Your “Everyone’s On Holiday” Monday Evening Open Thread

A very slow day today, as the US had President’s Day & Canada has Family Day. Fortunately, America’s 45th president has combined the two into one.

True love lives

NFL Nuggets:

  • Both Pouncey brothers have retired from the NFL.
    • Maurkice spent his whole career with the Steelers, and Mike played for the Dolphins & Chargers.
    • I assume they will spend their remaining days like OJ, looking for Aaron Hernandez’s real killer.
  • Washington has hired Chris Polian to be its director of pro personnel.
    • He is the son of Bill Polian, and spent 13 years with the Colts before moving on to the Falcons and then the Jags.
    • I guess there wasn’t an Eric Bieniemy Junior to overlook.
  • The City of St. Louis apparently wants $1 billion from the Rams over their relocation:

Although the St. Louis plaintiffs seek reimbursement for wasted expenses arising from allegedly futile efforts to keep the Rams in St. Louis, the case apparently also will attempt to recover a slice of the enhanced value of the team resulting from a relocation that the plaintiffs believe happened in defiance of the NFL’s applicable rules.

    • They cite the increased value of the team since the relocation, and the need to recover costs from what they believed was a good-faith attempt to try & keep the team from moving, and fraud when it became apparent that their efforts were non-starters.
      • Attempts to depose Rams – and Chargers – officials keep being missed and/or ‘rescheduled’ by team officials.
        • They want Spanos to testify about why he moved & how much his franchise value increased by moving in with Stan Kroenke.
      • There are also complaints that Kroenke and the NFL are dragging the case out, because they weren’t granted leave to move the case to either league-friendly federal court or arbitration.
    • I can’t believe they would question the good name & reputation of an NFL owner who is also a real estate developer and is married into the Wal-Mart family.
      • He’s just like us!

Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • NY Islanders vs Buffalo – 7:00pm | NBCSN
    • Florida vs Tampa Bay – 7:00pm | Sportsnet
    • Calgary vs Vancouver – 10:00pm | Sportsnet1
  • NBA:
    • Houston vs Washington – 7:00pm | NBATV
    • Miami vs LA Clippers – 10:00pm | NBATV
    • Brooklyn vs Sacramento – 10:00pm | TSN2
  • NCAA:
    • Virginia at Florida State – 7:00pm | ESPN
    • Texas Tech at TCU – 9:00pm | ESPN
  • WWE:
    • Monday Night Raw – 8:00pm | USA / Sportsnet360

I hope you enjoyed your respite, for tomorrow is the drudgery of starting a four-day week.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Viva La Tabula Raza

A buddy of mine made a spinner like Garfield has up top. It was adapted from some 60s board game. He had a lot more different choices that the spinner could land on from Garfield, like: Brush Teeth, Have a Cigarette, Make Coffee, Get Stoned, Go Back to Bed, Do a Bump, Have A Beer, etc. The first time I saw it I cracked the fuck up.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Tonight’s experiment with random booze involves tequila, mezcal, cointreau, grapefruit bitters, chocolate bitters, and grapefruit soda.

Not my best work.

Doktor Zymm

I was with you until the chocolate bitters

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I don’t think they’re making the difference here

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s way too much. Tequila and mezcal should not be mixed. That’s like putting Irish whiskey and Scotch in the same cocktail along with Irn-Bru and a wedge of orange.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Or mixing milk with orange juice. Blech.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I think we called that a “Suicide” when I was younger.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s what we called it when you went to the local pizza place, ordered a drink, got an empty cup, and then filled it yourself at the fountain with a little bit of everything that was offered.

Viva La Tabula Raza

My first experience with a Suicide was when you went and bought a snow cone from a snow cone/raspa vendor and specified you wanted a little bit of every flavor in there.

Doktor Zymm

Just ordered some fancy cocktail syrups, and picked up some blue gin recently. I really ought to get my ice maker up and running again and make myself some interesting cocktails

Viva La Tabula Raza

My fridge has a built in icemaker, but I have turned it off and make my own ever since I bought these.comment image

Doktor Zymm

I don’t have room in my freezer for trays. At the moment it’s kind of hazardous just to open the door as you’ll probably be attacked by a bag of dumplings or a stray apple tart

Viva La Tabula Raza

They do make 4-cube trays for dorm-size refrigerators…comment image

Doktor Zymm

If they make a version with a lid so I can wedge it sideways into an available bit of space then maybe, but even then it’ll get taken out when I need the space for something perishable. To be clear, the issue here is not the size of the freezer, it’s the amount of stuff I have in there

