Your “Well – Look At That?!” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

Another big day here at [DFO]. This morning’s missive, “Get To Know A Microbrew!” was the site’s 2500th post.

 

THAT’S GOOD HUSTLE!


To reflect back, DFO’s first post was from Internet Dad on March 11, 2015. The appropriate title? “A Place For Your Dick Jokes“.

The entire post is just the title and then comments to the effect of, “What do we do now?” There were six total posts that day. A few were of the “Look what I can do!” variety; the first sizable post was Rikki’s post about “Mock Draft Reject: Artist To Compose The Soundtrack To Your Life”. From those humble beginnings, greatness!

Looking at the site stats, and being a History & English major, it seems we average around 1000 views per day during the football season, and about 600 views during the off-season. I’m not sure if that’s individual unique views or each page reset after Moose posts a gif.

Either way, I could watch these two forever.

The best ever one-day total at DFO was August 9, 2015, with 3890 views. This was 9 days after “Black Friday” on KSK, and the positive words of one Covalent Blonde, who reminded us to look ahead in her “After The Yellow Bar” post. Plus, Kommenters who were already at DFO were posting links to this site in the comments of the “Farewell” articles. So it explains why there’d be a spike in activity leading up to the…Pro Bowl?

The most popular post that day was TrollSoHard’s “THIS WEEK IN F**K YOU: OUR (FORMER) UPROXX OVERLORDS” post from August 7, clearly outlining how many of us drifted to the sanctuary that is DFO. But, you can’t discount Martin’s “Sexy Friday, Starring Emily Ratajkowski” post as an incentive to stay. (It’s a shame most of the pictures don’t open any more. I assume they were of Ms. Ratajkowski feeding orphans and healing the impotent with her touch.) Both of these were the most popular posts on DFO for three days straight, only touched on Sunday by the Pro Bowl open thread.

[Looking back, it’s hard not to wonder where some of the early Commentists/Kommenters have gone. People move on, I suppose. For instance, I assume Sill went to Barstool Sports or The Ringer, given his genial, conciliatory nature. Also, it’s sad so many gifs & pictures have been lost in the internet ether. There’s some quality work that has disappeared.]

I remember making the journey over after the Black Friday purge. I think someone put a link in Ape’s farewell post (since deleted), and that’s how I ended up here. NO TAKEBACKS! My first DFO comment was on August 11, 2015, and my first DFO post was the New Year’s Day classic, “Pete Carroll Tries To Rally The Team“. Since then, I’ve become the irregular DFO non-game-day Open Thread purveyor, “Walking Dead” observer, occasional Canadian History teacher, and sometime long-form content provider.

It feels weird talking about DFO’s history despite having not been around since the start, kinda like Dio reflecting on the legacy of Black Sabbath.

But how do I feel, looking back on everything?

Here’s to 2500 more posts. I’d glad to be a part.


Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Penguins at Hurricanes – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
    • Blackhawks at Wild – 8:00PM | NBCSN
    • Flames at Predators – 8:00PM | Sportsnet1
  • NCAA: highlighted contests
    • South Carolina at Florida – 7:00PM | ESPN
    • St. John’s at Marquette – 8:00PM | FS1
    • Indiana at Iowa – 9:00PM | ESPN
  • Curling: 2017 Scotties Tournament of Hearts: Draw #10 – 7:30PM | TSN

Plus, if you need help being happy/ier, here’s the new Archer promo:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2KxL7pEy8s

So…HOW YOU DOIN’?

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Brocky

alright, i’m off to dreamland. gonna play this as ambient noise. night night

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8WoCMHD_e0

WCS

I don’t know if that’s a “THANKS OBAMA” or a “TRUMP’S AMERICA.”

Brocky

if watching the offspring of two characters from a 90’s video game taking a selife with a 70’s horror alien is what he meant, then thanks obama

Senor Weaselo

It’s not the fatality we need, but it’s the fatality we deserve.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Now I want to watch The Thing.
Thanks WCS.
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Unsurprised

Damn you. That scene freaks me out.

theeWeeBabySeamus

You think you’re freaked out now? Ponder this….
How did his sleeves suddenly get rolled up?
Huh?

