When You Are More Interested In Who Is Going To Lose Thursday Night Open Thread

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TheRevanchist

A face only your mother loves… repeatedly.
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Wow, do we have the match up that you don’t want to see.  I mean, sure, maybe OBJ will make some glorious catch.  But, really, no one likes either team.  Just look at this schmuck.

"Public Intoxication" arrest which means he was being a dick

That’s a Jim Spanfeller-level punchable face.

Let’s talk about the Steelers first, though.  I’m still not sure how they corralled in the egos of Antonio Brown and that dude who now plays RB for the Jets.  Whatever his name is.  He doesn’t matter anymore, now that we know that O-line was the real reason that running backs do well in the Steelers system.  Good luck, Jets.

Tomlinson, who comes across like a real jackass in every interview he has ever done, going back to when he was 3 and someone asked him to sing the ABC’s, has done a fantastic job keeping this team on track.  I would like to think that he would be nice to someone in his life.  His wife?  Mom?  The sheep he drags to the bedroom and calls “Baker”?  I don’t know who, but there has to be someone.

At QB, they have some putz who is just a putz.  Middleman Putz might be his name.  That’s how much I care.  He’s serviceable, like a great many QBs you see in this league.  That’s good enough.

The defense on this team is still tough.  Not Patriots tough.  Not Niners tough.  Not Bills tough.  But, definitely not a cake walk.  That’s why they should win this game, and, also, because I like to hate on The Browns.

Now, let’s get to the part that is hard to talk about:  Flaker Mayfield and the Brown turds.

They finally won last week!  Yeah!  3 wins, baby.  They are definitely going all the way.  All the way to another top 10 draft pick, where they will probably draft a QB for when Mayfield becomes a backup on another team and fades into Oblivion.  (Side note:  I’m picking up Oblivion for the XB1 once I’m done playing Skyrim… again.)

But, last week was a fluke when you look at their season as a whole.  OBJ had catches.  Mayfield didn’t get intercepted (I would fact check that, but I don’t really want to).  They stopped the run.  Sort of, anyway, as the Bills should have ran it more, aside from Josh Allen.

This week, the Browns are going to have a hard time stopping the run.  The Steelers aren’t scoring a ton of rushing TDs, but they know how to utilize the run game effectively.  Kitchens doesn’t really garner a lot of surety as a head coach.  He is going to have to play his linebackers in a manner that negates the run.

Since this is a rivalry game, expect a fun game to watch.  Really, either team that loses is a win for us all.

“Fair weather fans are HILARIOUS to me…” – Emily Mayfield, wife of Baker, which means she made that choice voluntarily (that we know of), which should tell you everything you need to know about her

Still curious as to why the Browns are favored.  They are the Browns, after all.  Historical levels of losing that make Detroit fans jealous.

Talk about whatever below.

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TheRevanchist
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Col. Duke LaCross

They gonna put in the duck guy or what?

BugEyedBoo
BugEyedBoo

“He’s not much of a runner. ” But he makes up for it by being not much of a passer.

blaxabbath

Balanced player.

litre_cola

Double threat.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

“And the defense balances all that up by not tackling.”
—John McKay

Brocky

I was just gonna quote him!

blaxabbath

Make the comment.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Great minds blah blah blah.

King Hippo

How goddamned stupid is Kitchens? He called timeout!

WCS

3rd and 24? NFL BLITZ!

blaxabbath

Something something pin their ears back.

Col. Duke LaCross

That was Jameis-esque.

King Hippo

Nobody wants this dingleberry of a ballgame

Brocky

Playing the undertakers theme when an injured player is leaving the field?

That’s just mean

blaxabbath

Why do you guys keep knowing things like 30 seconds before me?

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

You live in the darkest timeline. Which is the same as ours, just delayed 30 seconds.

blaxabbath

This is the first year I’ve done daylight savings time. Why does everyone make a thing of talking about it? It’s an hour on one day. Big whoop.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Because people are whiny and suck bagfuls of shit.

litre_cola

I have a toddler it is hell on earth. I am up at 430 every day now instead of 530 or 6.

blaxabbath

Oh yeah — how is Deci?

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

On days I have to go to the orifice, I set my alarm for 0410 for wake up. Invariably, I awaken at 0355 or 0400, what the fuck! I know most of y’all here are still at the “I AM IMMORTAL FUCK YOU OLD PEOPLE, OK BOOMER” but let me tell ya not being able sleep when you want to is a fucking horrible thing.

Brocky

You didn’t like briefly pause your dvr then resume, then not realize you’re not caught up?

My dad does it all the time

blaxabbath

I’m streaming on Amazon.

Brocky

There you go. Complain about the delay tonsmazon

blaxabbath

You think they’re suppressing my conservative voice?

King Hippo

Ratbirds/500s not even a national game. FUCK YOU, Shield

blaxabbath

Jim and Bunk in a Tom Clancy show?