Viva La Tabula Raza
Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
bk109

You know they also make nylon ones (basically a partitioned bag, which you fill up and tie, so it doesn’t leak) that can be jammed into any free space you may have, right?

bk109

Since I can’t exaclty edit ^

https://www.amazon.com/Disposable-Cube-Pack-2400-Cubes
comment image

Though ^ can be also be found in basically every grocery store here (well, at least Sweden, Ireland, the uk and Germany über alles! )

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Mr. Ayo

Or, and hear me out, you could just grab that gin and drink it straight from the bottle like a true DFOer.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Charlie Allnut concurs heartily.
comment image

Viva La Tabula Raza

So I’ve been seeing this cat food ad where this woman is sitting reading a magazine with a gray cat sitting over her shoulder.
In the background you hear her daughter holler “Mom, I fell down!”
Woman says “Get a bandage.”
Daughter says “I’m bleeding!”
Woman says, “Get two.” And then feeds the cat.

Someone needs to call Child Protective Services on that fucking bitch.

Doktor Zymm

Cats always land on their feet, children do not. Advantage, cat

Viva La Tabula Raza

Cats are unable to open cans of cat food, though. Advantage, opposable thumbs.
Also, cats won’t land on their feet if you attach a diving weight or two to their back.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Dunstan

I’m having deja vu — did we discuss this before?

It’s a son though, isn’t it? And I’m totally on the side of the mom. The cat is adorable, and who wants to get up from reading on the couch just because some whiny kid has a boo-boo?

Viva La Tabula Raza

Maybe. I thought I brought it up on another site, but maybe I drunkenly did so here as well.
I dunno, I’ve never had kids or cats, so I guess my opinion is invalid.
comment image?cb=1335270411

Viva La Tabula Raza

Commissioner Gordon, please activate the Scotchnaut signal!

Viva La Tabula Raza

Just saw the ad again. Child’s voice, can’t discern gender.

blaxabbath

I bid an A G Spanos project today.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I had big plans to catch up on work today when there were no meetings. Spent the whole day napping and icing my back. It’s hell getting old.

rockingdog

found a funny:

ME: i have two things to do today
MY BRAIN: infinity things to do, got it
ME: no, just two
MY BRAIN: no point even starting

Viva La Tabula Raza

That’s how every work day starts for me. Usually at around 4 AM.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Waaaaay too accurate

Doktor Zymm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-ExKYM5xQY
I got to see this in the theater when it was released in the US, it belongs in any proper zombie movie marathon

Game Time Decision
Viva La Tabula Raza

There’s an early BOC tune for every occasion.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vdsUDNpM54

Viva La Tabula Raza

Something along these lines?comment image

Viva La Tabula Raza

Splitter!

herodotus450

The “Breaking” news on the NHL page of yahoo! sprots is… that you can now watch the NBA online. Pretty cool.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Right now I’m about killing time so it gets too dark for me to go out and harvest some kale, because I do not like kale and I don’t want to eat any of it.

ballsofsteelandfury

If you don’t like it, why are you growing it?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s zombie kale, it cannot be killed.

Game Time Decision

Salt it.

Doktor Zymm

Zombie goat could work too

litre_cola

Mmmmm zombie goat, the most forbidden goat.

Viva La Tabula Raza

comment image

Doktor Zymm

Donate to a food bank?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I can’t even get my neighbors to eat any of this stuff.

Doktor Zymm

I’ve made good pesto out of kale before, walnuts instead of pine nuts and chuck in some raw garlic, puree with olive oil

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m starting to feel guilty that I had to put on flip flops to go to my CVS which is within Los Angeles walking distance (which, as any Angeleno knows is REALLY close) and they have a full selection of wine, beer, and liquor.

Viva La Tabula Raza

comment image?w=800&h=515

Doktor Zymm

Pretty much, although you can add South Florida to the LOL column as well

Viva La Tabula Raza

They have their own column, it’s under “Let’s unmask and party!!!”

Doktor Zymm

Miami Beach has imposed a midnight nightlife curfew, because precautions, lol

Viva La Tabula Raza

Pandemic solved!!!

Gumbygirl

Everyone knows you can’t catch anything until after midnight, it’s in the Bible, duh!

Doktor Zymm

You’re also not supposed to get the coronavirus wet, very important!

WCS

Utter shitshow in Yinzburgh right now. We had five inches of snow overnight, then a lull. Now, it’s sleeting, and they’re saying an inch of ice by 07:00. I guess that means I won’t have to take Lil’ WCS to school.
comment image

Gumbygirl

My cousins lived on Elroy Ave in Brentwood. Back in the day it was one of those brick streets on a really steep hill that are a fun feature of the Greater Pittsburgh area. It was a spectacular shitshow when there was an icestorm!