Brocky

the chest cavity breathed out?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Let’s stay away from terms like “chest cavity”….considering before he got his arms all bit off n junk, he was about to defibrillate south of the dude’s liver.

But maybe.

Brocky

dang i never noticed, he’s nowhere near his heart.

i always found it weird the thing would have a heart attack. perfect replica or not, that makes no sense.

who knows, maybe if that schmuck had done it right, the ruse would not have been up.\ddafadvvasd

time for bed.. putting way too much thought into this.

Senor Weaselo

How many times do I have to say it, I don’t want to watch Teeth!

WCS

Xenomorph (Alien) vs. John Carpenter’s The Thing: WHO YA GOT?

If you say (type?) Xenomorph, you’re wrong.

Senor Weaselo

Imagine Xenomorphs having to figure out which one’s infected!

Unsurprised

They’d just stab the fuck out of each other until one doesn’t bleed acid, and then keep stabbing. Basically a modified form of the escape plan from Alien Resurrection.

Brocky

so…. what happens if the thing absorbs a facehugger?

does the thing just become that much more creative?

WCS

DEAR GOD IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW WAKE UP SHEEPLE

Brocky

that’s almost too mean….

….almost

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Not with that lying piece of shit.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Btw, I fucking love being out in Colorado just for the beer. Tonight I drank a Left Hand Extrovert IPA, Left Hand Sawtooth Ale, Avery Liliko’i Kepolo, Crazy Mountain Neomexicanus Native Pale Ale, and Odell Tree Shaker Imperial Peach IPA. All were at the local liquor store. So easy to get drunk on good stuff. And not just because of the altitude.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening

WCS

Joe Scarborough is playing an Elvis Costello song with Stay Human on Colbert. This is a thing that’s actually happening.

Unsurprised

Why can’t he just die already like the intern he killed?

http://gawker.com/remember-when-a-dead-intern-was-found-in-joe-scarboroug-1711985081

Senor Weaselo

Padre Weaselo’s working on one of his favorite riffs, the piano solo. So now it’s stuck in my head.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7-zSvOBFqw

Brocky

i’ve thought of trying to contribute to the site, but really struggle to add anything.

I love pop culture, but I’m not nearly attuned enough to any one aspect to give any sort of commentary.

my cynacism is relatively routine. idk.

i’m buying a car. its fucking weird. a column on my inability to effectively adult? wtf, yeah you guys would read it, but i doubt it’d be worth reading. blarg. stuff. i’m tired.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’d read it. Buying cars sucks.

ballsofsteelandfury

It does not matter, man. We would love to have you contribute. Write something up and send it to me. Anything you are interested in will be interesting.

Senor Weaselo

Is it a remotely cool thing? Is it clever? Then you’re already two steps ahead of me!

Brocky
BrettFavresColonoscopy

I third what they said. You’d be surprised at how the routine reads if the author is interested in it. See: David Sedarid’s Santaland Diaries, Karl Ove Knausgaard’s memoirs, and tWBS writing about a hot Aussie Nazi

theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Bite me.

theeWeeBabySeamus

You heard big bird….

“It’s a lot bigger than the others.”

So…yeah.

Don T

I’d read it, for sure. Last month I traded-in the soul-crushing monstrosity that afflicted me for months. I even had to recur to “Do NOT make me leave here in [sobs] THAAAAAT”.

Unsurprised

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Brocky

I imagine seamus put a lot of time and effort into the this pic.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I can’t claim this one, but I won’t say I don’t have some that are….similar.

Senor Weaselo

Hello yes, this is Dr. Dog?

Brocky

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Brocky

I swear my brother only keeps in touch by messaging about the random stuff he sees at his clinic.

Unsurprised

The hardest part for seamus is keeping the cat from clawing the rubber gloves off too soon.

Brocky

black friday, man, Can’t remember the last time I was in a funk for so long.

internet bros, you’re my bros.

