Your Still in March Unveiling of the Banner Tournament Authors and Champion!

What the above said, which is why this is being posted now. It's still March! But first things first, the final results, since it is the final. Drum roll please? That is a weak timpani solo, as when I played it it was an entire cadenza, but let's try that again. Your

Your 2019 Banner Tournament Championship and Flacco Eight Saturday Evening Open Thread

We got a big one going tonight, so let's get started. We'll start off with the lesser important stuff. NCAA Tournament Action: It's the Flacco Eight! Winners move to the Wrongly-Named Four. West Regional Final: #1 Gonzaga vs. #3 Texas Tech (6:09 Eastern, TBS) South Regional Final: #1 Virginia vs. #3 Purdue (8:49 Eastern,

The 2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament Penultimate Four Wait, did I not specifically say that it's the Penultimate Four because it is NOT final? Yes, but I've got the song for tomorrow already lined up. Or even… SONGS. Welcome to the Super Smash Bros. Melee Final Destination stage, which as everyone knows is the only place you're allowed to

2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: Ice Milk Eight, Day 1

Welcome to the Ice Milk Eight, sponsored by Flanders' Unflavored Non-Fat Ice Milk! Don't be swayed by pretenders! Which is apparently a thing now, it's a brand of organic, uh, milk substitutes? I'm not using the term "nut juice," but, yes. That. We have the semifinal results in the BLEERGH Region, to see

2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: The Saucy 16, Day 3

We enter the final week of this shindig, and that's the interesting week where it gets good because there's championships and stuff to be won. At this point there are 12 entries left after the first two days of matchups. Bring out the entries! Okay, maybe a little less circus-y. Can

2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: The Saucy 16, Day 2

Let's just run down the rest of the second round results before we get to today's Saucy 16 action. Of course, the Saucy 16 is sponsored by Senor's House of Pain: New episodes coming this April! Fuck, we've already gone corporate. Welp, let's get through these. First the SHAN'KHOR Regional's results. 1.

2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: Second Round, Day 7

The round's almost over, so dance break! And then we shall be down to 16, a full round ahead of the real one! It all comes a-barrelin' to the end of the month. In addition, a couple notes on what's coming up in April—the filming of BattleBots Season 4, which means

2019 [DFO] Banner Tournament: Second Round, Day 6

It's a double dip, and with some updates! And now we can say Happy Tournament. WELCOME TO THE MADNESS. Or the Muse song, but they used that a bunch of years ago. Hell, they might still be using it? Meanwhile, here are some second round updates. Second Round, BLEERGH Region 1. “Aaron Hernandez (neck)