hauled that much gold and really got away, even if they had 1,000 HP Chevy LS motors.

You just can’t mix gold and reality in any kind of heist film or story without suspending your sense of disbelief.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
bk109

Tell that to people that actually tried to calculate how much money could fit in that vault (I’m serious :D) … lowest estimate puts it at “More than enough to be a brutal despot using his loving subjects as playthings… and still get invited for tea and crumpets by Lizzie DaSecond” levels 😀
Edit: As for the other points (that got editted in later)
Same way as the Nazis – Switzerland
Haven’t seen the original … and people that have seen it have told me not to mention the remake under a threat of keel-hauling
Of course, that’s why it’s hard to make a heist movie, because you’ve got to find the right balance of glitz, glamour an’ .. 😉 Basically, it’s the same as a good whodunit – you have to do things smartly enough to feel fun and at least semi-plausible and without overusing plot contrivances … all the while ensuring things aren’t too boring and without reducing the opponents to little more than developmentally challenged vegetables (aka – Don’t make a “Knives out”, because “brain trauma/affordable weed/both goes only that far” )

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Viva La Tabula Raza

If I had a gold windfall, shit would end up for me like in A Simple Plan.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Simple_Plan_(film)

bk109

If I had a windfall like that, I’d honestly just call the authorities, because I’d assume that the money is marked or fake. … or a cartel’s… Basically, I’ll apply the same basic rule I’ve taught my kids about gun safety (you stay clear enough of any unattended firearm, because “unloaded guns shoot the loudest”) an’ keep my distance 😀

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I read that book in high school and it irritated me very, very much.

Game Time Decision

At DFO, we have a no pants rule….so kinda have swim in gold like that.

Viva La Tabula Raza

At least the gold is not molten.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I thought Family Guy’s take on that was…solid.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xLJrzfWTu9E