Editors note: during each season of Sunday Gravy the author will “stash” or pre-write an episode or two since events happen, shit gets in the way and life intervenes. This is one of those episodes. Obviously with its upbeat or Pollyannaish nature it was written just prior to the events we are dealing with currently. After considering an edit/update the author decided to leave it in its current state. Besides who couldn’t use something upbeat or a slice of pie?

Hey everybody!

Yep, it’s really me. I haven’t been kidnapped and replaced with a Sunday Gravy wannabe.

This really is an episode of Sunday Gravy and we really are going to make dessert.

Pie in fact!

For those of you who are long time DFO-ers you may remember way back in the early, early days of [Door Flies Open] we actually did have a Sunday Gravy post with the theme being pie. One quick difference though, it was from Old School Zero and not from your humble narrator. He filled in for me for an episode. It was actually kind of a pain in the ass tracking that linked post down but it was worth finding.

This was from all the way back in 2016.

Gosh, we were all so young, innocent and barely jaded then. I wonder what happened between summer of 2016 and today that turned everything so fucked up and surreal.

Hmm.

Back in my married days – in a previous lifetime – I used to make desserts all the damn time. Being a father of 2 will kind of dictate that shit. I made pies, cookies, brownies all the usual high caloric shit plus I made a loaf of bread weekly. Hell I had my own sourdough starter that I kept for years.

The ex wife got custody of the sourdough starter.

Back then it was OK to make these things because there were 4 of us eating on it. Once I moved out on my own it didn’t make a lot of sense to bake a pie because that would mean my fat ass would be the only one consuming it.

Which I still did anyway.

Lifestyle changes and dietary changes intervened, I lost over 100 pounds and basically stopped the dessert baking.

Twenty years have passed.

I still don’t fuck around much with dessert. I’ve kind of lost my sweet tooth but if I’m eating out somewhere and I see key lime pie on the menu?

Fuck yes I want a taste of that.

Key lime and lemon meringue pie are my two jams.

Technically this isn’t “key” lime pie since it doesn’t use “key” lime juice, it’s just plain old lime juice from a little plastic squeeze bottle but this motherfucker is delicious.

We gon get after this bastard!

There’s a reason why the expression “easy as pie” exists. This shit is entry fucking level easy.

Let’s go ahead and take a look at the assembly of this very tasty concoction.

First we’re going to make a graham cracker/macadamia crust! Shit yes, we are.

If any of you astute readers remember this photo from a couple of weeks ago when we made loco moco…

See back there in the upper right?

That’s a box of graham crackers. You’re an observant motherfucker. If any of you wondered why we had a box of graham crackers in a photo with the ingredients for mac salad, well? That’s the reason.

Graham cracker/macadamia nut crust!

Massive props and inspiration today from SallysBakingAddiction.com

You will need:

8 full sheets of graham crackers

1/2 cup of macadamia nuts – I used dry roasted and salted

1 tablespoon of sugar

5 tablespoons of butter.

Break out your old trusty food processor and dump in the crackers and the nuts. Pulse until crumbly. It’s OK if the nuts are still slightly chunky. In fact it will kind of enhance the crust a bit more.

There you go. Now dump this mixture into a bowl, add the sugar and butter and stir until everything is combined.

MMM, buttery, nutty cookie goodness! Don’t lick your fingers you damn heathen! There’s a virus out there!

Then we take our crust makings and get them in a pie plate. Spend a little time to do this right. We want even layers and be sure to spread the mixture all the way up the sides of the plate.

Goddamn lovely it is!

Think the crust was easy? Wait until you try the filling.

That’s it!

That would be the following:

Pie filling.

2 (14 ounce) cans full-fat sweetened condensed milk

1 cup of key lime juice or just regular lime juice in the squeezy bottle if you can’t get key lime juice

4 large egg yolks

1 lime for zesting as a garnish.

Now we’ve got to separate some eggs.

Y’all have done this right? Crack the egg carefully toss the ingredients between the 2 shell halves while the slimy ass egg white goes dribbling out of the bottom? It’s pretty simple if the egg was properly cracked.

One VERY important cooking tip to file away in your memory. It’s OK to have a little egg white in your yolks. It is NOT OK to have egg yolks in your egg whites.

You’re welcome.

Now all we’ve got to do is marry these things together.

Like so.

I just used a whisk for a minute of so until the filling was smooth and evenly mixed.

Filling goes into the shell.

See? This shit ain’t rocket science. And believe me I know the difference between the two!

Now she’s about ready for the oven.

Here’s a more artistic angle for the pre-cooked pie.

Now let’s get ‘er in the garage! Into a preheated 350 degree oven for about 15-20 minutes.

This pie was also made on a day when both of my kiddos were visiting along with the grand chilluns so we had lots of photographic assistance, thus making life easier on my old ass.

This baby is cooked!

Fucking beautiful already right? Let’s go ahead and pretty her up a bit more.

Let’s get some lime zest on there.

Another interpretation of the same shot.

Got to make some whipped cream now.

Whipped Cream.

1 cup heavy cream

2 Tablespoons sugar, you can use powdered sugar if you would like.

1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

I remember growing up my mom made her whipped cream with a hand mixer.

How quaint.

Let’s break out the motherfucking beast for this baby.

That’s the whip attachment for the Kitchenaid. Add everything into the bowl and beat on a medium speed for 4-5 minutes. We need to get it fluffy.

That’s what the bakers would call “stiff peaks” or when the whipped cream retains its’ shape when you stand it up.

Next? Prepare the piping apparatus!

That’s a one gallon freezer bag with a corner cut off. Fill the bag with the whipped cream first THEN cut the corner of the bag off. It will be a shitload easier that way.

Now get to piping!

Eldest right was on artistic duty for the pie and she did an incredibly decorative presentation of the whipped cream dollops. Just a bit more lime zest over everything.

And there we are!

Holy shit! That’s a nice shot.

Here it is in portrait mode!

How about a taste?

Oh my!

You already know what we’ve got working here don’t you? It’s sweet, it’s tart and tangy. The interplay between the sweetness of the pie and the salty nutty crunch from the macadamia crust is the difference maker here. God DAMN does that work well together.

If you’ve never made a crust using a cookie/nut combo thing give it a go for sure. I’ve also made a vanilla wafer/slivered almond crust previously that’s also fucking incredibly tasty.

I actually ordered 2 16 oz bottles of real key lime juice after making this pie on the off chance that, you know, maybe we want to fuck around with it again.

While I am still my savory/carnivorous usual self, every once in a blue moon you just need a goddamn bite of pie.

Life is short.

Our future is uncertain.

We can at least enjoy the moments we have.

Much love to you all.

Be well. Eat well. Treat others with respect.

And when in doubt?

PEACE!