Lesser Footy May Day – How Many tWBS’s Shall There Be?

King Hippo
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Yes, those lovable, cuddly Krauts are in full swing on FS1 and assorted sister channels.  Dortmund/Wolfsburg and Borussia Unpronounceable/Aspirin FC highlight the 9:30 slate.  Bayern (the side you’ve heard of) gets Eintracht Frankfurt at 12:30, and should be ok viewing.  Except…the play has been choppy after the long, weird break.  To put it mildly.  It reminds one of roller derby without the skates.

But, hope springs eternal.  And at least SOMETHING is fucking on, that isn’t golfer assholes or race car rednecks.

Back to the week’s theme, we honor Mark by watching Lesser Footy, even if he ain’t around to joshingly shit upon it.  A question has arisen, though.  There was a long-standing meme/joke about a Lesser Footy scoreline constituting “a tWBS” – based on his complaints about this always being the final tally.  But hark, was that tally 1-nil or nil-nil??  LET THE PPLS VOTE!

/Hippo can nae figure out the “Insert Poll” plug-in, so is write-in time, y’all.

//Drink and Gamble, as tWBS would have wanted.  But don’t “dance like nobody is watching” however much he would like such cliche advice.

///Yes, Pretend Machester City is still running rampant, as the Pretend Calendar turns to 2036.

////Also, this song kicks all the ass, and shits out said ass for breakfast:

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King Hippo
King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I fell asleep on the couch with my dog while watching a KBO league game and the Dr. Mrs. turned the TV off! Ain’t right.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

We’re watching the ponies again and in the 8th race at Gulf Stream the 10 horse was named Sir Seamus. I was too late on the bet.
How did it do?

Won wire to wire. I called it right before the post.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

Moose’s Dead Or Alive tribute gifs always make me dizzy.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Dunstan

I’m seeing double! FOUR Connie Sellecas!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

Found a funny:

The Bible is very vague as to how much Jesus could bench

Senor Weaselo

And the Lord said, “Doth thou even lift?”

scotchnaut

Jesus was a carpenter for ffs. I’d say he could bench at least 16 or 17, depending on how many sermon gigs he had booked that month.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Living room could use an upgrade.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Then a vibrating spooge-grade!

Spoogegate.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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rockingdog

Ha

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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The conspiracy theorists needs to focus on something legitimate.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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ballsofsteelandfury

The Bayern game was pretty good. Lots of scoring…

litre_cola

I turned it off at the half. Oops

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Obviously not a flag code expert.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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litre_cola

Oh I would like to know what this expert has to say

SonOfSpam

He probably has some cogent ideas about race relations.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

And bacon-wrapped hush puppies, I bet he has some pretty strong (and well-founded) opinions about those as well.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh man, I never should have looked this recipe up…

https://tasty.co/recipe/bacon-cheddar-jalapeno-stuffed-hush-puppies

scotchnaut

Wanted to go for a walk today but in the last four days the weather has transitioned from 10 degrees Celsius with a stiff wind (“Phrasing!”-tWBS) to 31. That ain’t right.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Senor Weaselo

We need more Jonathan Pearce… fucking up the meaning of armament.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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scotchnaut

Watching old episodes of Tough Crowd because… ya know what-there’s no ‘because’ reason anymore

Horatio Cornblower

Your newest New York Jet likes his milk low-fat and room temperature, the same way I like my women.

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/29210586/new-york-jets-signing-qb-joe-flacco-one-year-deal

herodotus450

If I ever get my grant money back, I’m gonna create a clone-hybrid of Cutler and Joe Flacco; it will be the perfect temperment quarteredback!

Senor Weaselo

That’s the QB equivalent of Abradolf Lincler?

scotchnaut

Low Fat was my fave Kung-Fu action star of the 70’s! Shame about him succumbing to anorexia…

Brick Meathook

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SonOfSpam

/cums

– Ernie

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That took me a second but oh god.

scotchnaut

Life In Northern Ontario:

It’s finally warm weather time. Yay! What this means to me as a guy that has a 90 minute (total) commute on two separate highways? Well, because the blackflies are out full force in the forests, various animals wander on to the highway looking for relief. In the morning you can guess the size/type of the animal that was run over that night by the size of the bloodmarks on the road. Adult male mooses* make the largest ones and it’s not even close.

*hope I haven’t triggered any commenters, or one specifically

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I just use a calming GIF.

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I have several Moose photos hung up in my house from a local wildlife photographer:
http://petereades.com/

scotchnaut

[clicks on the site provided]

As far as place names are concerned Golden, Colorado is my 2nd favorite place to be in. First place? Christy, Canyon.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It’s not raining there.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Golden Showers…… you see.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

There was a sports bar that opened up near us that gave us like 20 potatoes worth of fries the time we ate there. I am going to miss that place because we cooked those leftover fries into breakfast stuff for days.

litre_cola

I find an air fryer is great for reheating fries.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That is also the the name of a bong.

scotchnaut

There are Irish people dying because they don’t have enough potatoes! (and because no one taught them to fish, god they’re so stupid!)

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“Agreed.”

-Lord Melbourne

Beerguyrob

“But the babies taste great!”

— J. Swift.

litre_cola

I will take the BD victory

Fronkenshteen

Christ. Another one for Havertz.

Horatio Cornblower

Ryan Leaf has been arrested on a domestic battery charge.

So he’s doing great.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Please tell me he was conducting home invasions in the Philadelphia area and giving those fans a taste of their own medicine.

scotchnaut

I look forward to the inevitable “Ryan Leaf Finally Putting His Life Back Together” article that pops up every three years or so.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Due to previous record they will be four to six now, even with good behavior.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I guess I should just be glad that he has somewhere to stay. Or…at least, did.

Fronkenshteen

He’s working as an analyst for ESPN. Huh.

ArmedandHammered

Well, he was…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yeah now he’s more likely to be signed by the Cowboys

Game Time Decision

Moar like the potato skins now

litre_cola

Wine is my lifeblood

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m not suffering too much this morning (physically). Perhaps having a midnight homemade burrito featuring leftover sous vide tri tip and Popeye’s french fries is the magic bullet.

Fronkenshteen

Nordic Hulk angry.

litre_cola

Have a hundo on Dortmund and Haaland to score. COME ON GAMBLOR I WILL TAKE A 1-0 RESULT!

Fronkenshteen

Good luck. What odds did you get on that? Took Haaland over Kai Havertz in DFS, and have already been kicked in the nuts by that decision.

litre_cola

1.91 for Borussia Dortmund and 2 to 1 for Norwegian Hulk

litre_cola

It has been 1 nil. Due to his sarcastic tone that “Ooooh a 1 nothing game I bet it was sooooo exciting”

Horatio Cornblower

What Litre said.

ArmedandHammered

I agree with litre.

Game Time Decision

this

herodotus450

For me a “tWBS” will always be “two chicks at the same time in the bathroom at Camden Yards” I dont know bout you.

Horatio Cornblower

I refuse to believe that someone besides the other team scored at an Orioles game.

nomonkeyfun

Well “two chicks at the same time…” means in this case that he bought them dinner, put their kids through vet school, bought the tickets for the O’s game($.50 each for box seats) and then saw them fuck each other. So the other team did score.