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lko6dqDJ3P1qznsy4.png

Brocky

evening. feels like a while since i’ve been here, what’s going on…

http://seveninchesofyourtime.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/earthgirlsareeasy8.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK; here’s what actually been going on.
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Senor Weaselo

While we’re on the subject, BACK OFF SHE’S MINE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nT1VQkTTT7M

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I doooooooooooooooooooon’t think so…..

http://i2.xxgifs.com/galleries/2015/03/20/big/45942-emma-watson.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Unsurprised

I’m sorry. I wasn’t listening.

http://s9.postimg.org/mntl6y0bj/Mx_Tqq6k.gif

Unsurprised

She was originally supposed to be Mia in La La Land, which would have been terrible.

Unsurprised

Although not even remotely as terrible as Miles Teller as Sebastian. People would burn down theaters if such a punchable douche played such an arrogant asshole in that movie.

Romonobyl

So if Romo goes to the “Texans”, which we doubt is really a thing, then wouldn’t that also retroactively make him of questionable existence? If so, then technically this never happened:
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view7/4835470/tony-romo-botched-snap-o.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

All gifs happened.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Both, either, or some combination thereof.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Fair enough.

Romonobyl

grumblegrumblewhatshermomlooklikegrumblegrumble.
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ballsofsteelandfury

Well done, everyone! Give yourselves a big hearty handy. Well, heartier than you normally would. You deserve it.

To another 2500!

Senor Weaselo

+1 finger gun to you, sir!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Save it for….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

balls’ HS photos?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Granite; it would seem as though that was the case, but he was a balls model in college.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Mr. Robopolis; I believe we’ve found the source of your headaches.”

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Senor Weaselo

Oh hey, Walk the Line is on.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

COMEDY BONER ALERT!

WARNING!

Shogun Marcus

Whoa whoa whoa…you wearing proper safety equipment for such a hawt take?!
http://www.badastronomy.com/pix/sith/thermalsuit.jpg

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

For maximum effect pair with Sex Panther.

Romonobyl

Think of the wonderful, magical memories that will live in our hearts, and bowels, forever:
http://tribzap2it.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/tom-brady-high-five-fail.gif
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I’m sure there are many more.

WCS

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Romonobyl

My post was #2500!?!?!?!
I’M SOMEBODY NOW!!!!!!!
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WCS
Romonobyl

I was hoping that said “YOUR WEINER!”, because I never got so much as a participation ribbon in that department.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

ARISE, CHICKEN!!!

Sharkbait

I’m disappointed they didn’t make any of those this past season

Senor Weaselo

It was nice of Scott Van Pelt to have that as a thing though.

Sharkbait

Someone must have run a Jap Play on him just now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Shogun Marcus

Whenever I see Milo Gostabyourselfintheanus, I think of this.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=DU7Ngr1P3Ic

Sharkbait

Holy shit I forgot that was a thing for a while.

Shogun Marcus

Inorite? Many college evenings lovingly wasted watching this. Then I forgot all about it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Shogun Marcus

I knew there was an uprising (in my PANTS, up top.) forming, but I didn’t know where to go. Think it was Lord Revisisle who finally guided me over.

theeWeeBabySeamus

On mah tits.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
King Hippo

Just so you know, this picture made my day, Moose. Danke schoen.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I concur.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

Yeah….ok.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

So is he. Trust me.

King Hippo

well…game night and whatnot…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I meant just weed; I shouldn’t be so specific in my presumptions.

theeWeeBabySeamus
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Cop a buzz, man…….

litre_cola

I came over from someone’s komment after Ape’s see-you-bye. We brought a lot of great talent with us.

/rolls up towel
/snaps towel on asses hard
/on to WICHITA!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Horatio Cornblower

I just checked and the first ever comment is Chris and the comment is “Thanks Chris, you’re great”

Awesome.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

DTZM upon creating the site:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvAnTkJntJY

King Hippo

The local NBC station pre-empted “This Is Us” for the ACC syndicated broadcast of NC State/Georgia Tech. I am enjoying the sorrow this shitshow will bring to ppl like the mouthbreather I saw in Target today. In his U*NC T-shirt and “MAGA” hat (still, swear to God, the first I’ve actually seen in NC).

