2020 Quotables – Week 6 (Submissions)

blaxabbath
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Look, am I having a Joe Flacco year here at Quotables? Yes. But, unlike Adam Gase, am I doing anything about it? Yes.

Tune in Friday to find out the Fresh New Taektm on Quotables!

Submissions are below.


Ice Cold “Any GM Negotiating with Bill O’Brien” Celebration

We need a five game preseason.

Final Score: Packers 10 – Buccaneers 38.

A surprisingly diverse display of fan reactions here.

It’s even more embarrassing against the Jaguars…

I guess a noncontact fumble would count as a football move….

It’s gonna be alright, dogg, you still got AOC.

Just an evergreen #PITvsCLE gif.
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blaxabbath
blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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[…] 2020 Quotables – Week 6 (Submissions) – October 20, 2020 […]

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Look, you can’t NOT cover things in gravy around here
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Never mow another man’s lawn!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Bowling bowling bowling
The Cowboys’ asses are swollen
Keep them Cardinals bowling
Rawhide

Last edited 1 month ago by BrettFavresColonoscopy
Redshirt

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Year 2020 is starting to glitch reality.

Redshirt

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Pity Sex is the best sex!

Redshirt

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Hey, whatayaknow? Stickum does have an Expiration Date!

Redshirt

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Fun isn’t something I think of when watching the Steelers destroy a quarterback. But this… does put a smile on my face

ballsofsteelandfury

It certainly put a boner in my pants!

[…] another fantastic buffet of topics to discuss. So your mission for tonight is to go participate in the Quotables post, get through tonight whilst commenting with your [DFO] comrades, and the bounty of tomorrow […]

Game Time Decision

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I haven’t seen a strike that good that since ol’ JJ found oil

Don T

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When we get home [kiss] I’ll give you [kiss] my [pecks earlobe] crying pillow

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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No more Danica?
No more Olivia?
No more Captain Bluebunny?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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CUCK LIONS FEVER, CATCH IT

Game Time Decision

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Eagles have been vaccinated against catching anything

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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I won’t even suck your cock for $1000

TheRevanchist

I bet his wife was watching the game at home.

Game Time Decision

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“Cute kid, blax”
-lady whispering into blax’s ear.

Beerguyrob

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“It was after seeing how far the Sound Machine’s skills had fallen that Gloria Estefan decided to cancel the reunion tour.”

Game Time Decision

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When did Rivers get traded to Miami?

Beerguyrob

I like how the older one is trying to stifle his brother’s emerging sexuality.

“If dad sees this, it’s back in the closet for you.”

Last edited 1 month ago by Beerguyrob
Game Time Decision

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Two with the pink hitting the one that stinks

SonOfSpam

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“One thing we’ve done is bring in a special group and seal them in a suite during the game. We call them ‘the fourteens’ and they roam the stadium after the game and clean up the discarded food and whatnot. They’re feral kids, abandoned in the Everglades, probably after exhausting their families during a crappy Disney World trip. It’s a win-win, since they’ll eventually become workers in our telemarketing department.”

Beerguyrob

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“So, your Cowboys lost. Remember the bet – tonight I get to be Jerry; you get to be the hooker.”

nomonkeyfun

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“Harf, Harf. I always use force when people don’t do what I want.”

-B. Roethlisberger

King Hippo

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No, really honey. The small ones are so cute!

nomonkeyfun

I don’t think he wants to hear about her love for Horatio.

King Hippo

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That’s FOAR you guys calling our racist backup QB a racist!

LemonJello

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That’s just disrespectful; being good at two sports when the Cowboys aren’t even good at one…

monty this seems strange to me

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“Don’t wait up for me tonight honey, I’m going home with some Arizona guys I just met.”

Duchess

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If it makes you feel any better even if Dak was still a live the score would have been the same.

LemonJello

“Tonight, wear the Dalton jersey while I peg you.”

monty this seems strange to me

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“Dude, settle down. It’s the f***ing Jets.”

LemonJello

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“One kid for every team I’ve gotten to play for. That’s the real Fitzmagic.”

Duchess

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And in other News scientist have concluded that the 3.4 magnitude earthquake that shook Indianapolis originated when 1/3 of the Colts fans got up to go to the concession stands during the game vs the Bengals.

LemonJello

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Does Progressive Insurance cover a replacement spleen?

LemonJello

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“I haven’t seen a loss of motor control like this by an eagle since the EPA banned DDT!”

SonOfSpam

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Haven’t seen a bunch of Cardinals go down that easily since the last Altar Boy Jamboree.

Duchess

Fun Fact: Alter Boy Jamboree was initially called Bowling for Concubines

Duchess

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And this kids is how the Butcher and Candlestick Maker got Baker into the tub

LemonJello

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Danica and Olivia share a nod and sad smile, then say in unison: “Three pump chump.”

Redshirt

Three?!

Duchess

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Wh…
Don’t you do it, don’t even think
Whoo…
I swear to gawd if you finish that I will strike you down
Whoop
(gun shot)

Last edited 1 month ago by Duchess
Downfield Matriculator

He . . . could . . . go . . . all . . . the . . . down at the 20

/smells toast

LemonJello

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“You promised that I could bang your friends if Dem’Boys lost to the Qardinals.”

LemonJello

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THESE LIONS, I CALL THE COPS IN CANNONBALL RUN BECAUSE THEY CAN’T STOP A JAGUAR IN A RACE AND I JUST LAUGH AT THEM!

LemonJello

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Even Ryan Shazier felt this and felt sorry for Baker.

ArmedandHammered

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Don’t mess up or Philip will yell at me…
Don’t mess up or Philip will yell at me…
Don’t mess up or Philip will yell at me…
Don’t mess up or Philip will yell at me…
Fuck

ArmedandHammered

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Only “bowling” action any of the Cowboys will see this year as the Pro Bowl is cancelled (not that any would have made it).

ArmedandHammered

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“Baby, this disappointment you feel right now, this is how I feel every time you drop your pants.”

ArmedandHammered

My other one was “Baby, you will get used to such a poor performance by your team, I certainly have to yours”.

Downfield Matriculator

I saw that live and thought she was being a bit more comforting . . . more like “Ay Papi, your team sucks balls but that’s OK because so do I”

Last edited 1 month ago by Downfield Matriculator
ArmedandHammered

I will always go for the most soul crushing scenario. I am not a glass half full, I am more of a “is this enough poison to kill me quickly or will I die in agonizing pain” kinda guy.

ArmedandHammered

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Who keeps casting Hands of Stone on Eagle receivers?

Downfield Matriculator

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This Baker Mayfield, I call him Date Night John Kerry because he is munching a lot of grass on Heinz Field.

Duchess

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Pictured here is something that hasn’t been truly relevant in 7years and also an allusion to a Key and Peele skit

Last edited 1 month ago by Duchess