2020 Quotables – Week 14 (Submissions)

Everyone getting ready for some fantasy football playoff action this week? Me too! You know, I had an autodrafted squad and didn’t even touch the roster until week 2 but I locked up a postseason spot last week actually and —

“No one cares.” “Doesn’t matter.”

Anyways, I didn’t catch a lick of football this weekend so you’ll have to HippoTalk for any thoughts on, you know, the NFL. For me, I’m a little sick, a lot of tired, and just really phoning this in. So, yeah, I guess you could go ahead and call me Carson Wentz — except Nick Foles has never won me a Super Bowl.

Anyways, you can find your Week 14 Quotables submissions below.


“What do you mean she ain’t verified, Pornhub?” -D. Haskins

I’m pretty sure no team has been the butt of more Quotables submissions than the Detroit Lions.

“That’s cute boy but rock music is ours; Elvis took it fair and square.”

I mean….this is actually just good football.

“Are the bounty payments prorated if they haven’t graduated yet?” -Cesar Sayoc

Bill Barr already on to bigger and better things, i see.

I assume the rest of you understand this….

When you gotta drop a Baltimore…
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blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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LemonJello

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I’d say “Look at all this cannon fodder,” but the truth is these wannabe Pattons will get a lot of young enlisted soldiers killed because of their poor decisions.

LemonJello

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♫♫ Fat Humps, Fat Humps, My gravy has no lumps. Fat Humps Fat Humps Fat Humps ♫♫

Don T

?solid. solid like a rockXCUSEME solid. solid like a…?
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Don T

Answer her: am I wearing clean underwear? See!
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Balls thinks these guys talk politics too much

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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Petting someone on the head in a “good boy” fashion? Seems like a Jerry Richardson move.

Viva La Tabula Raza

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*Pete Townshend files trademark infringement lawsuit.*

Duchess

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Breaking News: 3/4ths of the teams in the NFC North have petitioned the league to allow them to designate Aaron Rodgers as “Permanent QB” in the remaining conference games.

Duchess

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Why is it if you were to add the Team with No Name to the Team with No City you would still get a Team with No Playoff Chances?

Duchess

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I think this is called “Catching the Whoa-vid”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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“Great things happen in Glendale!”
–Nobody

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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“Dan Snyder won’t pay for unlimited data”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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HAND UP, PLEASE SHOOT!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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/Marvin Harrison cocks gun

Downfield Matriculator

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“Back in my day, we had standards. The ref is right there — throw the flag!”

— H. McCringleberry, Penn State 2012

BrettFavresColonoscopy

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/sphincter flies open

LemonJello

This is so good.

LemonJello

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Is this Gritty’s love child from that one spring break in Ft Lauderdale?

Redshirt

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(play music in the background)
NFL Flims- The Equalizer – YouTube

“Lamar Jackson valiantly takes the Browns to the Super Bowl.” – Ghost of John Facenda

King Hippo

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Man, I NEVAR had this little problem when I had access to the Senate cafeteria THANKS OBAMA!!!1111

LemonJello

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Oh! That’s what he meant by saying “Be back after dropping crab pots in Baltimore Harbor!”

Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
Game Time Decision

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These whipper snappers with their Snap Tok dances and Tik Chat memes. Git off my lawn

Game Time Decision

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The door was closer to containing Lamar then the Browns.

Game Time Decision

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Today we honour our tributes to COVID

SonOfSpam

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“Welcome to Miami, where the fans are enjoying the ‘Body Fat Percentage Jersey’ giveaway, sponsored by Papa John’s and Crisco.”

SonOfSpam

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Rookies nowadays are responsible for providing the head coach with enthusiastic directions to the nearest Hometown Buffet.

LemonJello

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Yakety Sax, Sad Trombone and the Price Is Right Loser Horn all fight for the honor of NOT being used in this clip.

Game Time Decision

I’m kinda surprised they even made it to the LOS

LemonJello

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♫♫ “I’m a little gravy boat, short and stout!” ♫♫

Dunstan

“Gravy, you say?” — A. Reid

Game Time Decision

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He did it all for the dookie

ballsofsteelandfury

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I CALL THIS COVID CHARLIE BECAUSE IT’S GONNA WIPE OUT MORE YOUNG SOLDIERS THAN THE VIET CONG!

SonOfSpam

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This must be that rare “Hilton with a bunch of black guys” video where Paris isn’t cum-engulfed.

Game Time Decision

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She’s from Canada, you wouldn’t know her.

ArmedandHammered

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Wait, you mean you can actually see them when you talk to them? – Manti T.

litre_cola

I cam here to make a Lenay Kukua joke. Glad to see it taken care of.

ArmedandHammered

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Damn! You almost scared the shit out of me!

ballsofsteelandfury

This is brilliant

ArmedandHammered

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“I cannot have anyone on this team show more competence than I possess – get rid of them!” – D. Snyder

LemonJello

Toady: “But, Supreme Leader Snyder, they’re the other team…”

D. Snyder: “I SAID GET RID OF THEM! EXECUTE ORDER 66!”