Viva La Tabula Raza

“John Wayne was a fag. I installed two-way mirrors at his pad in Brentwood, and he came to the door in a dress.”
Wrong Brentwood, I guess.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uv_WGEHr4I

Doktor Zymm

Curious what sort of crazy rich person would go for this sort of yacht. If you can’t see in the picture, it’s flying an Iron Cross flag

IMG_20210215_1808116.jpg
Doktor Zymm

Closer up view

Doktor Zymm

Closer view with the photo actually attached

IMG_20210215_1809404.jpg
Viva La Tabula Raza

Can’t make it out, but maybe the boat belongs to one of the Knights of Malta. Maltese Cross looks exactly like the Iron Cross.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maltese_cross#Similar_crossescomment image

Doktor Zymm

I feel like the red background is important, but not sure how

Doktor Zymm

Oh! It’s the Knights Hospitaller cross!

ballsofsteelandfury

Isn’t that a Crusader cross?

Doktor Zymm

Yep, although VLTR is spot on, it’s used for all sorts of stuff in Malta nowadays, including their navy apparently. So I guess the US is being invaded by a very stylish Maltese naval yacht

Doktor Zymm

Hmm, according to this Maltese government website it’s the Merchant Flag of Malta
https://www.gov.mt/en/About%20Malta/pages/flags-symbols-and-their-use.aspx

Doktor Zymm

And according to additional internet, all civilian ships registered in Malta fly this flag. Neat!

Although not quite as fun as the Maltese navy invading with yachts

Last edited 3 years ago by Doktor Zymm
Viva La Tabula Raza

It’s also very popular on the leather vests of certain biker gangs.

Doktor Zymm

Now every time I see a biker with that patch I’m going to assume they are civilian vessels registered in Malta

Viva La Tabula Raza

This was a pretty good flick. I always liked Coburn.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AonZdAfEQgA

Viva La Tabula Raza

Also, firefighters use it a lot.

Fronkenshteen

Need to go to the liquor store.
Shouldn’t go to the liquor store.
Everyone’s gonna be mad if I go to the liquor store.
Fuck, should I go to the liquor store?
Godammit, I’m gonna go to the liquor store.
I’m gonna get killed when I get back from the liquor store.
KISS’s “Cold Gin” playing in my head.
I deserve to be the rummy who gets stomped by Alex & his droogs.
Still, my brain cries out for four or five more shots.
It’s early, and I’ll be up and ready to get boyo to school!
I am the Hank Kingsley of Mike Pences.
But I’m going to go get a drink.

Viva La Tabula Raza

As someone who chickened out of going to the package store today due to road conditions, I heartily support your decision.

Game Time Decision

Too bad Frank doesn’t deliver

/i assume yall live no where close to each other

Viva La Tabula Raza

My local package store delivers, but the roads were so shitty today that I didn’t feel like asking someone to risk their life. I’ve got enough of everything on hand to get by for another couple of days.

Fronkenshteen

Will Maurkice’s HOF bust have Lev Bell’s hand on his ass? Because he should get in for making that chump look like Gayle Sayers.

Brick Meathook
Viva La Tabula Raza

Got about 6 inches of snow last night. It only melted a little in the sun today, temp never got over 30 and single digits are forecast for overnight. I had one pipe burst outside, it’s the supply line for the automatic level control for the pool so not critical. I don’t think closing the supply valve would have saved it, line would have still been full of water, so I guess that means this is the lowest temperature/longest-lasting cold snap that I have seen in the 12 years I have lived here. Wind chill was -11 when I woke up at 0630. At least there were no power outages; apparently there were rolling blackouts down in San Antonio proper.
Old arthritic dog had some difficulty dealing with the snow, but did manage to have two excretory wanders around the yard, so that’s good.
Car was totally mounded in snow, and the roads were reportedly pretty icy, so I didn’t get to the liquor store.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Game Time Decision

6 inches of snow means that I’m power sliding around corners all day. Weeeee

I turn off traction control as best I can and force 4 wheel drive and when safe, slide.

litre_cola

Oh yeah, pull that E brake my friend.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m smart enough to know I’d kill myself or someone else if I went out in these road conditions and drove like that. I have no experience driving in those conditions.

Doktor Zymm

Too bad your dog isn’t a sled dog, then you could have combined walkies with supply trip

Viva La Tabula Raza

Were she a bit younger, maybe. She’s a chow mix, but her arthritis is so bad that she can’t bend her front legs, she has to hop rather than walk, don’t want to get arrested for animal cruelty…