Well I’ll be damned.

theeWeeBabySeamus

At least Shan’klor is having a good night.

WCS

PRAISE HER

King Hippo

Praise all over this here league in 2019!

jjfozz

Gawd

Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

Thank you Brownies!

King Hippo

yeah, this is bad even by their standards

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve mostly hated the Steelers since the 70s except for those periods of time since then that they really sucked, hard to hate losers (Go Bubby Brister!). But I like to see the Browns potentially winning this game.

hippofant
hippofant

I still hate the Steelers for stealing that Super Bowl from Fitz. That’s a real karmic wrong imo.

Brocky

Fitzgerald sealed his own fate by not leaving Arizona when he had the chance. I understand wanting to remain loyal, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

I was rooting so hard for the panthers in 2015 just cuz of peanut

blaxabbath

You’re so right. Fitz has gotten a lot of money for staying there.

blaxabbath

As much as I want Fitz to have SB (and let Warner get one in AZ) — it’s always going to be a greater priority to see the Bidwills fail and — in some seasons, like 2019 — die.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I was in Kuwait for that one and in order to watch the game I would have had to go to the mess hall at Camp Arifjan at 4 am on the day to watch the game instead of just sleeping through it in my room at the Kuwait Hilton Resort. Not a difficult decision.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Kordell Stewart would like a word with you. Unfortunately, even he doesn’t know where he is these days.

King Hippo

c’mon, don’t say “Fire Island men’s room”

litre_cola

Fucking kickers.

jjfozz

Tell me that “ricoh” audible was a nod to Uncle Ricoh in Napoleon Dynamite

King Hippo

#ThePauls, doing nothing to deliver the kill shot. Again.

JustStopDude
JustStopDude

That was a pretty sick play ..

jjfozz

That’s why you do the tip drill

King Hippo

yeah, Troy, that’s TOTES on the left tackle there

King Hippo

Wonder if anybody ever sneak it over RG like that, and had their head fall clean off? That’d be pretty funny.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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blaxabbath

I’m surprised that crowd isn’t more amped. They can stick a dagger in PIT right here.

blaxabbath

HAHA! And then the Browns drop a ball that hit square into his open hands.

King Hippo

is very #ThePauls

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well, I don’t prefer goats’ milk, but the act of milking them is very erotic.

hippofant
hippofant

I’ll be honest, I have no clue what’s going on this game. Browns offense is moving the ball, Steelers O-line is leaking like a sieve. Chalk it up to Thursday night idiocy?

King Hippo

yeah, rough game off a short week, Yinz is all beat up

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

Angela Lansbury? SHE FUCKS!

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

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Why don’t you pass the time by playing a little solitaire?

blaxabbath

The problem with a lot of detergents is that they don’t get the Bengals off your jersey. Instead, they just smear it all over and it get’s on everything in the wash.

King Hippo

That might have been that dopey fuck’s best throw of the day

blaxabbath

Dopey is such an underrated adjective.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

and he is more fun than Grumpy.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve been drinking wine for the last 5 hours, I may end up doing a imitation of Sleepy.

blaxabbath

So is Big Ben done? PIT gonna Flacco him off to mentor Jameis and give this Rudolpho the keys to Sixburgh?

LemonJello
LemonJello

Another re-make of The Longest Yard?

jjfozz

“JuJu, what day is it?”
“Lemon?”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yep, he’s fine!!!!!

– Trent Green

LemonJello
LemonJello

Those three helmets colliding had to sound like big, hollow coconuts

King Hippo

they should have Gilligan’s Island clips for that

theeWeeBabySeamus

JuJu ded?

scotchnaut

I’ve heard that certain JuJu’s that seem dead will rise three days from now.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hee hee.

WCS

…and Juju dies

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

JuJu DedDed

Dunstan
Dunstan

“Stuttering Nazi” was one of the less successful members of Howard Stern’s Wack Pack

theeWeeBabySeamus

Shit. I knew I shouldn’t have started Conner.

litre_cola

Let’s not be too quick to judge.

theeWeeBabySeamus

You shush, smartypants.

blaxabbath

Why? My FF opponent started him.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Injured his shoulder again. Questionable to return.

blaxabbath

Delicious.

I’m tied for first in FF this year. 2019 is the season I’ve followed the NFL least (previous winner: 2018) and this is the only time I haven’t been bottom of the FF league. It’s been an enjoyable way to exit any association with the sport. Seriously, I got Raiders season tickets and I may just sell them seven times a year.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Come with me if you want to live.

jjfozz

Things I’d rather see than Knives Out:
1. My father naked.
2. His father naked.
3. Kathy Bates naked.
4. The Browns winning a Super Bowl.
5. All of the Browns naked.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Several of those are pretty high on my regular list.

jjfozz

Well, my grandfather was pretty buff….

