Your “Holy shit, the Dolphins still exist?” 2019 Preview

/Scene opens with Wakezilla laying in bed, his two hands behind his head and his eyes wide open. Underneath the sheets is another body that begins just below Wakezilla's waist, with a head bobbing up and down. The bobbing stops and the sheets are raised to reveal Mrs. Wakezilla, wearing

Your Kill! Kill! Kill! How Lesser Footy caused World War III open thread

As much as we like to pretend sports is pure and innocent, we all know she has taken a few pokes from the tips of wealthy businessmen over the years and has definitely done anal (it's the sex  God can't see if you're hetero-- sorry LGBTQ). It's why in every Lesser

TWIFY: Qatar. Today’s Copa América team Preview

 Wakezilla sitting in the back of a limo while his driver, a black male, has a stressed look on his face, is driving on Salwa road in Doha, Qatar. Wakezilla: Marhaba! Assalamu Alaikum my DFO friends! Your pal Wakezilla recently got a life changing promotion that required me to move to

A Tradition Like Any Other: Augusta National Can F*** Right Off

Here's a secret: I despise the dipshits who run Augusta National Golf Club. Glad-handing, misogynist dickheads who use the ideas of "tradition" and "the old ways" to actively make their golf tournament as white as possible. IT'S A GOLF TOURNAMENT YOU FUCKING FUCKS. Fuck these people with Satan's chainsaw wang. Yeah,

Your Saturday Evening “Why Do I Do This Every Year?” [DFO] Hate Week Open Thread

Site news: Please consider this a friendly reminder to any lurkers or casual observers of the site - if you want to participate in our largest live-blog of the year tomorrow, just click on the register link at the top of the page. I will try to drunkenly approve folks in

[DFO] Hate Week Presents: Owners Who Suck – Stan Kroenke & Dean Spanos

Today's final installment of [DFO] Hate Week is brought to you by marrying rich, prenuptial agreements, and the Mayflower Moving Company. Now, normally the fourth day & final day of [DFO] Hate Week is set aside for attacking pet peeves I've had with the league over the year: GOODELL, Roger DISGRACE,

[DFO] Hate Week Presents: The LA Rams – A Team You Learn To Hate

I hope you've enjoyed the week so far. Sorry today was a little late - work got in the way. This third installment of the Third Annual [DFO] Hate Week is brought to you by what's left of the Grateful Dead, California Emissions Standards, and the 1-Eleven Neighborhood Crips, a division of

[DFO] Hate Week Presents: The New England Patriots – An Open Thread (Of Hate)

Welcome to the second day of the Third Annual DFO Hate Week™, brought to you by the Quincy Market, the USS Constitution, and Boston drivers - where road rage is for both in front of & behind the wheel.     I could easily just repost my Hate Week articles from 2017

[DFO] Hate Week Presents: The State of the NFL – An Open Thread

Welcome to another [DFO] recurring tradition: Hate Week - where we examine various aspects of the game which culminate in this year's Super Bowl. Tonight's first installment in the third year of this tradition is all about the state of the NFL itself, brought to you by medicinal marijuana, arbitrary justice,