Sharkbait

I shouldn’t be surprised people still wear those things.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hey look. We remembered how to do the baxsetballing.
For now.

Shogun Marcus

Is it wrong that I want that guy to take the team as far as possible?

King Hippo

No problem, long as he still fired!!

/Dude got issues, team playing mostly to spite him now.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
sunrisesunrise

Fuck Jonathan Quick with a broken stick.

Shogun Marcus

I keep hearing that, but no one says what they are!

theeWeeBabySeamus

With any luck, they never will.

King Hippo

TOO LATE. This is a safe space. HEE HEE

King Hippo

None of his teams have ever had much discipline, as he’s more of a “buddy/buddy” kind of guy. He hits the bars, and apparently was trying to match Wilt Chamberlain for sowing his seed all over.

He got run out of Alabama mid-season a decade ago because he was allegedly fucking (and not very on the sly) the daughter of a prominent booster. Who happened to be a co-ed (and maybe a cheerleader).

This was an issue, but less so, when winning, but the wheels came off late last season and he got rid of the assistant who did most of the coaching (after fighting with him at practice multiple times). Replaced him with recruiters, including the guy who got our NBA lottery pick PG his “compensation package.”

Gottfried always played favourites, but it got WAY worse this year with Smith. Basically told the staff he was gonna “play for me” out there. And he does. Makes not the slightest bit of pretend effort on defense. In the Syracuse game, his man scored 43 (averages like 7 ppg). No consequences.

Kids/teenagers can sniff a hypocrite a mile away, and they have absolutely zero respect for him, and the team has had no internal chemistry all year. The day after Gottfried was fired, a local reporter noted that during the Duke game (our last win), a State player was looking into the stands during a timeout late in the game, when an assistant grabbed his elbow and told him to pay attention. The (unnamed) player responded “FUCK YOU.”

That was the poisonous atmosphere on this team during THEIR ONLY SHINING MOMENT of the season. Imagine what it was like in the 51-point loss in Chapel Hill, or the three consecutive 20+ point beatdowns where the team quit (as publicly called out by the opposing players in the postgame) leading up to the announcement (he was 100% fired after the 2nd beatdown, a 30-point loss to a bad Wake Forest team).

Sorry, that really IS teh short version!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m actually pleased that you didn’t dig deeper.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

[Waits patiently for someone to post something political, because that always happens these days, but gets impatient after an hour]

FINE! HERE!

http://media.boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/peabe.jpg

[Stomps off as everyone stares blankly]

Sharkbait

Can’t let you be the only one

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That is good.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Sometimes I wait too; I hate that this thing is so fucked up and I occupies my worrisome personality. Especially considering in 50,000 years it won’t even register (depending on half-life).

http://www.slate.com/content/dam/slate/blogs/xx_factor/2017/01/Dark-Side-Of-The-Moon.gif.CROP.original-original.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Did anybody ever do the

“My Tour of the Hotdog Factory”

post?

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

” each page reset after Moose posts a gif”

That only counts for 500 or so.
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Senor Weaselo

But how many HARFs is that?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I believe my gif to HARF ratio is about one HARF per one-hundred-twenty-seven gifs, but that could be my ego talking.
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Horatio Cornblower

I think my first post here might have been about having to put my dog to sleep.

You’re welcome.

Senor Weaselo

St. John’s-Marquette is a highlight? Bleach for all!
/watches Ice Giants-Ice Alouettes instead

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

My first post over here was about a week or so before we lost the old place, because it wasn’t #upforwhatever: https://www.doorfliesopen.com/index.php/2015/07/27/sidney-seau-discusses-her-hof-speech-with-roger-goodell/

I’m still rather happy with it, but most notable about it is a comment by Balls:

Also, thank you for the Roger Goodell is a National Disgrace tag! I will use it on every single post I write.

While I cannot take credit for creating the tag (it was sitting right there!), I am amused that this piece of DFO history was popularized because of that post. And I’m quite certain Balls has fulfilled his promise from then.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

You bet i have!