King Hippo

what about your dad AND your granddad, jerking it to Ms. Bates?

jjfozz

Christ, you are fucking twisted. And I love you.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I have just downloaded that video.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

20 years ago, my 1916-born granddad was living with me. Because of things, I happened to have to observe him in his uncensored glory on occasion. Once he died a few years ago, at age 98, I started to think about how I am going to shuffle off this mortal coil in a manner that will spare anyone having to observe my naked or dog-eaten corpse.

hippofant
hippofant

Okay, someone’s gotta gif Mayfield there.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

herodotus450
herodotus450

Is there a shirt that’s like the opposite of a vest, all arms but no middle part?

LemonJello
LemonJello

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Don T

From the Ed Gein collection

jjfozz

Needs to have dried vaginas in lieu of buttons

blaxabbath

This edition of the Browns’ uniforms are objectively better — but I like the old ugly ones better.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Literally objectively.

blaxabbath

No — everyone recognizes these uniforms as better to look at.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It’s science.

blaxabbath

It appears that Romo is going to have a long enjoyable broadcast career. I’m looking forward to the day he slips up and talks about working for Jerruh.

blaxabbath

I seriously do not care about towing capacity of my pick up.

King Hippo

But wasting energy OWNS THE LIBTARDS

Dunstan
Dunstan

I prefer leasing my libtards. I know people say it costs more, but I like being able to have a new libtard every couple of years.

blaxabbath

“Leasing — or as I call it fleecing — is most expensive way to trigger a libtard.”


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litre_cola

So you measure your penis with a ruler?

LemonJello
LemonJello

What about carrying capacity for cranked out tweakers?

blaxabbath

Cranked out is a funny term.

litre_cola

That isn’t Landry.

King Hippo

Honestly have no idea who that was

LemonJello
LemonJello

Nope.
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hippofant
hippofant

Underthrown ball to a receiver who’d beaten the coverage, DB with hand in between receivers’s hands, TROY AIKMAN BLAMES THE RECEIVER

scotchnaut

As a bottom, you wouldn’t think he’d go there.

LemonJello
LemonJello

A Chubb with no gain? Damn high school flashbacks…

theeWeeBabySeamus

That Chubb went down.

jjfozz

Ben looks like a stand in for the sheriff on Stranger Things

King Hippo

handcuffs DO aid in the raping process

jjfozz

Oh hey Denis Leary, that joke was funny: THIRTY FUCKING YEARS AGO!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That’s the spirit, except he wasn’t funny then either.

jjfozz

I will admit to you, my brethren, I’m disillusioned at work. I’m too old to make a change, I have a lot of financial responsibilities. I can feel my anger and negativity closing in on me. What to do?

LemonJello
LemonJello

Sabotage your asshole co-workers?

jjfozz

I’m working on that. They are young and dumb, this old wolf has a few tricks up his sleeve. Fucking little shits.

litre_cola

Eat edibles at work to at least make it enjoyable?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Petronel

It’s a guaranteed never-ending source of amusement at work, if you can set it up just right. (Gotta make your own job satisfaction sometimes.)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

*co-worker’s assholes

King Hippo

finger them using one of Weaselo’s ghost pepper sauces. BOOM!

King Hippo

5-state killin’ spree!

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Your boss’s wife since you lost yours.

jjfozz

The boss’s wife works at the company. She had big jugs but is a dramatic, incompetent stupid gash. I wouldn’t fuck her with King Hippo’s penis

King Hippo

yeah, ain’t nobody gonna be pleased with that

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Just wipe it on the curtains after.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Hard drugs?

Col. Duke LaCross

I started going to therapy lately. But that probably won’t help with the financial stuff. That shit is expensive.

scotchnaut

Suck it up and quit being a snowflake? Given your comment history, that’s exactly what you’d tell your younger co-workers.

jjfozz

Your words cut, but they make sense.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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jjfozz

Yeah, Scotchnaut nailed me. I feel like Christy Canyon after a date with Peter North and Ron Jeremy.

Don T

Cultivate emotional detachment, weed.

Dunstan
Dunstan

GOOD. GOOD. Embrace your anger! It makes you strong….

jjfozz

Michigan vs. Michigan State, yeah no one cares. Unless they live in Michigan.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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King Hippo

one presumes this is foreplay?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

That NFL top 100 players is gonna be like 60 cowboys, 38 Patriots, and brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers

Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

And no Steelers, if Fouts and Art Shell have their wicked way

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Fouts and Art Shell have their wicked way

Thanks for that visual.

Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

Sorry!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

No, that is HOT…….

Well, maybe just sweaty.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers

One instance where I don’t think it can be both.

Gumbygirl
Gumbygirl

Pricey coloring book

jjfozz

I never get this commercial. A set of color pencils and a notebook would run you about $20.

jjfozz

Imagine the Watt household next to the Gronkowski household. Their would be a date rape blackhole the size of the Indian Ocean

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

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King Hippo

#ThePauls best be careful not to wear that KHunt out before December

jjfozz

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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